My boyfriend said his preference is prettier than me?

His prefrence is blonde girls with pettite bodies... we dates for 3 years now...

His prefrence always made me insecure... one Day i came off telling my my deepest insecurities it was somthing i really wanted to get off my chest... and his reply was That " i like blondes" it was somthing iv always liked"... then i asked him if he thought blondes were prettier he said "some are"..

I thought if i hot it off my chest maybe his prefrence wouldn't bother me but turns out i no longer feel happy in my relationship..

This was the very first time iv told hum how i feel...


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Drop this ass hole! If he's been dating you for three years and he still doesn't see you as the prettiest woman to him in the room and has the nerve to say it after you spilled your guts-get rid of him. You can do better clearly. You told him your deepest insecurity and he completely disregarded your feelings. I don't blame you for not feeling happy and your relationship it's telling you to get out.

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What Guys Said 11

  • i think its naive to believe that the person dating you should think that you are the most attractive woman alive. You probably aren't, and there will always be a better looking woman who is more appealing than you are. Knowing this fact, having a guy still stick with you and not cheat is a testament to his care for you, and his affinity towards you. Women all too easily get caught up with these ridiculous notions of what love means

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    • It takes more then love.

    • i strongly disagree with people saying that he is not an ideal guy for you or whatever. I mean shit, we know all of one thing about him, and all of a sudden he's not an ideal man. For all i know, the guy saves old ladies from burning buildings, but he just admits openly that out of the millions of women out there, golly gee there's actually a couple who might rival you in looks... if he has stuck with you for 3 years without cheating, and has done his best as a boyfriend, this confession shouldn't concern you in the least bit. No woman can hit the mark of perfection

    • Im still leaving, some love.

  • i'm guessing you're a tall brunette then? I wouldn't worry about his preference all that much if you've been with him for 3 years and had no problems. He still likes you obviously. I mean, people can always find someone hotter than someone else. We can all have preferences for model status people but are we really going to go after them?

    sp.yimg.com/.../th

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    • Im sorry This was a really poor answer... no matter what anyone says

    • Show All
    • Lol she Is hot

    • just out of curiosity, why did you choose to go anon for this question?

  • I can't believe some of these comments

    You're pretty much asking him to lie to you

    He's with you for a reason... Thinking you should be the prettiest woman in his eyes is crazy... love goes much further then physical appearance.

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    • Love. Is not enough for me

  • I prefer brunettes... if you are xD

    This guy is not worth your time, how could he say that to his girlfriend? that is terrible.. you should not be in love with this guy.

    His preference should be said "You are my ideal girl, everything about you is my preference"

    The guys an ass, leave him.

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    • Im a pear shaped brunette actually the opposite of his prefrence...

    • Leave him, really, you deserve better than them remarks.

  • He's pretty insensitive, and just cause he likes certain physical traits doesn't mean he doesn't love you.

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  • yea... i remember you... well glad you said it... but its not gonna change anything... you either have to deal with this or break up and go with a guy who likes brunettes better...

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    • I didn't espect him to change though i knew right from the begining... but i Hope he couldv Just said i didn't have to sorry at least...

    • have you learned that there are some things that your better off not knowing/learning? you need help to overcome your insecurities... or this will hunt you in the rest of your relationships... being a brunette or whatever problem it is you have is not worse than being insecure and self conscious to guys... you need help...

  • Honestly, that wasn't cool of him. That's like telling someone they performed badly in bed, you keep those secrets to yourself. Just try not to take it to heart. Everyone has preferences that you can't really change, just do try to not take it personally

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  • Kick his ass and get a new boyfriend, make him feel like a worm, if you don't feel happy in your relationship is time to move on

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  • Oh well. Break up.

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  • What bothers me is not that he has a preference for a different hair color, what bothers me is that you opened up about your deepest insecurities and he didn't make you feel better. Partners should make each other feel good about themselves - it's not unreasonable to want some reassurance from your guy when you're feeling insecure.
    For what it's worth, I don't find petite blondes attractive at all. Tall brunettes with wide hips are a dream come true for me :D. Your guy should appreciate what he has in you.

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  • You set your boyfriend up to fail. You asked him a question that would either force him to lie, or hurt your feelings. Your boyfriend decided to show you respect by being honest. Some girls are going to be prettier than you. You just need to get use to that. It is unreasonable for you to expect him not to ever find another girl prettier.

    No guy you end up with is going to think you are the prettiest girl on the planet. I know a lot of women expect a man to think that, but they are all delusional. This is all about your insecurity, and not about the fact he was honest. Lets assume you did find a guy that thought you were the prettiest girl in the world. Would it really make you happy, to know he wasn't able to look past a woman's looks and love her for her personality?

    That would be like a guy expecting a woman to believe he has the biggest penis in the world. Imagine you are completely happy with your boyfriend and he asks if his penis is the biggest you ever saw. You can either lie, and have him know you are lying to him, or you can be honest. If you are honest would it be fair for him to be angry at you for not thinking he has the biggest penis in the room at all times? Of course not. If that happened and he came on here complaining about it, he would be ripped apart for being so insecure.

    Of course in modern times, we are suppose to assume the man is always guilty, so I expect this is the type of response you are looking for. (How dare he love you for your personality, and not be completely shallow about looks. What a pig! You should totally break up with him for realizing a woman has more to offer than just her looks. What kind of scumbag does he think he is being honest, about a question you never should have asked him in the first place?)

    I am sorry if this comes across harsh, but no matter how many people you end up finding to agree that your boyfriend is scum, you are being completely unreasonable.

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    • Yeah but this was a dick move on his part , as her boyfriend he should have approached this sensitively no matter how realistic his response was. She told him that she was insecure yet he failed to understand her concerns and comfort her. I know she asked the question but he should have tackled this question smartly.

    • Thanks for understanding @Part6fam

    • So what? Is he suppose to lie to her, just because she opened up to him? As she already said, she already knew how he really felt, so him lying would have just made him look untrustworthy, and that would make her even more insecure. She set him up to fail.

      She is looking for people to tell her what a monster her boyfriend is, just because he wasn't tactful enough. Maybe he could have been more tactful, but him not knowing the best way to respond, doesn't make him an asshole. It just means he isn't super gifted with words when put on the spot like that. Guys hate being asked these questions, because there is no right way to respond.

      Do you really think that he deserves to be dumped, or treated like he is a terrible boyfriend just because he didn't know the absolute best way to handle that question? Apparently the three years they have been together must not mean much, if one poorly chosen response is worth destroying the relationship.

What Girls Said 6

  • Beauty is in the eye of the beholder as the old saying goes. And deep down, also as well, openly having even admitted it with You------I like blondes... so now you have a bit of competition.
    Now that you have heard this and then some, it most likely Is making you feel Insecure and 'No longer happy in my relationship.' I can understand this... you have every right to feel like this and with him being this Honest John, after '3 year' and hopefully counting, it is starting to put a wedge in what you have been nursing and nurturing. However, don't let it go down a beaten path, a War of the Roses.
    The best advice I can give you right now at this point in time, is if you play on it, harp on it or do Anything to Continue it, as far as what he implied with 'Blonde girls with petite bodies,' you will drive him Right in the arms of one of Those girls, losing him forever. He has Chosen You, you are the love of his life, a soul mate, and what beauty you possess, what qualities that make up the characteristics of You as a girl, His Girl, is what he loves and finds worth loving and staying around for.
    I find that you have won half the battle... the rest is up to you now.
    Good luck. xx

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  • I'm very emotionally fragile and I probably would have left because I would have been hurt lots :'( 😢

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  • I'm with the other guy and girl that commented. You should be his ideal. You deserve better and he deserves to lose you.

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  • Girl, men always have high unrealistic standards/images of what their 'perfect' SO is. I'm sure you do too. Think about it, I'm sure your bf doesn't meet every little checkbox on your list of the perfect guy. It's normal. Shouldn't bother you. Don't let it.

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  • You're the one he is with, so he is obvously interested. You know what is unattractive? Your insecurity. Get over yourself.

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  • I mean, its okay to have preferences. And even though guys date some girl, they will propably think some celebrity is hotter than she is, but they still date their girlfriend, why? Because it's more than just looks that matters.

    However in this case he is being very inconsiderate about this subject. He doesn't care how you feel or what you have to say. He didn't compliment on you, he sounds like he wants you to change to look like his "preference" , and that is why this guy is not worth your time.

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