I met a the perfect guy and screwed up. Help me?

I met this guy online and we've been texting/talking on the phone for 2-3 months now. He seems perfect, he's boring, loves the kind of stuff Iike and we seemed to click over the phone. We finally went out and I acted like a complete idiot. I treated him like I treat every other guy who doesn't care about intellectual stuff and acted like a shallow, mean self centered bitch. Date was one of the worst dates ever but he's perfect IF I hadn't put on a fake front I tend to put on in front of most people I meet.

I talked to him over the next two days and told him honestly, that I have issues and I always have a fake mask on and I would like a do over date where I want to try to put my walls down and actually be myself. He said he'll "ponder/ think" about it and I said okay, thanks. and thats that. This was last night. Haven't heard back from him, but its been less than 24 hours. I feel like I finally met someone who is genuinely nice and caring, unlike every asshole I've dated in the past, and he's interested in the same boring stuff that most people scoff at me when I bring it up.

Its all my fault and I feel like I let someone great get away because of my issues and I get scared and ruined the date on purpose. And now I feel miserable and feel like he'll never talk to me again. I'm actually NOT like that. I'm not the bitch I was when I went out with him.. I don't know why I had to negate everything. Help me?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I wouldn't be shocked if you scared him away. Immediately it's clear for one to see if they were to enter into a relationship with you many issues would be brought to the table.
    IF he decides not to have a "do over date" I doubt blame him.
    But if he does, that's fantastic !
    I hope u learn from this experience and let people see you for who you really are.
    You can potentially ruin any relationship (that forms) if you do not let your guard down.


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What Guys Said 5

  • if he was perfect he'd have dealt with this better

  • Nobody on here can help you, you have an issue that only you can resolve. You've identified your problem, now work towards finding a solution.

    • But.. what do I do to get him back? We seemed to click really well but the first date was shit. >.<

    • Show All
    • I was being a tiny bit facetious but nvm haha thanks anyway man!

    • Woosh* that went way over my head, but that's cool man. Peace to you.

  • What "boring" stuff is he in to?

  • Learn from your mistake and hope he forgives you.

  • ask for another date,

    • I did.. He said I didn't we click the first date, and I said, it was all my fault, me being the "fake" me and scared to be honest and I said if we have a do over I can open myself up a bit and he said he'll think about it and get back to me.

    • Well then I guess its best to give him that time. You should try to take this slowly. If you rush it, you may fail again.

    • How long do I wait for before asking him if he has had time to think it through?

What Girls Said 4

  • You need to be single if you can not open up

  • Don't meet people online. It never lasts. Everytime I read any question with the word online in it I actually cringe.

  • I think as long as your honest with him he should understand. Maybe let him know how much you care about him as reassurance!! but for now wait it out!! hope it works out for you!! please update if something happens!! ^-^

  • Wait for him to respond. If you start nagging and pleading for a new date, then you will seem even worse and he will probably think you have some issues. And the truth is, no one want to deal with your issues.

    hmm speaking of perfect guy. It seems as if he is only perfect in your head, and that it is the idea of him that you like. I think that if you truly meet someone perfect, the meeting will be one fun chemistry party-bubble. Haha
    I would advise you to put your phone away a couple of days and try not to overthink the situasion, as all of us girls do... Give yourself some time before making decisions or getting any new ideas :) Good luck.

    • Thank you!! Should I wait a week? two? He said he'll "ponder" it over and get back to me and I was like alright then. Should I just not text/call him and wait for him, if he never responds.. just move on?

    • I think you should just wait, and if there is no response from him- move on :) I know it doesn't seem like it, but you will meet other guys and get the "he is perfect" feeling, so don't be too sad! Promise ^_^

    • Ahw thanks! You're right. I actually feel loads better after the responses I got from all of you. :)