How much weight can your significant other put on before you say something?

Just want to see where people stand on this. I'm not saying breaking up with them but when do you tell them they need a change.
This is for guys and girls.

Maybe you just don't care? Say it all below.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, the main thing for me would be her health, and I believe that if you approach it the right way you can actually make your partner feel supported rather than demeaned.

    I guess I'd probably ask her if she's okay if I noticed, like, say a twenty pound gain?

    For me, she could ask regardless of the number and I don't think I'd take it personally, provided that she approached with kindness and care. I weigh myself every week anyway, so I'd already know.

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What Girls Said 20

  • If he gains like 20 or so lbs I may notice and say something. If he gains like 40 or so I will ask him to exercise. If he refuses, I don't know if I'd wanna stay cuz I don't want him to be like out of breath every second. I'm a sloth so I guess it shouldn't bother me how much weight he gains. But if it's affecting even daily tasks like getting out of bed, I wouldn't like that.

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    • That seems fair. By the way even sloths deserve fit partners lol

    • I'm a skinny sloth lol But I don't know. If I'm not doing anything to maintain my weight, why should expect him? I'm basically "cheating" cuz I have a fast metabolism and it's nearly impossible for me to gain or lose a significant amount of weight. I know that not many people are like this and have to watch what they eat, do exercise, etc.
      Me being a sloth will not really impact my weight. My future partner, who knows? Which is why I say about 40 or so lbs.

  • Never cared about the weight. But it pisses me off when he needs to shop for new clothes cause of it.
    Clothes are so damn expensive! He doesn't even get the chance to wear them and he can't fit into them anymore. THE MONEY!!! WTHHHH! If you want to throw away money, just give it to me!

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    • What if he wore excessively loose girls to begin with and gained 200 pounds to fit it perfectly?

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    • Cause I rather spend my money on food than on a membership lol
      I'm bad enough that bf is proud of me for going to gym once a week haaaaaaa

    • Hahaha I like your thought process :P

  • I think it would be hard to put on weight if someone is having a relationship with me lol. Since I'd want to work out with him, cook healthy food and bring him to restaurants where only serve healthy food lol.
    BUT if he gain weight, I wouldn't say anything and just make him move around more and cook less calorie food for him, he would lose weight without noticing it lol. :D

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  • Well i love my boyfriend but if he start gaining weight that wouldn't be cool i would worry about his health i mean 5pounds is ok it might look good on him because he's skinny but getting all pudgy... not cute ill be like time to hit the gym babe lol like anything past 10-20 pounds is not ok time to workout and i would be very supportive 😊

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    • That's a good mindset. Would you be okay if he mentioned your weight gain? I know that can be a sensitive subject for people.

    • No i wouldn't get mad at all but if he start actually acting like he's not attracted to me anymore then thats a problem and ecspecially if he wants to break up. Then thats an even bigger problem... just be respectful about it and afterwards be supportive

  • a tiny pooch is ok, beyond that I'd probably surprise him with a gym membership or something. I'm sure he would take the hint. (:

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  • Well if they are a good weight and then gained 30 pounds, I would say something.

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  • When he starts losing things in his fat rolls is when I'll say something. Other than that I don't care because I'm dating him for his personality not his body

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    • That's a lot of weight to put on before you lose something in your fat rolls lol you're a brave one but I admire your dedication :)

    • I mean I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. My weight fluctuates a lot for no apparent reason so I guess I just don't judge based off weight because I know how that feels :)

    • I understand what you mean, you seem nice I'm sure whatever you tell him he'll know you care!

  • I probably wouldn't say anything cause I wouldn't wanna hurt his feeling, if I did I guess however much weight it took for him to be massive

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    • It's better to be mean than to say it too late where it's harder to take off.

    • True lol but I don't think he would let it get that bad, he likes to play sports so I think he would realize it if he couldn't play without giving out before it got bad lol

  • A calorie. YOU WILL NOT GAIN WEIGHT!

    lol. Eh I don't care until they become fat/chubby. I try to take care of myself and I expect the same from my partner.

    French word of the day? :p

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  • He shouldn't have a bear belly, triple chin, boobs, or overlapping love handles. Any other gained weight is okay

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  • ;O Is Sara gaining weight?
    Oh noooo!!!
    She's probably too heavy, you can't lift her anymore!
    Ohh myyyy. I'm so sorry.
    You should just tell her. Stop feeding her.
    Lock her in a room without food, just a tred mil.

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  • She won't have to worry, if I notice myself gaining anything I'd get rid of it instantly.

    For her weight though, I don't care. I'm more attracted to slightly bigger-than-average girls anyways.

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    • That's good but everyone has a limit surely a 100 pound gain in a year would be excessive?

    • I don't care. As long as any number increases aren't happening to me.

    • Well you're a rare one but I'll accept your opinion :)

  • The last time I said something, he looked like he put on 20 pounds.

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    • So a 20 pound limit.. at least you caught it early.

    • ummm tbh he probably didn't put on that much.. but rather a lot of his muscles went away and got replaced by tummy fat :/ he got injured and couldn't exercise anymore.. but continued to eat like he did.

  • If he sits on me and refuses to get off, I'll have to re-evaluate our relationship. #2muchweight

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    • Pshhh I'd sit on you :P
      As long as that finger of yours stays in plain sight lol

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    • WHAT THE HACK DDDD: NOOOOO, DAT UNEXPECTED FORESIGHT

    • Did you really think I wouldn't be wearing one... after you try to jump on me everytime you see me?
      I'm always ready :D

  • 20 pounds i think

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  • i live a healthy lifestyle so id have to find the someone with the same passion

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  • I would tell him as soon as I notice a difference cause if I let him gain the weight and then say something, it'll just be harder for him to lose it. If he doesn't gain much before I say anything, he would just have to watch his eating habits.

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    • Yeah it may seem excessive but it;s more considerate than see them gain a 100 pounds

    • It would honestly just be to help him out cause it's hard to lose weight. I would want to know right away if I was in that situation.

  • Alright sooooo the guy I have a serious crush on use to be considered obese that's before I knew him, now he is considered to be clinically overweight and I don't care. I could really love this guy if he'd let me. He is very attractive and I like his body. Well, from what I can see.

    But anyway to answer your question I'd say. . . 30+ would make me start thinking about things.

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    • I'm glad you saw beyond his weight that's sweet and I agree with your choice

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    • Haha you're awesome <3

    • Thankkks:)

  • 10 lbs in less than 6 months

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    • Would you even be able to tell the difference in 10 pounds?

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    • Oh okay I see your point now, you didn't say you were tired of it at 10 lbs but rather that you'd choose to tell them early on! I agree.
      Would you be mad at your bf if he said that to you? Some people get defensive.

    • It depends how he says it but I would be mad at myself for not noticing it first

  • Half a pound XD

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    • Well then I'd be scared to be with you lol

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    • Well I'm sure if you were watching it then he's in good hands lol

    • You know he is ☺️

What Guys Said 11

  • If her lifestyle is sedentary and/or I notice her eating excess carbohydrates, I'll keep a close eye on her. Habits are more important than weight.

    You can put on weight just by being stressed and having little sleep. Weight gain is expected at times. If she has the habits to overcome it, I dont have to say anything.

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    • Let's she doesn't overcome it, how do you approach the problem?

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    • At least you're with her every step of the way, I like that!

    • Nobody really WANTS to be a fatass, so its the only way to go.

  • You will get in trouble just or asking this question. Personally, when her behind gets broader than I can span with both hands, I say something!

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  • Considering it is supposed to be "healthy" to gain or lose two pounds a week, I'm willing to bet by week five (10 pounds) it would begin to be obvious that a physical change has occurred.

    It would depend on the reasons for weight gain. Sometimes people gain a couple of pounds for the better.

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    • I'm talking about going over the healthy point... how would you approach it?

    • Well, I find it kind of hard to believe that a bunch of weigh gain comes out of the blue. If they're not eating right (fast food/junk food all the time), then I think it would be relatively easy to bring up that you're concerned about them not taking care of themselves. Emotional eating, for whatever reason, would be a similar discussion.

      In the end it would never be a "You're fat, why?" conversation, but a "This is a not-so-fun occurrence, why is this happening? Are you OK with this?"

    • yeah I agree and saying you're fat why is never a good choice lol

  • 40-60 pounds. Be gentle but firm. If it becomes a big problem, let them know you're doing it because you care, and not because you want to oppress or hurt them.

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  • ahhh my question would work the other way round in my case, since i'm into chubbier girls :-P

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  • When they start turning into a sphere then I have to say something lol.

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  • When they find basic tasks exhausting.

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    • So at any point where the "lazy" factor takes effect or when they run out of breath from the stairs for example?

    • Bit of both
      like, if she had to take a break while we were having a short walk... I'd say something then

      Or if she was just like "I can't be bothered... This éclair is so damn amazing I'm not getting up" then I'd say something too

    • completely understand!

  • I'd only say something if she starts weighing more than me

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  • 5 pounds or more

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  • I'm physically fit if this is a long term thing then my girl is gonna be physically fit too.

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  • A few extra grams and she'll be put out to pasture.

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