My boyfriend called my bestfriend "hot"?

[Anonymous]

Okay. So. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost 2 months (not a lot of time, I know) anyway we are both in Highschool and I like him a lot and i think/thought he liked me a lot too...

So the trouble is that we were texting earlier and I happened to mention my bestfried. Then we got to talking about her and I was all "literally so many guys like here" and I'm not saying that lightly. My bff is extremely gorgeous and flawless and beautiful and sweet and has guys practically begging to be with her. I'm not saying I'm not pretty. Because I am (dont mean to be rude). But I guess im just not quite as guy magnetic. Anyways, haha, his reply was "well I mean, she's hot. I would date her. Sigh." Okay I'm not gonna lie. I read that and broke down. Like there were legit tears. And honestly I felt really really stupid because I was probably seriously over reacting. It's not the fact that he would call her hot, because she is, and he was probably joking... But it's the fact that he told it to me. Plus, he has told me in the past that he doesn't like it when girls talk about hot guys in front of him, so why would he do it to me... About my bestfriend? And what was the sigh all about? It made me like... Dought myself, almost like not think I was good enough, and it wasn't okay for him to make me feel that way about my bestfriend... And I'm not the jealous type.

After everything happened.. I kinda got to thinking. So, he met my bff first and always seems to care about her. Always trying to help her with probs and stuff because they're aquantence/friends too. Also, the other day we were walking and he legit left me to grab her hand and walk with her (as a joke) and of course my friend left him and ran to me because she is absolutely the sweetest thing ever. (: but all of this is just making me wonder if there was something that I had missed about our relationship? He has called me hot before too.. If that helps. Thank you for any replies!! mwuaa (:

[Nazgrel]

My most intuitive opinion is that... it's really (REALLY) not normal. Not just uncommon: unnormal.
You have been dating for 2 months, it should not be anywhere near the point where he "makes a move" (even as a "joke") on your best girlfriend. Not even after 1, 10, 50 years, but especially not after that short of a time.

At least he should know that it may (and it probably will) make uncomfortable. That's just common f*cking sense. I used to be pretty close to emotional autist from time to time when it came to my girlfriend's (or girl's) feeling, but... there is a fine line between making bad or unfortunate statements or acts towards or near her/him, and doing something that careless and cruel.

Talk to him as soon as you can about this. It could have been you being a bit jealous about this topic, but I assure you, the things you mentioned are pretty damn far from you being at fault.

Good luck.

[Pedantic]

My honest advice is ditch the guy for someone with some real social skills. Men are bombarded with hot-girl imagery and even in real life actual girls being hot. Some cheat, some don't. But whichever camp you are in, the golden rule is not to open your yap about it. Like THAT is going to impress a woman ("heh, I want to do this other chick!"). Ummm, yeah, does he think he is going to impress you now or what? Even with bi-girls, it is better to let them say something first and just kind of try to stay on the same page.

Well, yearning for friend or not, he's got loose lips. They'll sink ships.

Who knows, perhaps you will be his first teacher of this very important lesson.

[bubble_tea]

Rule No 1
DO NOT ask questions when you're not prepared to hear the truth.

[Wisenguber]

Listen you guys are teens, and teens are hot and bothered especially little boys, so yeah he is secretly crushing on her and probably fantasizes about you both, its a dog eat dog, world, and I'd just have trust in your gf not to fall for your bf, as far as lover boy, Watch him with a close eye, and hell talk about hot guys... treat him as he treats you. Sorry no offense but most cases, relationships in highschool are not permenant and very exchangable... meaning everybody dates everybody... dont sweat it kid, be cool and enjoy your youth.

[GiveMeABreakPlz]

You're dating a high school kid, is it to be expected. They don't know how girls think. He'll I was dense as HELL in high school.

A- He didn't know it would bother you (inexperienced with girls)
B- Inconsiderate douche

Which one is he? Only you know.

[matheus_mb]

He was probably joking. You can tell him that how you felt about it thought, say it kindly. I think he'll understand, it's reasonable understandble in my opinion. Secretly keeping an eye on him wouldn't be a bad thing though, we can never know the true reasons of why people say some things.

[matheus_mb]

I'm making too many writing mistakes today xD. Correction: you can tell him how you felt about it though*

[Rloco]

It was okay to say she was attractive but to say he'd date her was not. Let him know it bothered you then just be cautious. Don't be jealous of course but let him know what he said bothered you and that the jokes about liking her bother you.

[Maxemeister]

He met your BFF first but chose to date you? Shouldn't that tell you something?