It kinda bothers me that he doesn't work out, help?

so i like this guy and he likes me, but he doesn't work out. I can't but ask myself, why dont he work out? doesn't he care about his health? I work out 6 times a week and i do a lot of strength training, and i love working out. So i can't rap my had around someone who doesn't like/want to work out?
Am i just being shallow or am i just being a bit picky? i don't know... help? lol

Updates:
Well i found out that i was kinda trying to find reasons not to date him, aka put myself in a new sitaution that out of my comfortzone. I haven't dated, ever, so this is new to me, he's a great guy, its like most of you said: not everyone likes working out..

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Most Helpful Guy

  • you two just aren't compatible in that way. there are in fact A LOT of people who can go their entire life being okay with not exercising or lifting weights. and they can still live perfectly healthy lives in the process. if he doesn't wanna do it you can't force him, trust me no one wants to be forced to pick up weights.

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    • ofc, im not going to force him, if he doesn't want to do it, thats his choice... but i dont know... i mean to be health you kinda need to work out... i dont expect him to have a sixpack and huge bieceps, but he should at least be active.. i dont know... i really do like him. soo

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    • i could try.. but at the end of the day if he doesn't want to be active or doesn't want to work out, its little i can do

    • true, in the end if he doesn't want too then there is nothing you can do about it but remember, change comes from within, if you can reach through to him to show him how much it matters to you that it would make the relationship more happy to be in then that may be all the motivation he needs and thus he may find a new joy in life, which is part of making you happy as well. the important thing is to not let him feel ashamed of how he chooses to live his own life, so you gotta work your way around that.

What Guys Said 15

  • working out has nothing to do with health

    i don't work out yet i'm healthy... and not everyone likes working out...

    so yeah you're picky, better admit it

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  • It depends on his diet. You dont have to work out to be healthy you can just eat well to be healthy.

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    • well you can be healthy to en extent i guess

    • You can be perfectly healthy probably not very strong but in this day and age strength is for laborers and sex appeal.

    • The less one eats, the longer one is likely to live.

  • It's just a compatibility thing lifestyle-wise. Some people are simply not that conscious about their health that intensely. They "live and let live".

    I used to be this way back in my teens, because my parents were never workout or health conscious growing up.

    I'm glad I broke that cycle. Unfortunately this guy hasn't. :(

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    • i guess not... but i really dont want to push it on him.. but i dont know if its going to work in the long run... he really do like him (first time i have met a guy i actually like and have contact with) and i dont want to just "give up" for something like that... i haven't really tried to make him go so i should just assume he'll never do it

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    • @Prof_Don GOLD and JEWELRY and everything expensive your words are ! lol

    • @TL-SG-HJ Thanks a lot for the compliment! :-D

  • People are going to have different hobbies than you. It's perfectly ok to hold out for someone who shares a few of yours but, you've got to realize that there's more to a good partner than being at the peak of physical condition.

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  • Wow talk about being shallow why can't you love or like a guy for who he is? Kind of like how women expect us men to like them for who they are regardless of their body type.

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  • I agree, basically, I work out three times a week, and I think it's important for your health.

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    • you're not really answering my question, but yeah

    • Well, I don't think you're shallow, I wouldn't wanna be with someone who doesn't like to work out either ;)

  • Oh, you are just being foolish - please stay away from him for his sake.

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    • lol, what do you mean?

  • Well it's going to affect him in the long-run so i understand why it bothers you. You're not being shallow in my opinion. You should suggest working out together to him.

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    • i actually did, but he told me he didn't like he gym...

  • Not everyone likes working out

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    • i know, but he should be doing something to benefit his health, right?

    • Personally i find working out very boring and thats why I struggle to do it

    • im not saying he need to go to the gym... he could be doing simple stuff as going for a hike or a walk.. i expect him to go to the gym 5 times a week..

  • Im so sorry that not all men look like brad pitt or David Beckham. We're not perfect so you can either deal with it or continue to wait for "prince charming" who only exists in your imagination.

    #DoubleStandards.

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    • i never said "i want him to work out so that he could have a sixpack", it has nothing to do with me not being satificed with his body or that i want to change it... I am attracted to him, and thats not going to change unless he gets seriously overweight or something. it has something to do with something called health...

    • Maybe he has his own way of being healthy. Maybe he does his own exercises at home. Maybe you could ask him to go hiking or swimming in that way it would be fun and healthy at the same time.

  • Tell him you won't have sexy time with him unless he goes to the gym with you. hehehe

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    • yeah, that will make things better, haha

  • Tell him if he goes to the gym with you, you'll have post workout sex with him

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  • i smoke one pack of cigarette everyday for 6 years and i dont workout ever i just dont care

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  • Sorry to say it and I don't mean it in a rude way but get over it. Not everyone works out even if it seems ideal.. Maybe if you started dating then bring it up but for some guys its a touchy subject.. It may seem weird to you because you work out and are probably an active person but not everyone is like that

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    • i know i know... but i dont know... he should be active for his own health sake...

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    • i could... but im not going to force him to do something he doesn't want to do... but working out is a big deal for me, and im planning to get stronger and stronger... so yeah.. dont know how happy he's going to be about that

    • Haha I don't know but asking him to go along can't hurt if it bothers you that much

  • Little off topic, but 6 times a week? Isn't that bad? Don't your muscles need recovery?

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    • its kinda controversial. I probably didn't make any sense but that's the only way I can put it lol.

    • well i run two times a week and strength training 5 times a week (once a week i do both) and i dont work out so hard that i get extremly tried or anything... but i am kinda working towards getting strong enough to compeet

    • What's your weight training schedule like, I'm kind of intrigued...

What Girls Said 2

  • You two just aren't compatible in that way. You'd probably be better off finding someone with a passion for the gym like yourself.

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    • i guess.. i dont know... ugh...

    • You're not going to force him into working out, and you likely won't inspire him for a long time either. So it's really only a matter if you can accept him for how he is or not. Some things are deal breakers, some things aren't. I don't consider you shallow for it.

  • Just because he doesn't "work out" or go to the gym doesn't mean he's not healthy nor does it mean he doesn't care about his health.
    I'll do at home workouts sometimes, but I hate going the gym.
    All I really have to do is move around and I'm set. Just walking around during the day makes me get toned.
    And if he really doesn't care and it's that huge if a deal to you, I guess you just aren't compatible?

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    • its not necessarly a dealbreaker because people are different, and people like different things... But i dont know... i do a lot of strength training so im just getting stronger and stronger, and my muscles just gets more visable.. and i might look "normal" now, but in time i will be more musuclar then him, and will he still find me attractive then?

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