How long to wait for the 2nd Date?

I went on a first date on Friday (2/27), and it is now mid day Tuesday (3/3), but he has yet set up a 2nd date. If he continues to make conversation with me over text, should I just ignore him and write him off?

Background: We met over coffee and bagel dating app, it took him over 2 weeks to ask me out on the first date. He said he had a great time with me (we talked until restaurant nearly kicked us out), but I didn't feel like he enjoyed spending time with me, he didn't smile much and was very serious the whole time. It was an awkward date, at least for me. I like that he seems intellectual and reserved, cause I am pretty conservative, so wouldn't mind going on a 2nd date to see if we could be more relaxed and at ease with each other, but I don't want to waste time on someone that doesn't like me enough...

  • Continue to respond to his texts
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  • Write him off
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Most Helpful Guy

  • So it's been about a week since date #1 occurred if I read it correctly. It's not uncommon for a reserved guy as you described him as to not immediately ask someone out again. He may be waiting to get a read on how or what you did or didn't get from the date. I didn't find much from what you said that made me feel you enjoyed this date and maybe he didn't either , if he feels this way he may feel he would be turned down if he asked again. If you would like to try a second date , at least let him know that your open to it should he want to. Don't close a door too early especially if you may want in. Just my thoughts

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    • Thank you. I am actually disappointed. I brought and gave him some chocolates at the end of the 1st date since he picked a decent restaurant, when he said we should do this again, I said definitely and I respond to all of his texts since then... I just didn't say I enjoyed the date when he told me he had a great time, because I really didn't have a good time... it was way too awkward that he doesn't hardly smile. Not sure how else I could have show that I was open to get to know each other in a more relaxed manner...

    • Yea that would be awkward to say the least if he didn't smile. That type of person is hard to read.

What Guys Said 1

  • Why are you not setting something up yourself? You're complaining he doesn't seem interested, so you're responding to that by losing interest?

    Go out somewhere and do something - an activity, not another conversation.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Ask him out.. even if it's just something casual. You could say "i'm going to home depot to pick out some paint, did you want to help?" doesn't have to be that particular thing, but you get the idea.

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    • I think I will feel resentful if I have to plot something just to see him again... but thank you for the idea, because I do need help with some light bulbs, can't figure out the voltage and size of the head where it screws in, if he text again maybe I can use it as an excuse to prolong the conversation. If he is truly interested he would find excuse to see me... right?

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    • Hey thank you so much, your suggestion worked!!! :D After I try to explain to him my light bulb issue, he said he "can go with me," then I asked if I could tag along with him to a hardware store if he happens to go again, that is when he asked me out again and said we can go to hardware store afterward... do you think he knew I was plotting? LOL it is embarrassing... I shouldn't be this worked up over a guy I only met once (sigh)

    • Guys love to be needed, especially when it comes to hardware storeslol. No, I think what you did sounds completely natural. I hope it works out!

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