Why I always end up with jerks?

I tried the be friends, only that, and end up getting hurt for a guy that texted me daily from the time we woke up till we got to bed. Tried the online dating and not talking about sex, tried the online dating and talking and performing sex, but always guys behave like jerks with me, guys that probably would be lovely with their girlfriends, why they are jerks to me? Is it something wrong with me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • perhaps it's not the approach to getting to know/flirting/interacting

    perhaps its simply the guys you find yourself typically attracted to and therefore interact with. maybe try to reflect on the guys you've been with. try to note any similarities in these guys that perhaps you can be cognizant of in the future.

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What Guys Said 5

  • I have a motto:

    "You can't stop someone from being an asshole. But you CAN hone your ability to detect one."

    A shrewd, observational person? They won't get fucked over by an asshole. Why? Because they have the mental tools to root out who is an asshole and who isn't one.

    Sharpen your tools. KNOW what to look out for in a genuine human being. Actions and sacrifice prove a person's worth far more than cheap words.

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  • Maybe jerks are secretly your type. Maybe its cause the super confident guys know they can get any women therefore dont stick around. Not to be mean but it could be partially you thats the problem. Lots of users in this world i haven't found a loving significant other or a loyal friend in awhile. Sometimes i feel the only person you can be sure thats got your back is yourself. Best of luck i hope you find a good man that treats you right ;)

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    • I guess you're probably right. Usually good guys are not as confident as jerks. And that is why I might end up feeling more attracted to them. Besides I'm in a place where I don't look for a super serious relation, but I still want to be respected.

    • I'd like to find someone to be in a relationship with but at this point i'd settle for some good sex on a regular basis. I'm more of a good guy than a jerk and girls dont like that i guess... tired of trying to be honest i feel like giving up entirely

  • There is something wrong with you -- you keep picking guys who are jerks. But you can get over this. Maybe try not sleeping with them until you find out if they are jerks or not. And I don't think the jerks you are meeting are nice with someone else. In my experience people are pretty much jerks or not. But some jerks can be nice to people for a while if they want something in return.

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  • Because you tolerate it and allow them to
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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    • So, is always my fault?

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    • *allowing* not slowing >_<

    • Yeah, I understand what you are saying...

  • because jerks are cute.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I believe this is more common than it should, I always end up with jerks too, we need a help group or something... What has worked for me is to find whatever that I'm doing wrong and accept that is my fault to allow this to happen to me. I've gained more confidence and self-esteem since I understood that I have the control of my love life and that no one else does. Also, maybe is the kind of guys that you are approaching, try to change that, I was used to a kind of guys and thought that kind of guys were the right ones for me, I started talking and seeing other people, really different, and noticed that I liked other things. Get out from your comfort zone, but don't let them be jerks at you. Is hard but you can do it.

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    • We should make a group! And is hard, but is lile I never learn from my mistakes. Always end up with the same people...

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    • I know. We can really learn from our mistakes, we just have to try.

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