I don't want to leave off on a bad note as the last time I saw her, we didn't even kiss good bye.

I've been seeing this girl for the past month and a half and last night we got into a bit of a fight over something petty, but I think it exposed a bigger issue at hand. I am leaving to go to another country for 4 months, and I believe she had a pretty serious boyfriend that last up until 3-4 months ago. This is the text I got, and I need help figuring out what this means.

"To be honest I'm scared of commitment right now in my life. And it sucks because I really like you and I never expected this all to happen. It sucks that your leaving for 3 months, and I don't want to hurt you or lead you on because your one of the nicest guys I ever met and you make me smile all the time! but I'm just so confused and lost, and I don't want to come across as a stupid girl playing mind games because I'm not. I just don't know what I want.

there were a few small messages afterwards, but I stopped responding because I felt so upset over it.

I leave in a few days, and 4 months isn't a very long time, I feel like coming back to her when I get back. I don't want to leave off on a bad note as the last time I saw her, we didn't even kiss good bye. Should I even bother going and telling her how I feel before I go, or just let it be?

Updates:
I did what you suggested, we talked, and both agreed that when I got back we would re evaluate where we are. Hopefully all works out, but does anybody think that this is just an excuse until I leave, and when I get back there will be nothing?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No, go ahead on your trip and tell her that you both will catch up when you return. She needs to clear her head and assess what she wants. She is being honest with where she is at and it's a tough pill to shallow. However, you need to commend her for being honest and not leading you on.

    Take the time to enjoy yourself while you're away. When you return, catch up with her and see where the chips fall.

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What Girls Said 1

  • She seems really into you. Also, absence makes the heart grow fonder as in the old adage. I think she will still be interested when you return. Whether or not something comes of it will depend on her. Be strong, hold your head high, enjoy yourself on your trip and I hope when you return you send an update that you both got together.

    Good luck.

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What Guys Said 1

  • "I leave in a few days, and 4 months isn't a very long time, I feel like coming back to her when I get back. I don't want to leave off on a bad note as the last time I saw her, we didn't even kiss good bye."

    Perfect, and true. Try that.

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