How often do you talk about exes to current GF/BF?

So he brings up his exes from time to time. Never wishfully, never complains them, calls them names or whines, just in the course of a related conversation. I make it a point to never talk about exes, just not necessary in my point of view. I don't get the feel he still is in love with any of them, just that he is way more open about... well, everything... than I am. He brings them up the same way as his current friends' names, just casual and usually related to a conversation. I don't believe he is in regular contact with any of them, but hey, who really knows.

I get the feel it is harmless, but it is so annoying. So. Very. Annoying. I get he is with me, not them, but if I hear their names any more I will stab him in the eye with a spork. He likes that I am independent, secure and not a jealous type so I am a little unsure about telling him to stop.

Do you guys talk about exes? Is this worrisome?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'd never do that even a barnacle like me knows that's a terrible idea.

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What Guys Said 5

  • I talked about exes, just as surely as I talked about other people who helped make me the person I am now.

    In fact, I get worried about people who DON'T talk about their exes.

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    • That is what he said when I asked him about something I found in the bathroom; was a guest bathroom and I was carving out my chick niche in there and came across a girlie shampoo. I only asked if he needed it and he said it belonged to so and so, not his. Somehow we got on the subject and he made a comment about having nothing to hide. The conversation was no where near that blunt of course, but that was the gist of it.

    • More likely, the girlie shampoo is evidence of how little men care about what's in their bathroom than anything else. I doubt he gave it much thought until it was brought to his attention.

      I have cologne given to me as Christmas gifts in my medicine cabinet that are about 20 years old (I'm not kidding). Every year students give me cologne for Christmas (more than I use in a year) and it gets stockpiled. This is because I don't really think about what's in my bathroom... except my books. I have a bathroom library.

      "I was carving out my chick niche..."
      OMG! That's refreshingly honest and hilarious!

  • I enjoy talking about exes if she wants to from a past experience/learning perspective, but I don't enjoy bashing or dwelling on the negatives.

    I like remembering people fondly, whether I liked them or not.

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    • That's what he does. Never bashes them, just brings them up as casually as he does his friends' names.

  • Almost never, I don't bring up past relationships.

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  • I dont like to talk about exs unless she ask me

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  • THeir the top priority in talks

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What Girls Said 4

  • I talk about my ex but I try not to do so with my partner. My ex is 100% my best friend, and I love her as a best friend, but she has a new girlfriend now and we both see each other just as friends. So I personally think it's harmless, though I still try not to mention the fact she's my ex to anyone new in my life, I would just call her my friend instead in that case.

    I can see why it would hurt to hear about an ex though, and even though my case is probably uncommon I would definitely ask to get back with her if things didn't work out with her new gf. So I don't want anyone new having to be worried about that (even though it's true for me).

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  • I don't. It's like showing off and comparing the current gf/bf to the new one. I think it's rude and immature.

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  • It's normal just tell him calmly it bothers you and I'm sure he'll stop because right now he doesn't know that it does

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  • U should never talk about an ex to the current person u are in a relationship. It is seen as disrespectful. Or it can make the other person start to feel or think that u may still have feelings for them still. It can also be seen as u are comparing them to ur ex. All around its just a big no no. Focus on the fact u have his love his time and affection. Focus on u guys. N dnt worry about the past.

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