Who pays for the date?

If your on a date with a guy and he says lets split the check, how would you feel about it? Some guys don't like to pay for the first date because some girls are serial daters :/


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Most Helpful Girl

What Girls Said 47

  • I'd pay for my meal but I would think less of him and keep my options open. Sorry but if u just assume I'm automatically a serial dater, have bad intentions and don't know when a woman likes u then u might not make bf material. A lot of guys who have these attitudes in my opinion use it as a justification to be players themselves and date many women without having to "invest" in her. Yeah some girls are serial daterrs but time is money and I'm not wasting time going to dinner with u if I don't have an interest in u. Granted he's not obligated to pay for my meal, I just won't look on him as favorably as a guy who did.

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    • Totally all guys should think all girls are angels, so they the guy gets as screwed over as is possible

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    • So u think a guy is less of a "player" If he pays for your portion of the date?

    • Yeah. Most of the guys I know who just trying to use a girl for sex won't pay for a date, if he even invited her on one but that's another story lol.

      Sorry but no ones comments will ever make me feel it's acceptable to go Dutch with a new guy! Nope! That's not how men treat someone they value.

  • If he is the one who gave me the invite I would expect for him to pay the entire thing.
    It would turn me off to know that he wants to split the bill.

    When you're dating someone... you try to leave them with good impressions.
    I like old fashioned men.

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    • You like getting beat witha stick too? How about not working not voting having nothing that belongs to you - that be fun? Not having any rights to your kids no legal right over your body... I can see the attraction

  • I would be fine with it, in certain circumstances either he pays for all of it or half. But I personally believe that whoever asked the other person out on that date should pay. If the girl asked the guy out, she should pay the bill. If the guy asked the girl out, he should pay the bill.

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  • I don't see what serial dating has to do with it. Either everyine pays for themselves or whoever ask pays. Personally I orer for each to just pay for themselves. So that money is nota big deal. I don't want the date to be about getting paid for or paying I just want to use the time to get to know sol eleven.

    If I go to pay and he ash an issue with it I'll think he's exist and I won't see him again. It's not that I think his intentions Are bad. not all sexist people are malicious... I just won't get along with a guy who has issues with a woman acting like an adult human being. or thinking that being respectful toward me somehow involves taking away some natural ability i I possess.

    I don't mind him offering bc he may just not know any different. But if he has an issue with my paying it's just a deals breaker.

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    • It's the difference between somoe offering to pay bc it makes them feel good to treat someone and someone insisting on paying bc of their sex and mine.

  • Depends on the girl and each sides finances. Me personally if it's dinner and finances are equal I kinda rather pay for my own because I feel less awkward and I am not as concerned about the price. If it's something with a set price like a movie I would like it more if the guy paid simply because it shows he cares enough about the date to invest in it.

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  • Some guys are assholes who think you owe them sex just for paying for your meal so I would tend to pay for myself. My first date with my boyfriend he was a bit late because of traffic so I bought his movie ticket just to make sure and when he got there he bought the snacks. Now it's been 9 months we've been together and I mean we don't keep it exactly equal because that's ridiculous but it just kind of works out like sometimes I will just be like "Oh I've got dinner today" and he might tip or vice versa. After he bought me an iPhone6 for Christmas though you better bet he'd get the stink eye if he tried to pay for the date I know that phone was fucking expensive! haha

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  • personally I think the man should always pay if they are in a romantic relationship. it's just my opinion but I thin the man should be the aggressive and dominant one and I understand why you don't want to pay for the first date, but is it really thattt much of an expense?

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    • Well, paying just for the first date is not a problem, but if you gotta pay every time you go out with her, during, god knows how long you're together, you can spend a huge load of money, and if you're a student, money is not something you have in abundance.

    • yeah I totally get that. I definitely think he should pay for the first one. if he has a budget maybe they could work something out for the rest of the time because it's not fair that the man should always have to pay. but I think he totally should on the first date

  • When I go out with my boyfriend I always have money to pay my own drink and food. I don't think it's right to expect from the man to pay. If he wants to, it's appreciated, but it's not necessary.

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  • I'd be okay with paying half. I wouldn't mind it at all. I don't know why it's such a big deal to people. Why should the guy pay for everything every time? As independent women, we should be able to carry our own.

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  • Meh, the guy because if not then he looks cheap and stingy. Yet once they’re actually in a relationship or going on dates all the time, they need to be taking turns otherwise the girl looks cheap, stingy, and golddiggery.

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  • I would be more than happy to pay if we both mutually planned the date and both really wanted to go. I wouldn't think any less of him. I want equality between the sexes, I work so I will pay for my own shit!

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  • Its the best solution.. the check should be always split

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  • In all honesty, I feel like a lot of women have it built into then that a man should pay on the first date because of what we've been taught and everyone, even guys would be thrilled if someone offered to pay for you, because it's a sweet gesture. That being said, it is certainly not necessary and not fair for the girl, not only to assume that the man will pay, but be angry if he doesn't. I think splitting the bill is fine. I would NOT be mad. Though I once dated an guy who paid for my movie ticket and then asked me to pay for the snacks, which was like 3X The amount, and I just wanted to punch him in the balls. Never dated him again.

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  • Actually my boyfriend and I split the money on our dates. Sometimes I pay for one date and then the next he pays for it. So it's financially even.

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  • If I asked him out on the expensive date I'd pay.
    If it was him who asked I'd just pay for my own shit. Not his.

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  • You go Dutch (each pays their half)! If you want to pay for the whole thing, just take them out for a special occasion... Otherwise, 99% of the time you just pay your half. Oh, and another idea if that if you two are doing multiple things that day (like movies and then dinner for example) then whoever wants to do their favorite thing pays for it, and the other person pays for their own pick.

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  • I would feel okay with it, especially if it's the first date, and the guy and I are still getting to know each other. It feels weird to have just the guy or just the girl pay for the whole thing, y'know?

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  • With my guy and I, doesn't matter and never has. We both pay sometimes.

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  • I Personally would split the bill just because I don't want the guy to feel as if he will be responsible for me. Or you know take turns.

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  • I feel on the first date that you guys should split the bill. If he offers to pay then let him pay but at the end of the say it shouldn't be his responsibility to pay for the whole check. Me being a girl I would love for a gentlemen to pay but lots of times that may not happen. Looking from a guys point of view, I wouldn't want to pay for a meal that wasn't mine definitely if she may not stay with me in the first place.

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  • First date? He should cover food or at least drive. If you are in a relationship I like to traid off responsibility, but I do like to pay every now and again at least.

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  • Depends on who asks who, if she asked well she should pay. If he asked, he should pay. Or just split.

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  • The traditional way is the guy paying it. She's definitely going to exoect that

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  • I wouldn't mind paying half as long as he lets me know ahead of time that way I know to have enough cash on me.

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  • Whatever would make him comfortable.. It's not about money anyway.. Dinners just a comfortable setting for two strangers to become acquainted anyway.

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  • Whoever does the inviting or just split it. I don't see a problem.

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  • I wouldn't mind use spliting the first date. It makes total sense. Than after we can take turns.

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  • First few dates split for sure. Once you start getting to really know someone I'd say taking turns

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  • I always split the check.

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  • Whoever asks the other person out pays! If you continue to date then I like to pay for the both of us well here and there. Especially if it's a new place neither of us have been to. No splitting the check!!! It's just effing weird!!!

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What Guys Said 42

  • I always insisted on paying for the following reasons:

    1) I usually would ask the girl out, therefor she is accepting my invitation.
    2) Paying for her is a simple gesture that communicates that she is special.
    3) First impressions go a long way.

    It's also important to pay discreetly, without comment or fanfare, so that the issue doesn't even come up. I usually excuse myself from the table as if I were going to the restroom and pay the waiter at the service station.

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  • I offer to pay. If she says it's alright and she can pay for herself, I will ask once more if I can pay for her, but if she continues to want to pay for herself, I'll let her. I personally think that is a good method, as you make clear that you would like to pay, but if she is uncomfortable with that as some women are, she can pay herself.

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  • First off i don't go on that many dates every month. When i do happen to muster the courage to ask a girl out it's because i feel we have some chemistry. In that case i don't feel bad paying because we'll probably have a good time hanging out. I see it as money well spent. I'm just speaking about the first date though. After that, i would hope we could take turns on splitting.

    HUGE red flag if she constantly expects you to pay. I mean if she won't even give you a half-assed' reach for the purse for cash... wtf?

    Most girls I've been out with were pretty good about contributing something. I would never insist on splitting on the first date, just seems cheap to me.

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  • Amen to that. Im one of those guys. Luckily I do intense research before any official thing is done. One good way of letting it known that the check will be split is to arrive Separately.
    Those damn serial daters...

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  • I always say let's split the check. That's something I establish before we go out. I don't like when someone expects me to do something just because I'm a man. cool I'm a man with the same types of responsibilities that she has. I have bills to pay mouths to feed I need gas in my car too. I think if you choose to pay the whole bill go right ahead. What would a woman just expect for me to pay just because I'm a man, this kind of tells me how she's going to react to the rest of our relationship so to speak.

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  • I would definitely pay for first dates. But i would appreciate if the girl tries to pay.. It's a sign of what person you are dealing with. As i said, there is no way to let her pay. Splitting on first date sounds awful to me. As a relationship goes on, i would prefer pay alternately...

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  • Well call me old fashioned but i always pay for the night out. Its the guy thing to do if you like or love the girl.

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  • I try to pay unless the girl wants to pay then I just let her pay next time but if that's happening then I always try and drive.

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  • BOTH

    BOTH should pay their own!

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  • I always pay

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  • I dont pay for dates because like you said its common now for girls to be dating a few guys. Im not paying for anything until she shows me she's worth a dime

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  • I did. But our first time, she bought the movie tickets before I could even pull my wallet out. It was a nice gesture, and I was cool with it but I handled everything else.

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  • & .. This is why you choose carefully on who you date. (kidding. a Little bit.)
    I always offer to pay, and if they wish to split it, I'll tell them to pay the tip.
    if they decline my second offer (the tip), then I humbly accept their offer to split the bill with me.

    xoxo.

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  • I always pay.

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  • Guy has to pay. Its important to wear the pants in the relationship, not leggings

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  • Whoever has more money to spend and has better income.

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  • I don't go on dates with guys

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  • Hey bro, you asked her out, you should pay. if she invites you, she pays, that's how it works. the asker is impressing the askee.

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  • Whoever wants to pay for it?

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  • I have always been told that men pay for the first few dates because that is the gentleman thing to do.

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  • I think as a rule of thumb whoever asks out the other should be the one to pay the tab. As in the whole tab. It's a date. As in a treat. If I ask someone out I'm paying and if they ask me out they're paying.

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  • gender roles are stupid. it goes by what the people involved want. I just find it practical to skip any awkwardness and do it the first time myself tho

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  • If I asked her out then I'd pay for the first date. After that never. I'd pay for my future kids food not for my girlfriend or wife's.

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  • Personally, I'd pay for the date if I am the one who approached.

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  • If I were you id offer to pay full then let her agree or disagree.
    Totally agree with pr3ttyBr0wn

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  • The rich one pays

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  • The guy if he asks but i would never ask a girl out for a date ever. just smack her ass then ask her back to yours

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  • If a oman makes time to go with me to eat or whatever I PAY i dont give a fig if its the woman of my dreams or my mom or sister thats just being a man!

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  • First date I always split the bill. I feel like I'm spoiling a girl if I pay for her too.

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  • I've never went on a date but splitting the bill is the only way I would do it

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