How can I attract sincere guys and no liers/cheaters and guys with girlfriends?

I am feeling so miserable, I just don't get why this happens over and over again. All guys that approach me when I go out, tend to have a girlfriend and just like to have some fun and then drop me. I don't get why this happens every time! Many times I have kissed guys who then afterwards told me they had girlfriends, and this time this guy really made an effort to get my number and talked to me etc, and the next day immediately texted me to set up a date... But now I found out that he also has a girlfriend! I am getting so sick of guys just using me, as I see it, and never being truly interested in me. I also do net get why this happens, because all guys approaching my friends tend to be nice, sincere, SINGLE guys. I don't dress slutty, or wear tons of make-up or anything that would make me look cheap and easy. I think if anything it is the other way around.. I would really like to meet/attract guys who are sincere, but what should I do about it? Should I change something in my appearance? Or approach guys myself? Because I never do that, and the only ones who approach me tend to be assholes :(


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I wouldn't blame yourself for it. At thins age you'd actually have to be lucky to get together with a guy who wasn't an asshole, a liar, or a cheater! lol. Those are the dudes who go out there and get it. It's even the case sometimes when you get with someone shy and reserved, you bring them out of their shell and they throw it back in your face and run off with someone else. All this kind of shit happened to me back in the day. These days I'm not cut up about it, I don't need to be with someone to be happy. If I meet someone who treats me badly it doesn't bother me either, I know it's not a reflection on me. But I know there's hope, nice girls exist out there- I just haven't met one yet! lol

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What Guys Said 6

  • I feel like too many women just want to sit back and wait for men to approach and make the first move. Unfortunately, many men who have other interests, careers, or school and actually want a relationship do get frustrated with the constant rejection from women. Don't get me wrong we still do it, but far less often then the assholes who really don't care about anything other than themselves and really don't care how often they get rejected because they don't care about the woman, or they know they have a backup (their girlfriend).

    I would suggest at least trying to talk to guys that seem a little more shy or distracted with other pursuits (job, school, etc .) Also, keep in mind if a guy is really shy you might actually need to ask him out point blank if you want anything to happen. You may get rejected and yes it hurts, but I believe in the long run you will meet many more single guys who do want a relationship.

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  • I frankly don't think there's anything u can do to attract "better" guys based on what you said here... you're just going through a bad batch of guys at the moment.

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  • I'll tell you if you can tell me how to attract a girl who won't randomly lose interest and just stop responding for no apparent reason.

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  • Stop paying attention the players and learn to vet the guys you meet. There are plenty of sincere, stable guys out there, but girls usually overlook us in favor of the loudest, jokiest guy in the room.

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    • Well I don't really have the guts to actively approach guys myself, so I usually just respond to the guys approaching me. But then this always happens. I also don't usually fall for the loud, player kind of guys, but sometimes they look all nice and sincere but then it turns out they aren't after all..

    • I'm not saying that you have to approach those guys, but you do need to be able to assess guys and weed out the players. It isn't that hard. If a guy is giving you a hard sell, he's probably a player. And the less nervous a guy seems when he approaches you, the less he cares about you. Hence the suave, slick dudes are usually the *least* sincere. They're in it to get what they want without regard for your feelings.

  • approach them yourself. look in the right places too. nice guys dont hang out at bars too much.

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  • Because girls only want to be with the fun exciting guys who tend to do these things.

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What Girls Said 1

  • By knowing that you are a good person and therefore are capable of attracting another good person. Thoughts become things. If you think all you attract is shitty guys, then all you will get is shitty guys. Change the frequency that you are sending out and watch the things in your life change.

    Be confident, light hearted and happy. Assholes prey on girls who look sad or appear to have low self esteem. They are able to get away with a lot more that way.

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    • Thanks for your comment! Mhh.. I don't know, I tend to get more comments that I actually look arrogant (which I am not, but I am quite shy and not ugly so I guess this combination gives off an impression of arrogance) so I'm not sure they are preying on my low self esteem.. But I'll keep it in mind ;)

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