After seeing someone for a month, are we exclusive?

I have been seeing this girl for a month, we go out once a week and then she stays at mine for the night. I like her plenty, but I am abroad for 8 months and I recently had an opportunity with another girl and we have been texting.

The girl I have been with for a month knows I am leaving and we have never talked about 'us'.

What do you think? I have never had multiple options before

Oh no, I am abroad now. I will be going home for good in 8 months so ya... this whole thing is temporary, both of them. I would like to think I would act much better if I had a girl back home!


Most Helpful Guy

  • You'd best have the 'us' discussion, then, instead of making assumptions.

    I'm long-distance with the woman I'm seeing. We met online. I told her I didn't want her putting her life on hold for me (it'll be months yet before we can see each other in person), but we basically agreed to exclusivity - we'd both let the other know if we were going to start seeing other people. Several months in, neither of us has done so.

    • Thanks. I just feel like this shouldn't bother me, but it does. I just don't want anything committed right now, but I do like her enough to keep seeing her. I jsut see other guys dating multiple girls like it is no big deal, a bit envious...

    • Show All
    • Youth really doesn't change anything about the situation. Just take the time to consider what her expectations are and what you'll be setting yourself up for when you come back home to her. Better to define the terms of your relationship, or end it if it's over.

    • Be careful though - the fact that you're asking her will tell her you've found someone else. It would have been better to establish the terms of your relationship before you left.

      Honestly, at this point, you may be better off going one way or the other. Either officially break things off with her and pursue this other relationship (bearing in mind that it would be nothing more than a fling which will end when your time abroad is up), or find out whether she'll be waiting for you when you come back, and don't pursue things with the other girl.


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What Girls Said 4

  • If you're not sure, you should really talk to her about it. If nothing else. It will prevent misunderstandings and someone getting hurt.

  • How far have you gone?

    • as in sex stuff? We have had a lot of sex if that's what you mean. she pushed for it on date two.

  • If you've been going out for a month and you're about to leave, it sounds like you should talk to her about what she wants to have happen when you go.

  • I don't think you guys are exclusive


What Guys Said 0

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