So 3 days ago I told my parents that I have a boyfriend (for the first time) and it was such a debate in my mind because I was so scared to tell them but, with the support and advice of my friends I got the courage and said "Mom, Dad I have a boyfriend we've been dating for 3 weeks and I think it's time I tell you." and the reaction I got was shocking. They told me I was too young to be dating and that boys at my age were stupid and unstable and that I should be focused on school and track yet Track practices haven't even started in my school district yet and my grades are the highest I've ever been. They also are huge hypocrites seeing as how they had their first child at 16. They haven't even met my boyfriend yet so how can they honestly jump to the conclusion that he's like everyone else. Sometimes I honestly get the feeling that they try to live their life through me and its the worst feeling to be told you're not allowed to be happy from your parents. I'm living with them until I graduate highschool and go off to college so disobeying them seems so rude to me after they've done so much but, is there anyway I can change their minds? They've been like this since my freshman year and I don't think I can take it anymore. What do I do?
- Yes, it's possible to change their mindsVote A
- No, they're set in their waysVote B
Most Helpful Guy
I've been in this situation before (Asian family and all). And all I can tell you is this girl.
There comes a time where you've gotta put your foot down and stand for something you believe in. BUT, just because you put your foot down, DOESN'T mean you have to do it in a rude way, in fact, it's CRITICAL you hold your ground with respect.
Make sure you know all the lessons they've tried to tell you and why, make sure they also know that your studies and your education self-progress is also first priority (don't lie, the truth of the matter is, they're right on this part, your growth and progress should come first).
Even if they flip out at you, they HAVE to understand that at the end of the day, your life is YOURS to live, NOT theirs.2