Are Men and Women really that different?

Hear me out. Have we convinced ourselves of a fundamental difference between men and women. Other than clear biological differences (even though we all start out as female in the womb lol) Do we all not want to be loved, shown affection, hugged, respected, and understood? Do we make things harder than they need to be when dating someone? I mean there are minor preferences and individual differences but perhaps we've bought into our social roles so much that they have become a part of us? Maybe the cause of our misery? Just thoughts. What do you think?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Couldn't agree more.

    One of the things I love about GaG/communication through writing instead of pictures/video/in person is that it somewhat forces you to get into people's minds, thoughts and a decent view of their psyche.

    I like this because people can be a little more honest, take otherwise socially unacceptable pauses to think things over and communicate fully without trying to adapt their body language to match the message being said.

    I have learned from prior relationships that relationships in general are not worth pursuing unless you can be relaxed, honest and satisfied with the mind/body of your partner. Otherwise, what's the point? Relationships should be about growing, learning and being mutually beneficial to each other. They should be a source of strength and power, not despair and regret.

    Like you said: all of us want to be loved, shown affection, hugged, respected and understood. Even the absolute WORST of humanity wants that at some level, but they have most likely been through more pain and suffering than the average man/woman could bear. So understanding and trying to connect with someone vastly different than you can literally make all the difference in the world.

    Big fan of yours, really like your spoken-word style of rapping/overall connecting with your audience.

    Keep doin' you!

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What Girls Said 10

  • We are all the same. If guys genuinely care about me and are honest I can tell. Everything else is bs. It all depends on who you hang out with and as with many things in life you can not be lax about that. Men think they can get away with it because society let's them. They know gender roles are bs. Again if they care it will be obvious because men and woman are the same. The need for love creates all characteristics. And as for girls I'll tell you it all depends on who you hang out with. I can only vouch for me and guys. Girls are other peoples experiences. Since we are talking about gender roles all I can talk about is the opposite sex and my many friends that are girls just like me.

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  • I agree 100%. Gender issues would be totally eradicated if people stopped placing such strong emphasis on perceived differences between males and females and just focus on the fact that we are all fundamentally human. The difference between males and females (besides obvious reproductive ones) are so slight and insignificant yet blown way out of proportion. There's so many unfair and baseless stereotypes placed on both genders. It's idiotic but at the same time deeply ingrained in many.

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  • yeauh i agree, in many aspects we're quite similar, yet we just portray that in different ways.

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  • Yes, I think we complicate things because of our perception in the roles we think we should be playing. We tend to forget the basic needs we all have on an emotional level. Although, I do think as men and women we do process and communicate differently...

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  • no there really not i can never figure out why people think this. i have many guy friends and many girl friends and i dont see that big of a difference except the obvious. its all about each individual person.

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  • I'd say that men and women both tend to make things more complicated than it should be. Be yourself, if you like someone tell them, if you don't break up with them. If you are a women who likes to make the moves than do so. I feel like there shouldn't be a role anymore now a days but unfortunately there is. Unfortunately people are stuck in this "hook up culture" more than ever so people are afraid to tell each other what they really think.

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  • Hormones also have an impact on behavior, but yes social upbringings and situations do make men and women seem much more different from eachother then how they tuly are, in my opinion.

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  • I do not think we are different in our basic needs, I do however feel that the way our needs are fulfilled are Very different.

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    • I'd like to add, as far as "gender roles" goes, I think like everything else it's about moderation. Some things we can both do, n it's about who has time to get it done.. N that's okay, he's not afraid to do dishes. On the other hand I'm a very independent woman and he is a very independent man, neither of us want to feel like a burden to each other we have a need to be needed, to have purpose in each other's lives.. Etc... So needless to say when he gets home from work to find I need his help because I can not physically do the things he can he is all smiles n happy to take care of me

  • We are all shallow
    We all want love
    Nobody wants to get hurt
    We all want and need the same wants and needs

    We are just portrayed differently.

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  • Men and women are different in that every human being is different. A lot of that comes down to nurture and the environment we were raised in.
    I agree that it's silly to try and put people into gender stereotypes or just stereotypes in general. Be a man, or act like a lady etc are just comments based on ideologies of masculinity and femininity which from my experience fail to describe people and often lead to people trying to be something they're not and feeling bad about themselves because of it.

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What Guys Said 6

  • Gender roles are the reason we survived this far. While they may be becoming obsolete, we didn't "buy" into them. There IS a fundamental difference between men and women. We have different genitals, different predominant hormones, our brains are wired differently, etc. That doesn't mean there aren't more similarities than differences but we are definitely different albeit equal.

    You cannot argue that we are the same if there are clear biological and psychological differences.

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  • Men and women are incredibly different... for instance, dating. Women love to date older men, for a variety of reasons--and completely seriously. On the flip side, men rarely will seriously date older women.

    Or consider what we want in mates. A huge amount of women don't really mind if a man is a "player" or promiscuous--just look at all the questions about "can I convince a player to settle down" questions on this website. But men who find out a girl has been promiscuous in the past will seriously question whether they should continue dating.

    Careers. A man's status/money/career will seriously impact a woman's decision to date him or not. But men don't pause when considering a date and wonder "how's her career going?" Such as, in Big Bang Theory. No one stops to say to Penny "you're a loser waitress with no career." Because she's attractive and fun.

    Looks. A woman's looks are very important in considering attractiveness--but there's plenty of attractive girls out there with average or ugly guys... because women rate men on things like confidence, sense of humor, intelligence, career...

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  • I think it depends where you're coming from. I started out assuming there wasn't much difference.

    experience taught me that wasn't a great assumption. And the assumption we are the same when we aren't, that can cause misery too.

    I'd say that a lot of men and women would have the same ideal relationship. It's how they feel and what matters most when life's busy and things aren't perfect that varies more.

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  • We're not that different but stereotypes that tell people that, us guys are easier to please because all women have to do is cook and sleep with us while women are hard to satisfy because there's a book full of things a man must do, are taken to heart causing people to overreact.

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  • Do we all want to be loved, shown affection, hugged, respected, and understood? Sure.

    Are men and women different? Absolutely. Hugely different. Just look at all the questions on this site for proof of that.

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  • Needs are the same, biology AND psychology are different.

    Since men and women are human, it's obvious there would be overlap, no?

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