Should I believe him?

I'm adding some facts to a question I asked earlier. I'm 15 and I'm dating a 17 year old. We've been dating for 10 months and I like him a lot. We talk about our futures together. I see him as a long term relationship(as in into college) but the problem is I don't know how he sees our relationship. I mean we talk about sex but I'm just not ready for that but he's 17 and I'm afraid that he will leave me or cheat on me if I don't give him what he wants. He says he loves me and he wants his 1st to be me. I don't even know if I would be his 1st. I really want to believe that he loves me like he says but I'm afraid he just wants to have sex with me.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Hun, don't do it. You're not ready. If he really cares for you, he won't make you do something you don't want to do. If he leaves, he leaves. There are other guys hun! Don't do something that you don't feel comfortable doing. Sex is not something you do because you like each other. If he keeps trying to make you feel guilty like saying if you loved him you would, or stupid stuff like that, break it off with him hun. There are lots of guys who are only interested in sex. And to be honest, if a guy like that isn't getting it at all, or as much as they want, they will go to where they can get it. And I'm not saying that this guy is like that, but it is very possible. Don't do something that you will regret hun. And never be afraid to say no and stand up for yourself. If you need more advice, send me a message.

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    • Thank you so much! I've been worried sick about what to do. I really needed a little encouragement so I knew I was doing the right thing.

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    • Ha ha, lol well thank you. I'm glad you like it! Lol your question you asked has turned into an IM session.

    • I will just send you a msg ok?

What Guys Said 6

  • First off, if you really think you can and will have a serious relationship with a man and NOT have sex be it once or hundreds, you are dreaming. But you haven't told us what YOU want. Do you want everything: dating, love, sex, possible marriage? Or do you just want a friend?

    Secondly, your information is rather vague. How long have you been dating? What kind of dates have you been oh? How old are the two of you? And what your feelings are for him. Without this info, very difficult to answer your question.

    Not every man will tell a woman he loves her even if it's just for sex.

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  • It's hard to say if he really does have those feelings right now. But, you shouldn't worry about him leaving if you don't have sex with him.

    As far as college goes, when he gets to college while you are still in high school, he'll meet girls there, and he'll probably date them, maybe even go to bed with one. I'm sure you don't want to be cheated on.

    You should talk with him about these things to learn what's in his head, and also tell him what's on your mind. Don't let yourself be afraid to ask him.

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  • There's not enough information here to help you much. . All I can say is, when a girl has the feeling that he is just trying to get in her pants, the majority of the time she is right.

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    • I completely agree. If you think he's insincere, drop him and move on to someone who will be. Don't waste your time, emotions, or affections on someone who isn't worth it.

  • I'd go with your gut feelings-you're probably right! Getting a virgin is what the majority of all men/boys want. Be honest-did you tell him you were a virgin or did he ask? Should really try not to mention that to anyone for -i believe-it only puts a big target right between your thighs. You as a person really don't matter any more-it's just trying to get your virginity that matters now and they will say whatever it is they believe you want to hear-don't get fooled by a stiff one.

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  • How long have you two been together. If not very long, and he's saying I love you, then that should be a red flag. Either he has issues, or he just wants in your pants.

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  • Two years is not a big deal, IMO.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Well first off how long have you guys been dating? Second, if you think he has alternative motives then the best way to test that is to hold out. If he sticks around then you know it's about you, if he leaves then you know that's all he wanted in the first place and you are better off.

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  • Trust your instincts. If he is like most guys his age, he will say anything to get sex, and that's what is probably going on here. I agree with LostAndConfused -- your best bet is to hold out, and see if he sticks around. Good luck!

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  • Its kind of hard to answer this question with out knowing if he is two older like you 18 and he is 20 or you are 19 and he is 21. The small gap btw teens and your early twenty's is a lot of maturing and dating experience you know more of what kinda of guy you want if you're gonna get jack around or not. Whatever you do just take what experience you got from this and learn from it.

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  • Listen to your heart, since God gave it to you, it is always right.

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  • If you have any doubt about having sex with him, then don't do it. Its something that you can't take back and something that you should only do when your 100% ready for and when you don't have any doubts about. & if he's pressuring you into it, put your foot down. Its something to be cherished and your still young, so I would wait awhile if I was you.

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