How do you be "boyfriend material" ?

The title says it all really. I heard my crush say when she was talking to her friend that I'm "cute and sweet but not sure he's bf material" and I want to know how to prove that I'm bf material.

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Filler

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Not boyfriend material could refer to the fact that she may think you're a player or alternatively that you're too nice and not dominant/confident enough. The way she described you as cute and sweet alongside it would suggest she thinks that latter. So, to prove her wrong you should put yourself out there and make the first move, offer to take her out or something and assert yourself!

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What Girls Said 29

  • dominance* are u more easily influenced by others or are others more easily influenced by you?
    confident
    passionate
    sensitive..
    self aware of urself and everyone around u.. but pay particular attention to the needs and feelings of the one u like all the time..
    reliable..
    respectful..
    .. calm, grounded.. has self control.. not easily influenced by others..
    a little reserved with others.. that goes for both genders wanting a relationship..
    .. playful.. funny.. teasey.. this keeps romantic sparks and positive tension up..
    .. loyal.. trustworthy.. doesn't talk about other people..
    .. sweet.. romantic gestures
    clear about what he wants and how he feels about a girl, and *expresses* it to her
    .. *being self focused and not bending to every whim of the girl u want is attractive because its a predicator that both will still have their independence when in the relationship.. avoiding loss of identity and losing urself in the other person

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    • Someone give her MHO

      That was the correct answer according to me :)

  • Answer me this: What gives her the authority to make you feel like you need to prove anything to her?
    It is never worth your time to convince a girl (or anyone) that you are good enough for her. If she can't see it on her own, she isn't good enough for you. Plain and simple. Move on and find a girl that will share mutual happiness and appreciation with you.

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    • Its not like that.. it's not whether she worths his time or not by saying this. She just wants to be sure not to run in a "bad" boy or something and that she won't regret it later.

  • How I see it, boyfriend material all depends on the girl. Personally, boyfriend material to me is someone who is masculine and alpha, and makes me feel protected. Boyfriend material is not a list of things that you can go do and it applies to you. It is just the natural vibes you give the girl.

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  • Well maybe she doesn't think of you as boyfriend material because you might not know how to be romantic. A lot of girls hope for one of those romantic-type guys that you typically see in movies. You have to show you that you are loyal to her and show her you love her in cute ways like writing a poem, singing a song, giving her chocolates or taking her to a nice restaurant. You should confess to her and tell her in a really sincere way, all the reasons why you love her and the way she makes you feel. Stuff like that will just make her melt

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    • I think you're right what should I do that's romantic but wouldn't be weird or creepy considering that we aren't dating and are only flirting with each other

    • I really think you should start off by going to a restaurant so you can talk about your interests and you can even tell her things like "You look really beautiful today." "You're so cute when you smile" stuff like that are good to say. I think you should just start off with dates like that. Then after a few dates, build up the courage to tell her how you feel

  • Hi:) The phrase "Boyfriend Material" may mean different things to different people, depending on who you ask. From what you've written, it sounds like you are physically attracted to her but that you don't really know her well enough to know what she is looking for in a guy. The best way for you both to discover if you genuinely have a chance is to spend quality time together, just getting to know each other. Who knows? you may discover that she's not for you , you're not for her or vice versa. Think about it this way... what is it about HER that makes you want to be with HER? What you should not do is attempt to fit a perfect cookie cutter mold of what she says that she wants if thats not truly who you are, just to "get her". Females don't want to be "baited", they want to be understood and loved for who they are. The best relationships start as friendships. Try to get to know her just as a person without the expectation of her liking you and being with you in the future. You both may discover positive things about yourselves and in each other. Just be yourself. xo

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  • Maybe she means protective and lovey dovey, ya know? Can you see yourself cuddling with her and going to dates with her?

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  • um buy her pizza and play video games together all night (well i mean that's how you'd win me over o___o)

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  • Show that you don't play around. To be boyfriend material for most girls is that you have to be considerate, honest, you are not easily distracted (you keep your eyes off of other girls), you have life goals, and you have to put a lot of effort into making her smile and stuff. But it is different for every girl, it depends on her.

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  • Boyfriend material varies from girl to girl. For me, I like when a guy is cute but funny and has a personality. He also has to be nice. No girl wants to date an ass. While many do wind up doing that I can assure you asshole is not a requirement they're looking for when picking a guy. Some girls prefer gamers. Some are athletic and bf material to them is someone they can go to the gym with.

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  • Either she's not attracted to you in a hot and bothered kind of way or she knows and doesn't like something about your past relationships. Maybe find out from her friends or just observe what she likes. It sounds like you definitely have a chance, you just have to give that extra something she's looking for.

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  • maybe u flirt a lot with other women or act not confident, i don't know

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  • I think that one of the most important things is to respect her. So like, don't only care about her boobs and things like that. Give her your full attention when you're with her and just be nice to her in general. I hope this helped :) don't give up on her too easily

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  • Maybe she hasn't seen your mature, manly side? Ask her out on a date! Pick her up, be on time, be yourself, make her laugh, PAY FOR IT and most importantly take her home to make sure she gets home safe.

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  • Don't cheat.

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  • Its better than we share common values e. g. in academic, hobby... etc
    Humor is very important. Also how seriously does he take his relationship, i don't really like guys with too much of a past.
    Physical wise... clean and healthy? taller than me would be appreciated

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  • Youve gotta just spend time with her, make sure you have your financial life together because although it sounds superficial women really do crave stability. Just be yourself to.

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  • Everyone is boyfriend material but its only if she think that. So if she thinks you are a player then no you not boyfriend material you have to show her some trust some respect don't look at another girls ass as they walk near you

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  • be kind, funny, caring, nice, but have your own friends so she can see you're independent too

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  • Well try flirting it up act tough like you will protect her from anything ( that usually does it for me )

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  • Everyone has their own definition but she probably means there's no emotional connection

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  • Are you sure you are not friend zoned? Maybe instead of trying to be something you are not just confess already! Lol hope it goes well for you!

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  • Are you dependable and loyal? Are you looking to fall in love seriously? If the answer is yes to both questions you are on your way to becoming boyfriend material.

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  • Be nice, be clean, be respectable, be trustworthy.

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  • Being "boyfriend material" varies from girl to girl. Some girls have high standers and expectations from a boyfriend like giving her your time and attention being there when she needs you to be and just having the confidence to know you're a good boyfriend. Then there's girls who say "I don't know if he's boyfriend meterial” because they don't have the confidence to be relationship, its an excuse girls been using since Saratoga Fall. But they only way you can know is by asking her directly, just like every guy is different so is every girl. All in all, you should never have to prove yourself to anyone but yourself. If she can't already see how crazy you are for her then that's her loss. Still it doesn't hurt to ask right? Good luck!!!

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  • I think it was good your crush was talking about you! Maybe she likes you? :) I think boyfriend material is someone who is just devoted to me. Someone who doesn't flirt with others except me. He should only be interested in me. Someone who isn't an ahole to others and me. A person you can trust and me honest with. Compliment her. Make her feel special. Like she is the only girl your interested in. Be upfront with her and tell her that you like her.

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  • at this age, consider researching
    best friend
    butler
    trophy guy

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  • Be a man and ask her out. Boyfriend material = Confidence. Just go up to her, look her in the eye, and ask her out. She wants you to be a man and take charge. I'm being as blunt as possible.

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  • She may be one of those girls who expects things from her boyfriend, flowers on special occasions, fancy restaurants on first dates, etc. or, she may be thinking you're not going to maintain the relationship well.

    When we think of a boyfriend, we think of someone who takes care of us, holds us close, comforts us, etc. kind of like a protective figure, so she may not see you in that light.

    The thing is with girls, they think they want something in a boyfriend, but when they see a guy who sincerely genuinely likes them, they change their perception.

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  • dont ask her out she might get a little scared of you. are you friends with her? then just say you want to invite her over for a movie or something. then when your watching the movie thry to hold her hand but nothing more.

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What Guys Said 24

  • Imagine you are in a multi-storied building. What you point as the floor is the ceiling for someone in the floor below you. In other words... you try your whole life being BF material for one girl, and immediately ten other girls come up and say you aren't BF material.
    So what do you do?
    Be yourself. Girls are comfortable with Guys who are comfortable with themselves. Build your life, create an identity for yourself. Be confident and sure about who you are your, your thoughts and everything about you.
    And see for yourself... without even trying and without even realizing it... girls will find you to be BF material.
    And anyway to answer your question - Girls love Guys who they (the girls) can be proud to be around with, someone who can make them feel special (without degrading themselves) and someone who can make them feel secure.
    Wish you all the best mate :)

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  • You're being set up for failure. The phrase itself has no intelligible value; when someone says they don't consider you boyfriend material it likely means they don't find something you actually cannot change attractive; there's a huge difference for instance between being good looking and being genuinely attractive to a person.

    The better bet is to not pursue these people particularly because regardless of your first idea being that you can win them over even if you win them over it will primarily be a temporary victory since they don't actually like you for who you are and saving a kitten out of a tree only lasts for a short time then diminishes; you have long-term traits she's not interested in.

    Your problem is you're thinking in mirrored terms. She just does not like your personality. Unless you're a skilled pathological liar you're not going to have what it takes to put up the perfect front. This isn't a romantic comedy.

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  • This has the most important element for avoiding the 'friend zone.'

    encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images

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  • Wow this happened to me 2 weeks ago. I was cute and sweet but she said not boyfriend material. Only women think like this my friend!

    Now that you proved that you're sweet and cute, prove her that you're a real man that does manly stuff. Take pride in yourself and invite her. DO NOT ASK HER WHERE SHE WANTS TO GO! Just tell her you wanna see her and GO SOMEWHERE without asking her permission.

    That proves that you have balls, it shows that when you wanna do something, you do it whether she wants it or not. It's kind of retarded since this has nothing to do with the "relationship" in the long term, but yeah women are very special creatures!

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  • It means you have to go to extraordinary lengths to complete the 'Alpha Male'/'Prince Charming' expectations. Then later down the road she will cheat you with a more Alpha male. (Female version of 'Girl must have big boobs')

    Avoid her at all costs.

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  • NUMBER 1: don't "try" to do anything just because of this. Don't change yourself.
    NUMBER 2: ask her the fuck out

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  • 1) Be authentic
    2) Be yourself
    3) Be nice to the girl you like
    4) Have an active life/interests
    5) Stay relaxed

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  • 1) Don't worship the ground she walks on
    2) have your own opinions
    3)?
    4) be independent
    5) have cojones
    6) Profit

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  • Just be yourself mate, if it's going to happen it will. Or both get really drunk together and see what happens!
    As one of my favorite movie's line goes "God made alcohol as a social lubricant. To make men brave, and to make women loose."

    Or do what most men do, try too hard, pretend you are into everything they are, have the same opinions loves and hates, bullshit it, most of the most successful people in the world just bullshit it. It won't be a healthy long lasting relationship but you'll get laid. Yeah you'll get hurt and break her heart, only you can decide what to do.

    another quote that applies here is

    Join the darkside, we have cookies!

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  • just give it up... she doesn't like you

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  • It's simple. Be confident, not arrogant. Be good looking but not into your looks. Be a bad boy, but be nice to everyone.

    Also the definition of all the above changes depending on the girl and also where she is in her monthly cycle. Good luck!

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    • hahaha. Loved the monthly cycle bit. I know I have experienced this myself.

  • What she said is secret female code which translates to "I like him better than you but I'd still like to keep you my back up plan"
    Screw this cow man... being someone's back up plan sucks big time...
    A girl who likes you will say that you are perfect "boyfriend material"... Don't let any girl trick you into believing that you can win her over... You can't win. The game is rigged against you...
    Hit up another chick...

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  • Sounds like a stuck up bitch to me. You are boy friend material buddy you just need to find a better girl.

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  • Just be faithful and show that u don't take her for granted. Be the man she wants without changing who u are

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  • you're the backup guy.

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  • Friendzoned bro. Accept it and just move on.

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  • Ask her what kind of man she's into or better yet what she looks for in a man, if she's not looking for where you are when you're being yourself ask her friend what she's looking for in a man maybe she'll be better for you anyway.

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  • All I can really say is don't be an idiot, don't be a coward, and be with someone who shares all or almost all your values.

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  • put a note telling her to meet you a t lunch preferably alone and tell her your feelings if she says no who cares there's like 4 2332131313 girls out there

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  • just be yourself. dont get too eager to be in relationship. have fun and enjoy the life way you are. surely one day any girl would fall for you

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  • Girls say they want this stuff but never put it into action

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  • she cannot see you and her in a relatinoship..

    it's subjective..

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  • I am apparently bf material and my gf likes big guys that she can cuddle so I am big bf material, so from that statement not all girls are like that do hence forth it varies in each girls opinion

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  • It could be a lot of things.

    If you want to prove yourself as bf material, gain some muscle. Also, do well in a sporting or dancing contest of any kind. Be bold. Make people do things.

    Being able to play music, act, write poetry or similar can help, but consider them secondary options unless the woman in question is particularly into such things.

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