Do girls like a strong guy who open emotionally?

I would consider to be like this even though it took me a while to. open up to my girl. You would look at me think I'm the scariest dude there and my reputation stands for that but I'm really open with my girlfriend and she's the only that has seen my 'softer side'.

Updates:
Got a lot of feedback. Yeah I'm a military guy look like a meathead have a bad reputation from my past but my girl is the only one I've ever opened up to.
Jesus. This question got so much feedback.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • we only like rich guysssssssss

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What Girls Said 78

  • My boyfriend is a gooey teddy bear baby hiding behind the exterior of a badass.

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  • girls like being able to break down a tough guy's walls.

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  • I don't think I could ever be loyal around a guy whose not vulnerable around me. He has to be vulnerable to a certain extent.

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  • Do girls like a strong guy who open emotionally?
    Some gals do. This gal doesn't I find guys generally will use what a gal has said or done against a gal in an argument, tell their friends, or spread sexual matter as revenge. So to me there's way too much risk for what an open emotionally guy will do.

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    • Then he's immature and probably a little on the dumb side; less than average IQ.

  • yes. us girls have no idea of what you're thinking… well at least i don't.. if your open up to her the connection becomes stronger and she feels special because you are able to let her seen you when you are vulnerable. we like that. we don't want to be the only ones that are sensitive! but dent be too sensitive.. find a balance without looking bipolar!! hope that helps

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  • Well honestly, I can't speak for all girls but for me reputation doesn't stand for much with me. If you can open up to your girlfriend/partner, that's all that matters. Looks don't matter much to me. My best friend is also in the military and I'm one of only people, even one of only girls he can freely talk to knowing that he won't be judged. It's just that you are slightly more reserved when it comes to talking about those things to most.

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  • My ex was 6'1. Was an MMA fighter. Bald, with tattoo sleeves. Everyone is scared of him. He was a sarcastic jerk, we got along that way. But the point is he didn't seem like a nice guy. But wow he was so incredibly sweet, mature, and completely open with me. I was shocked when he told me about tragic things that happen to him, and even shed a tear talking about things. That to me is an emotionally strong person. It shows confidence. I find that to be one of the sexiest things.. wow i just realized i miss him. fuck.

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  • We do like for a guy to be open emotionally but no overly emotional. That's just too much. If you're spilling your guts every 15 mins that can be too much.

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  • Yes, I know that men tend to hide their emotions because they think it would make them look less of a man but I love a man I can connect with emotionally.. , whose isn't afraid to show how he truly feels

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  • See it depends on how long you've been with the girl.
    If you don't open up easily then that's YOU.
    And at any cost you should not give up being yourself. But if are in a serious relationship with someone then definitely your girl will want to see your softer side. That can be because if she's the only one opening up then she might feel vulnerable around you. Opening up emotionally will not only make you feel better but also show that you are all in.

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  • I like that... it made me feel that he's comfortable with me and he's not afraid of showing who he is (deep down and out) and made me think he is a real strong man beyond physical...
    Some men may think only weak guys show their emotional side, but actually many women may think the opposite..
    but showing too much (especially negative ones) are not healthy and a turn off sometimes for me.. a balance is always good.. :)

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  • My guy is so tough and so strong and I respect and love that about him. However he does open up to me and express himself and has been on the verge of crying. He told me it makes him love me more because he could never say such things to his guyfriends, and he also feel that I don't treat him any different or less for being less than strong at times. People who love you understand we all have emotion its just human. I love him more because I feel he is being real and I get to see different dimensions of him.

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  • Manly or more on the feminine, everyone is human. Everyone has bruises and weaknesses. If you're always covering that up and never letting your guard down, girls see through that and it makes us frustrated. It's kinda like you're trying to pull a "I'm perfect" and that pisses everyone off. As a spouse or close friend, it makes us feel special when you break down or open up to us.

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  • Yes of course, it helps you to get close to someone emotionally. It makes you vulnerable which shows how much you trust them.

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  • Yes I love guys who are open, but not TOO open right away. Let me work for it. But open is an amazing quality.

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  • Yes we do ;) My SO is that way, looks all rough and tough on the outside, but when he's with me he's really sweet and gentle.

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  • I think it is adorable and I think most girls do to. Being able to open up to her and show her your "soft side" shows that you trust her. It makes her feel special that she gets to know the emotional you.

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  • Here is the catch-22: I like guys to be emotionally available, without being emotional. I want a guy to be a man, and do man stuff, and be tough and hard and manly. However, once in a while I would like to see his tender side.

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  • I think almost every girl dreams of that

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  • We like when guys are in touch with their emotions, it shows you're genuine and easy to talk to. just don't be overboard with insecurity and moodiness. Otherwise, we love it!

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  • That is a definite turn on! If I had a boyfriend I would open up to him if we got serious and I would expect the same from him!

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  • Honestly it wouldn't bother me at the end of the day it's your past which belongs in the past and if I had a so called 'scary guy' being a softie with me I would love it since it proves how much he cares about us and shows how serious he is about the relationship.

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  • Yes defintely, it shows your strength of character to be able to open up like that. Cos a lot of people find that difficult to do. We all need someone we feel comfortable with to open up too.

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  • When in public, he needs to be "appropriately" emotional (not cry because he sees a sunset, hehe) but when it's just the two of us I think it's pretty mean to say the man can't open up. Everybody has feelings that they need to talk about sometimes. But hey - that's just my opinion.

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    • I'm not really the type to cry when I see a sunset ahhahaha

    • haha, fair enough :-) Well, some people are pretty sensitive so you never know what to expect :-)

  • I am marrying a strong man that is emotionally available, i also know plenty of friends that have married men that can explain the I feelings (maybe not breaking down or cry in but at least put into words the way they feel) I believe a mature man and woman can have conversations about feelings and opinions and not even consider that they may be vulnerable or society may frown on a tear or a break down. Life is onshore to define yourself by general stereotypes.

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  • Um I don't like scary looking tough guys to be honest. But yes we do want a "tough guy on the outside but a ssoft guy on the inside"

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  • I can't speak for every girl, but I certainly do.

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  • I think that if guys were more like that then they wouldn't have trouble asking girls out. A person that you consider having a relationship with should be someone that you aren't afraid to open up to.

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  • The word like is not enough. I LOVE this kind of guys. It makes me feel like he trusts me in everything

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  • Yes, it shows us you truly care about us and trust us.

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What Guys Said 9

  • Never open up to women that you are in relationship with. I made that mistake, and she fucked me up, and revealed things that I told her in strict confidence and hyped up everything.

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  • This is a classic example of women SAYING they want something... then being turn off after getting what they asked for.

    To be blunt, emotionally pouring yourself out to a woman in the beginning of the monogamous relationship has very little benefit, and a LARGE risk that she will start losing attraction to you.

    The cost-benefit analysis of doing the above, shows this is a bad move!

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  • When you said it took you a while to open up to your girlfriend, describe that, like what was it like when you and her first met? She must of had more of a crush on you than you did with her.

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    • Took me really over a year to open up. Her feelings were a lot stronger than mine in the start. When we first met it was just all sex and hooking up. Really good sex I must add.

  • I'm the same way dude, a lot of people look at me and I am nothin but some meathead lookin for trouble, but any girl I've dated will tell you I am one of the sweetest people they know.

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  • I think girls like that yes they want a guy to be bad to others, but nice to her.

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  • no because humans are complex...

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  • yes they like a guy who shows the softer side even if they deny it

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  • define strength my friend.

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  • Be careful opening up to a woman. They say they like it, but it really depends on what you open up about. If you admit to any insecurity, she will see you as weaker, less confident, and less attractive.

    Women crave strong men. Not guys that have serious self-esteem issues. You open up about the wrong thing and your relationship may suffer. Remember anything you tell them, they are very likely to tell their friends, or you against you during an argument. If you need to open up I suggest using a therapist instead of your girlfriend.

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    • Well that makes you sound like you have issues that you're ashamed and insecure about. When a guy is strong enough to let all their walls down, and shows a girl that he can tell her anything and evertything, its really securing and intimate. Girls want to feel secure. We love intimacy. I get the feel that you shared the "wrong" thing to the "wrong" girl and she screwed you over.. I'm sorry but not all girls will do that. Not if they really love and care about the guy.

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    • Yeah I feel stupid about it I would never admit somwthing like that to her. She has admitted stuff like that tk me when we were apart. She barley ate slept or went out with friends for months.

      I just don't want her to think I'm actually insecure I just had a moment. She has always has thought of me to be so confident and now I feel that's fucked up.

    • That is what I am saying. Women tell men they want us to open up to them, and guys think we should be able to open up the same as women. That however will backfire almost every single time. Men can not open up the same as women, without turning the woman off.

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