Plentyoffish. That site is so depressing!!! Anyone else experience that site?

At this point, it's a joke of a dating site. I no longer have motivation to meet anyone from there or even from the net for that matter.

So I stick to those forums. But they are depressing. All people care about is looks, looks, looks, looks. Gender bashing. Sex talk. (Sure we all like sex and good looks, but still) no substance. It' like looks are all dang important. It malkes my confidence level drop more and more. Really wonder if I'm even good enough anymore for a woman.

People say it isn't all about looks with attracting women. Sure everyone is different. But there really is no definite answer.

Yes it's dumb to let a website destroy urself self esteem. But many guys on there have no luck meeting anyone.

Do women become ultra demanding in wanting the best looking guy to meet off the net? Yes attraction is one thing but does a guy have to be a perfect 10?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • That website is a cesspool. Particularly if you don't live in a densely populated area.

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What Girls Said 16

  • I just joined PoF after resisting for months. I am talking to several men and I went on a first date just tonight. I have met many guys on Match, too. It is what you make of it. I have no unrealistic expectations and I try to shoot within my league because I know how these work. Online sites have only a pic to draw some one in to read the profile, so if the attraction isn't there to a degree people won't click. I know many men each day left-swipe (reject,) me based on profile pic. You have to be patient and realistic. Those hot guys are getting hit on by cute, younger girls and I can't compete. This is what I meant by shooting within my league.

    I know many people who found love on those sites. I am still seeing the first guy I ever met online x4 months (still haven't defined it yet though). I am learning the ropes and getting more out of online dating now.

    Be patient and open. You never know. :)

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  • GAG is supposed to be a site where we can be honest; it's not really a dating site, it's a site for opinion.

    Most women, including myself, think personality is the most important. But it is not the ONLY thing that matters. Women also have their preferences. They can show them and speak of them, but preferences are what we prefer, but not always go by. We can accept different people.

    Believe me, from what I see on here I think I'm also not good enough for men, but meh, what'll happen will happen. To be a 'perfect 10' you just need to meet the person in real life, see how they act. On the internet it's impossible to rate someone 10/10 unless they're really some sort of greek god, moreover people's tastes differentiate.

    So appearances are also important. Both genders are hypocritical.
    img.pandawhale.com/...an-eat-me-gif-Break-jcNo.gif

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  • Lol they are all like that these days, i've been on 4 of the most popular dating sites a few years ago and every single one are just swimming with horny men... i no longer try to meet guys online because i saw this loll waste of my time.

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  • Lol, I met the love of my life on that website a little over a year ago, so I can't really complain about it

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  • Dating sites make my faith in humanity drop!! Be sure that guys are as more demanding as girls ! My opinion is : if you're going on sites to start any kind of relation you should lower your standards from 10 to 7. And see what's life has to offer you outside your standards

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  • I am tired of them too. I have been on pretty much every internet dating site there is. And they are all depressing. I'm going to take my chances in the mean streets I guess. *sigh*

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  • I hated that site so I got off of it. It is extremely depressing and people can be shallow. I hated the whole concept of the site. You're much better off meeting someone in person than meeting someone off that site and meeting up in person. Also, people aren't always truthful when they're hiding behind a computer or phone. So it's easy to find a lot of liars & fakes on there. Best of luck

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  • I had pof and personally i didnt look for a guys looks i cared about their personality and if they were outgoing and down to earth .

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  • Guys don't have to be a perfect ten. To me it's more about compatibility and trustworthiness.

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    • I will say that I also have had bad experiences with creeps on that site though too. I stay off of it now. I think it's because it is free. I'm just not willing to fork over money though for something i could just as easily do by going out in public for free.

    • Define comparability.

    • Whether or not we have the same interests and morals, or outlook on life. As I am a responsible person, I would be compatible with someone who is also responsible etc.

  • The reason for this is that the people on POF are all on fuck buddy sites. Everyone is shallow and up for it on there!

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  • Online dating sucks, I suggest meeting people in person with similar interests, because online dating really is mostly about appearances first.

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  • Yea that site blows!!!

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  • I haven't even thought about this being dating site... for me this is normal, just like yahoo.

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  • Not at all. Not2 be conceited but Im very pretty. So it's not like I'm ugly or desperate. I honestly wouldn't want someone who's ugly or obese (cause I think hm they probs don't take care of themselves and have poor self esteem") but I look for a good sense of humor. Studying human behavior it seems that we really look for humor and confidence. If youre confident that's really the sexiest thing ever. I also like someone who doesn't take things too serious, is good natured,smart, and nice.

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  • Looks are important though when it comes to those sites. You're fooling yourself if you think otherwise. If you're unattractive, stay off dating sites. It's that simple. Meet women offline.

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    • I know. I get it. And it's unfortunate. Just wish women would be more open minded.

    • They should be yes. I didn't use online dating at all when I was looking for someone. However I've heard only bad things about them and how it's only a beauty contest. It's not just women on those though. One of my guy friends who uses it only messages the hot women even though he's basically average himself. He'd never consider looking at the other women, but my sister is the same way. She's average as well (we both are) and she'll only reply back to the hot men. It's just human nature I guess, which is ridiculous. My fiance and I met at a party and it had nothing to do with looks. He was amazed by my Wii skills believe it or not. He wanted to get to know me after I beat him, and we've been together ever since.

  • Always blaming someone or something for your lack of love life is pathetic.

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    • Since when did I?

    • Hmmm, the dating site is a joke, people only care about looks, gender bashing or only want to talk about sex. The website destroys my self esteem. Women seem to only want 10's and are ultra demanding.

    • And as per your comment below, women are not understanding enough.

What Guys Said 16

  • POF is the Walmart of internet dating: the biggest and most well known and full of freaks. Normals are there too, but they're hard to find.

    Try OKC, it's generally much better. I've had much more luck on there and the people generally seem to be nicer and more intelligent.

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    • There's good and crazy people on both sites. All comes down to the person. But I agree okcupid is better.

  • I used it because a friend recommended it. He said he got sex and sexual favors off of it all the time. While that wasn't my thing I still gave it a trial run and the results were disastrous. I deleted my account and have sworn off Internet dating. Too many issues appear when you go outside the regular mediums for meeting people.

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  • I know a few people who lived in the middle of nowhere who had luck with PoF. Anyone I know actually dating in the city I was in had terrible luck with the people on free sites, and much better luck with paid sites.

    I think tbh, a big part of it is that a lot of people on free sites are just looking for ego boosting. You gotta really want ego boosting to pay for a paid site vs. free site. So generally the people on the paid sites - male and female - really were looking to date.

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  • I've used it as well as okcupid and what pisses me off is that women have their guard up due to some guys sending nudes and dirty messages making it harder for everyone else.

    It's like you gotta scrutinize every word you say or else you're screwed

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    • I'd also like to add that people say online dating is the easy way out and that couldn't be anymore wrong. First off, your online presence isn't the same as in person. 2nd, you're dealing with even more competition. If you're a decent looking girl, chances are you're at least getting 20 messages a day. When you date a person off there very early on, you can't just assume you're the only person they're seeing/talking to.

  • I hear you. Dating sites are as full of shallow people as shallow as the ones in High School. You want to know how to find a real Women? Go outside! There are so many amazing people. Introduce yourself, and you will quickly let people see the real you :)!

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  • I'm more a tinder kind of guy. Just swipe away for a couple hours and watch the matches come in. You gotta look studly though... that helps ;)

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  • it'd be like dating someone here. gross.

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  • i can see that there are a lot of girls who are full of themselves

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    • Some are and there's quite a few who are very sensitive to what you say. We could be talking for a few days and when I ask a simple question about their interests, them, anything, they quit talking to you.

    • yeah that sucks

  • Okcupid is legit.

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    • You have to answer a bunch of questions to get good matches, but it's worth it.

  • No you don't have to be a perfect 10 just find someone and start a conversation if they like you you'll be able to tell right away and if it sounds like just friends then you just made another friend ??good luck dude

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  • I hate that site

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  • Internet dating is just a bad way to meet people for dating. It's impersonal and not even remotely close to what real life is like. It's really easy to be fake and lie. Most of the attractive women are single mom's who haven't gotten it in there head yet that having a kid makes you less desirable and they can't get what they used to get. Internet dating becomes more reasonable as you age, people become more realistic and accept people's flaws.

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    • This May sound shallow but one thing that's pretty common is girls lying about their weight and taking misleading pictures and then they're a lot fatter in person. Now appearance isn't everything and it matters to an extent but if you're fat, don't lie about it because you can't hide it in person.

      Online dating is kind of a joke though at least with pof because you're right it forces the idea of a relationship and you're dealing with so much more competition than in real life. n

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    • Yeah totally and it's much easier for people to put up a front and act completely different in person.

      Have you had any luck with those sites?

    • A few... awful dates. But like the question asker said, it's depressing to be on that site. I'm much happier not giving a shit, and not having an account on pof.

  • Let's break this down a little:

    You say "all people care about is looks, looks, looks, looks." Could this be true? The VAST majority of people are married by their mid 30s. So that's going to include a TON of people of average or below average attractiveness who are married. And that's not even mentioning those who are in relationships or successfully dating. So clearly, looks isn't ruling anyone out of a relationship.

    Next you say "Really wonder if I'm even good enough anymore for a woman." Here I think the issue is if you're REALLY honest with yourself you aren't looking for "a woman." You're looking for "a HOT woman." This is not the same thing. All those people in relationships I mentioned earlier? Yeah--most of them aren't hot women or with hot women. Those girls are RARE and the guys who get them are equally rare. THAT isn't easy.

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  • There was a study on OKCupid about women's perceptions of male attractiveness where the website asked women to rate a whole bunch of men.

    The result? 80% of men were considered "below average" looking--a mathematical impossibility.

    So, it COULD mean that women's expectations of men are wildly based on fantasy and completely out of touch with reality. It COULD mean that women are obsessed with only the best looking men. It COULD mean that women, regardless of how attractive (or unattractive) they are only want the best men.

    But it also could mean that women online have such a wide selection of men to choose from that they have absolutely no personal connection with or investment in that looking at the best men is kind of a "why not" sort of thing. If you only have a picture to go on--why be attracted to anything less than the most attractive? Maybe online dating just isn't analogous to dating in the real world?

    Your best hope? Get your ass out the door and ask real world women out on a date. Suffer rejection, learn what you're doing wrong, fix it, and keep at it.

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  • I must have passed in the looks department but when I refused to hint about how much $$$ I make they seemed to lose interest

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  • I get plenty of messages and some dates but all of them are liars about what they really look like or who they are.

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