I go around fearing he will dump me, help?

i go around with this fear that he will dump me? Im dating a guy for the first time, but experience wise i have been rejected once (i liked a guy a lot, but he didn't want to date me, but still dragged me along) and since my self esteem was and kinda still is low i really let those kind of stuff effect me.

He was the one to take contact (after i added him on facebook), and he told me he is really glad he met me, and he even kept telling my sister how fantastic i am. He keeps eyecontact while we talk, like all the time, he answers me straight away (facebook) and there are so many signs he does like me. I asked him if he wanted to grab a coffee yesterday, i asked if he wanted to grab it within the week (excluding the weekend) and he said yes, and i told him to tell me when he had time. But today i got a message from him saying it fits better this weekend because of car trouble... And that freaked me out big time, i feel rejected, and i still am and i guess a part of me takes it as a indirect rejection, most lightely because of the previous guy)(he would say he had time one day, then tell me he couldt go, but he could go the day after that or the week after that, but he no plans of actually hangig out.
I feel like crap right now, because i really like him and i dont want to get hurt again. What do i do? its not health to go around and think someone is going to dump you all the time (not all the time, but when i ask to hang out etc)


Most Helpful Guy

  • Youve answered this yourself. Stop avoiding the obvious

    • By the way.. this sounds like abandonement issues. Talking to someone about this may help answer a lot of bigger questions in your life. Then letting relationships like this won't be so hard

    • seriously? wow... i haven't been abandonement by anyone...

    • Its not always so obvious. As i said before.. consider talking to someone.. it can help answer other questions.

Most Helpful Girl

  • ... But today I got a message from him saying it fits better this weekend because of car trouble...
    Unless he keeps making up lame duck excuses here, dear, stop with your Fear, for he will get the not so helpful hint, even with a hymn or a haw, That-------Someone is going to dump you.
    You every right to feel paranoid at times when you feel someone, especially the one whom you are dating, is giving you an omen he may be dumping you. However, you have to learn that if you are with even a newbie, you have to stop jumping the gun, tell yourself that it Could very well be the truth and that if you continue down a wrong path of paranoia, it will end up a War of the Roses... you don't want to shoot yourself in the foot with these thoughts.
    Go slow with his flow. Nothing in life is a guarantee but death and taxes, as you well know. But if you are seeing someone, who seems to show he cares about you, either give him a chance for possible romance and hopefully get into a partnership or... let go and let God, you are not ready to let down your guard or take the plunge because you are scared "I don't want to get hurt again."
    Good luck. xx

    • Thank you, sweetie, for the Vote of Confidence, and Happy New year, dear. xxoo

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