Can anyone give me a sincerely good answer to why being a player is so bad?

What's so bad about a guy being a player? The guy gets to have fun with lots of girls without commitment? In all honesty if the guy is good enough why shouldn't he do it?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • From a male's perspective, it's not. But for a female, we are looking out for our own best interest. A male player threatens our desire for a monogamous relationship, and from a biological perspective, creates doubt that he will be faithful to us and our future children.

    I don't hold it against a guy that he was a player in the past as long as I sense he's changed and desires a committed relationship now. If I sense any desire to maintain the player lifestyle, I'll just move on and chalk it up to different wants/needs. Also, as a woman moves out of teenager/college age, she's likely been burned by players enough times that she's more guarded. So a man with a promiscuous past is less likely to break through her walls.

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    • I don't blame women for being weary either.

What Girls Said 7

  • It is because you are hurting people in the process, it's not honest or right to do in any way... people value a good and stable relationship where the people they are with won't lie to them or cheat... everyone wants someone to be their 1 and only... so being a player is just you messing us around.

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  • Nothing inherently wrong with it, but the problems begin when the guy actually wants to settle down and doesn't know how- happens all the time. He'll find the right lady and then treat her wrong because he's so used to playing women.

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  • Players don't seem to be trustworthy. They jump around too much. Love a girl for a month or so then dump her and get another girl the next day.

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  • Casue you might reach that point where you actually fall for a girl but she just sees you in the player way?

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  • I personally don't think its a bad thing. As long as you're honest and upfront about it...

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  • I think it is bad because it actually gives the guy an inflated ego and unfortunatley just because women have sex with you doesn't mean you are a great catch. It is a very empty place to be in the long term which is why women don't think it is good.

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  • It's not a bad thing

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What Guys Said 6

  • because it poisons girls against guys who are not that way. it leaves them distrustful, argumentative, and honestly, i hate players.

    i was lead on by a girl a very long time ago. i got fed up and moved on, but she didn't, and i had to tell her off. her man decided to try to fight me, thinking i was in some way disrespecting her or him. it was huge drama. sum the story up, i had to break his jaw before he got the point that i wasn't interested in her at all, and that she was a player.

    he died later that year trying to same thing to another dude. it was a shame, as by this point the girl in question had children by him.

    dont play. be real. thats what a real man does. players are the bane of every realationship.

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  • In today's honor-less society, one can't really condemn it. Women casually date/sleep around with as many men as they please in their teens/early 20's, then expect to be wifed up with a partner count of 10+ when the wall starts approaching...

    Society will not condemn them having their fun... what right does it have to condemn men for not then playing the role of provider to a woman who has been with many men?

    However, that doesn't change the fact that both lifestyles are bad for society. A man being a player is as bad as women slutting it up in their youth.

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    • I think a large problem is we've forgotten a simple truth... someone has to compromise, lest the baser instincts of each sex ruin us. Women want alpha fucks beta bucks, and men want to sleep around without committing...

      I do dare say, women were the first to change. The bargain was the marriage/family deal of the 50's and such, but that wasn't good enough. Women wanted to be freely hypergamous.

      The problem is for them, we men aren't stupid. We adjust. Today, marriage doesn't even offer men the promise of sex--just look of the public response to "Spreadsheet Man." It was widely cried "women don't owe men sex!" And such.

      We are smart enough to realize--when marriage, with all it's legal risks, no-fault divorce, doesn't even offer the promise of regular sex--it's a fools deal!

  • Players use deceptive and manipulative means to get what they want without a care for the people they hurt.

    Though in fairness today their task is made so much easier when girls choose to make themselves an easy target.

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  • The only thing bad is hurting girls emotions and then other guys have to deal with their baggage and drama. The pros outweigh the cons lol. Especially banging

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  • Cos people get hurt and that can lead to self confidence issues

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  • Cause if there's a girl you like, it can hurt your chances of being with her when she finds out.

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