Here's the deal,
I've been "seeing" this girl (i'm 20, she's 18 by the way, and i will nick name her J) for the past 4 months (October-Now). She has an ex who she said she remained good friends with. No problem honestly. What IS a problem is these points (in chronological order)
-2nd time i ever hung with her, i asked her how her jr prom was. she said "yeah my boyfriends prom was pretty good". i didn't correct her or think much of it. just kinda weird she didn't say "ex"
-on Facebook her female friend commented her photo and said "damn girl lemme tap that ass, (ex) doesn't need to know" and J (girl im dating) flirted back with her female friend
-this caused immediate suspicion, so i confronted her on who (ex) is and she told me (ex) is her ex boyfriend and they remained good friends
-i decided to check out (ex)'s Facebook. His relationship is still listed as "in a relationship" (since the time they started dating back then too)
-Additionally I noticed, on his time line, mid November he posted a "Life Event" which was "Met J"
Now this is weird, why would J's female friend jokingly try to make (ex) jealous? after all, it says he's in a relationship on FB. So either he's dating a new girl, but still has feelings for J, or they're still dating?
Here's what makes me think they're not dating
-A month ago, J told me she told her parents about me. a couple days ago i clarified by asking "they know we're dating right?" and she said yeah.
-before J met me, she hooked up with another guy (and obviously they didn't work out)
Anyway I was thinking about messaging (ex), and this would tell me what's going on completely. something like
"Hey buddy how's it going? Listen buddy I have no problem with you and J being just friends. Just wanted to let you know she's been seeing me now for the past 4 months. Again no hard feelings, just letting you know"
Thoughts on if she's a cheater, or if my message is a good idea?
- Message himVote A
- dont message himVote B
while grounded, a couple days later she told me she went out to a birthday dinner for her friend. then said she might sleep over. i said "uh your parents would let you despite being grounded?" and she said "yeah my parents know her parents"
she told me in the past, her ex's parents liked and knew J's parents