Went on a date but rejected for my looks. How to not get too down?

So basically I went on a date with this girl and we both had a really good time but she told our mutual friend that she could see me as potentially a great friend but she wasn't attracted. It's fair enough but I am little disappointed obviously because it seemed to go really well.

Obviously I am little dejected but what I am trying not to get upset about is that she didn't like me for my looks. I knew she liked thin guys so I don't really get what is wrong with me. I am really unconfident about how I look because I used to get picked on for it at school so this kind of confirmed what I already thought of myself. If I find a photo of myself I will upload it but I don't keep any on my laptop.

Please help!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • My best comfort is that often physical attraction is just one part of overall attraction. I mean, I've fallen for guys before who according to others weren't physically attractive but yet for me they were cause they just had something and I saw something in them that others didn't. The same applies to you. Just cause this girl didn't see overall attraction with you doesn't mean no one else will! I've also been rejected for guys lacking attraction and overall chemistry with me and you shouldn't let it get you down. You can't be attractive to everyone out there. Besides attraction is not everything too. As I say, there are many factors that determine overall attraction. Beauty is also highly highly subjective. One person will love your appearance, another won't. That's why the dating game is a very tough game and you need to know that a few people rejecting you doesn't define you. You have to go through many people often to get to the right one :)

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What Girls Said 1

  • Honestly, I am sorry that that girl would go behind your back and do that. In my opinion, people are supposed to fall in love with one's personality first and looks are just a plus.

    If this date went really well, you never know- she could potentially become attracted to you later. By this I mean that she could fall in love with your personality and then your personality just makes you such an attractive person already. Judging on just this post, you seem like a genuine guy and I hope all goes well for you!

    If she doesn't come around, then she's just one of those girls who would date someone just for their looks and honestly, you deserve better then that.

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    • No, I don't have a problem with her telling her mate that though. Thanks as well by the way :)

What Guys Said 5

  • Nothing to do with your looks man. You could be ugly and still she may find you attractive. Just means there wasn't a spark in her eyes. Don't think it's your looks or anything you did wrong. You just got unlucky.

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  • Sorry to hear this, mate :L
    I guess these things happen and its important to know and remember that there are more fish in the sea, a lot more. I hope you find Ms Right one day mate, one day soon. I really don't know what to tell you Buddy, it's going to hurt but think about the future, think about how your going to change things for yourself for the better, not because other people want you too and when the right One walks past you'll know and you bloody well better take your shot, mate

    Good luck, Champ, I wish you all the very best

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  • Just keep having fun someone else will come along, that is if she doesn't change her mind because she has fun with you.

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  • She shouldn't have gone on a date with you then. Giving people false expectations is very mean. Hope you'll find confidence in yourself again bro.

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    • Apparently she didn't realise it was a date. I thought I was quite clear but she is quite naive according to her mate and I guess this proves that haha.

  • Drown your sorrows in booze.

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