Why are people STILL so shocked by this?

I was at a speech and debate tournament this Thursday-Saturday, and I ended up really befriending some debate people that went to the college where it was held. There was this really attractive guy that the friends I just met kept I guess hitting on, he was a friend of their's. I thought he was attractive, and at one point we had a pretty good discussion about our religious beliefs, him being agnostic, myself being atheist. All around he seemed like a pretty cool guy. Personally, I hate those "what if" thoughts so I decided to just ask him for his number before leaving, he was fairly eager to give it. I did this in front of kind of a group of girls and they were all pretty shocked. Me being as confident as I am, didn't think much of it, when I want something, I try to get it, life's too short to have wasted chances. i just really don't get why the girls made such a big deal over me just asking for his number honestly, thought this kinda thing was the "norm" now.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • i don't get it either, i make the first move all the time. i wouldn't be with my current boyfriend if i hadn't been bold enough to flirt with him and show interest. i make plans for us all the time, i text him first, i asked if we were a couple or not. and my roommates are all like "no way am i texting him first, he has to text me!" "why hasn't he asked me out yet?" "why doesn't he know he should come to the party we're having? i'm not inviting him!" it makes absolutely zero sense to me!

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    • Happy to know not all women are that backwards! To me, to be a successful woman in this world you can't be shy or afraid to voice what you want, a closed mouth will get you no where.

    • so true! and it's also like, you might as well go for it because you have nothing to lose but you could gain something great!

What Guys Said 11

  • Probably just because they don't have the balls to do it themselves... I know quite a few girls who'd do it, nothing wrong with initiative.

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  • It should be the norm, but idiots like those girls are holding it back.

    Just think "Whatever, bitches. I've got his number, it's just you and your middle fingers tonight."

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  • It is, your friends are either jealous or idiots. You did the right thing. I agree with you. Life is short. You want something go after it. I hope things work out for you.

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  • they were jealous, not shocked. A huge difference.

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  • Most girls still don't make first moves, they leave it all up to the guy, so seeing a woman doing something different was, like you said, shocking.

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  • Fucking stupid, it's 2014 ladies, why don't you take action on finding men instead waiting for "Mr. Perfect" whilst complaining about how every guy who approaches you is a creep.

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  • "Me being as confident as I am"

    Most people aren't like you, so it's not at all surprising that they'd find it "shocking", especially when the percentage of girls who ask guys out to be a significantly small number.

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  • You don't see girls making the first move. So it's always catches someone by surprise seeing that happen lol

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  • It's a stupid tradition or social norm in my opinion, I dislike a lot about feminism, but shouldn't this be one of the good things for guys, since we are "equal" why is it a big deal if the girl asks the guy out?

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  • Good for you! I wish there were more girls like you. I don't get that either.

    I hear so many girls say they don't do it because guys don't want girls to, which is complete nonsense.

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  • It's just because women basically never do that. For whatever reason women try to do as little as possible. I think a girl asking out a guy is fine. If you want somebody go for them. Makes no sense to not do it and just hope the guy does it

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    • Exactly lol. I usually have a pretty good read on people and I could tell this guy wouldn't make the first move, maybe after more time talking but there's limited time obviously lol

What Girls Said 3

  • I think its not good for a woman to pursue a guy. Men go after who they want but they will take scraps if they're thrown his way. I'd rather be the woman he feverishly pursues than the woman who had to go out of her way to get his attention. Men still need to be men.

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  • You go girl... I don't always make the first move but I do sometimes its not soley the dudes responsibility to make the moves... Guys like girls who take action... What a nicce gesture you took the nervousness away for him... life is all about taking chances... going after what you want and not settling for anything less... Completely agree with you...

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  • I don't know.
    It's the norm here too.
    Maybe because they were shy?

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    • Haha these girls were for sure not shy, which is part of the reason why I ended up becoming pretty cool with them. There was only one girl where I wasn't sure or not if she actually liked him or was just joking. When he gave me his number she seemed pretty shocked lol when she's known him longer than I have

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