Why is he so confusing?

A few months ago, this guy and I met in college. We've talked everyday since. He is extremely kind, has all the characteristics of a gentlemen and has told me multiple times that he does like me. Friday night, we were together with a few friends. He was constantly flirting with me and when I wasn't around, he was talking about me to his buddies. It was great. Now, it's Monday and I haven't heard from him since.. now all of these negative thoughts are starting to cross my mind, like what if he doesn't have feelings for me and all that other bull. He's not a player, but, he did just get out of a fairly long relationship about 3 months ago which I haven't really spoke to him about. All I know is that it didn't end well. He says he likes me, but also says he doesn't understand what I want when I feel like I've made it clear enough that I would like to date him. When his friends were asking why he hasn't asked me out yet, he said he was trying to figure things out and let some "drama" die down. But he didn't deny his feelings to anyone about me. I just want your guys's opinion on what exactly I should do because this is driving me nuts. Do I text him? Do I wait for a text like I have been? Or just leave the whole thing alone. He told me that leading me on was the last thing he wanted to do, and that he just needs time to figure things out. What do I do? I feel like a little schoolgirl crushing on someone again. I haven't been this shy or anxious around a guy in a long time and it's terrible.


Most Helpful Guy

  • This sounds really familiar to me. There's absolutely nothing wrong with you taking the initiative to contact him. My guess is he'd probably appreciate it, because it'll take some of the responsibility off him. Right now I think that he really does like you, but he wants to take it slow. He's probably over his pas girlfriend, but if he wants to be careful not to let any remnants of his feelings for her get in the way of what he feels for you.

    That you're nervous is a good thing. It means you're serious about this guy and it sounds like he's pretty serious about you too. Just be understanding and show him that he doesn't have to carry full responsibility for everything that happens between you.


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What Guys Said 1

  • All fairness he sounds honest and nice enough. Could be one of two things.

    His he first trying to calm things with his ex to get over her? or has he still got feelings for his ex? Either way he doesn't want to hurt you.

    Maybe he's waiting to see how keen you are. I would text him on Tuesday. Asking him is he alright. When you meet him next I would ask him is he looking for a relationship. I don't mean ask him does he like you but is he looking in general. Thats quite a friendly but intimate question, and not too pushy. If he is honest and nice he would be upfront with you.

    Only one way to find you.


What Girls Said 1

  • iam almost struggling from the same shit
    try to wait a bit untill he gets his stuff together and so if he wanted you he'll come after you