Is he cheating?

my boyfriend and i live 30min. Away from each other and we only see each other 3 times a week. When he is not with me he don't text me and always seen busy... he doesn't ask me to come over more than the 3 days... i wonder if he is cheating on me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • 3 days is a lot to be seeing someone until you move in together... I only see my girl who lives fairly far away on the weekends, maybe once in the week as well, but only for a few hours.

    We both live busy lives and I am thankful we both think we are worth squeezing in to each others lives. To be honest though, I have dated girls who think my life should revolve around her otherwise I don't care and I usually end up leaving because I get annoyed/I just want my life, once we move in together THEN you are important enough for my life to revolve around you, and even then.

    I once dated a girl I was working with at my night job, which was her only job. I also had a day job, so I was working from 8am-10pm 5 days a week. She would get annoyed when I did not want her to come home with me or me to hers. Guess what? I am TIRED and want to rest, or maybe just play a game or be alone since I work with people all day lol

    I would not take it so personally, and def not assume he is cheating...

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    • I just read the ladies comments, interesting how the majority agree with you... and most guys just say he is busy lol

What Guys Said 20

  • What do you do when you get together? How open is your relationship: what do you talk about?

    It should be obvious to talk to him about it. Explain that you are worried about you two when you don't hear from him. If he's a man, he'll tell you what's going on and your curiosity would be sated.

    Asking us whether he is cheating? How would we know? Just because he doesn't text you? What if you didn't have a phone? Would you need an update every hour by fax? What the fuck is this?
    Maybe he just is busy with work. Does he work as a full-time cheater? I don't think so.

    Talk to your man, it should be simple enough once you get together.

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  • Eh. Guys can be just as mischievous as women. I wouldn't entirely believe what a guy says at its face.

    HOWEVER, I don't think you should jump to conclusions. You can inquire and pry about things he does on the days he doesn't hang out with you, but don't do it under the assumption that he is cheating on you.
    It will give you a better understanding of him, and why he is so busy. I mean what kind of job does he have? Does he hang out with friends? Does he have extra responsibilities? What sort of hobbies does he have?

    In my experience with women though is if they start not texting me or responding that day its an red flag they have lost interest in me. Women are shady as hell in their methods of breaking things off. :/
    Guys can do it too I suppose but don't jump to conclusions otherwise your relationship won't last.

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  • Guys are not chicks and most of us hate the constant texting thing UGH good way to make us feel soffocated, BLAH your together 3-4 days a week, find a hobby or something, buy a vibrator

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  • He is most likely busy with his life, obligations, work etc . Is there anything else that would make you think he is?

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    • i saw him deleted messages from his phone, but he said he just don't want me to know what he was talking to his uncle. When i get his phone he seen worry and he gets mad

    • Possible, but most guys do get upset when their gfs go through their phone, or even glance at it, because, then the inquisition begins. Babe, who's Kate? Someone on my team in my class. How come you never told me about her? Because I hate the class, my team is a bunch of idiots and I want it to be over. Babe, who's Gladys? The 59 year old head of HR at my job. And so on and so on. Not saying all women do that, but enough that we cringe whenever our gfs get a hold of our phones.

  • It's possible, one way of finding out is giving him a surprise visit, when you two haven't arranged a meet up.

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  • Don't jump to conclusions...

    He could be out with his friends. Seeing his parents, getting some work done around the house.

    Some people require some time alone just refocus each week from work, etc.,

    If you are that worried about it... ask him. Don't do it in a accusatory fashion though.

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  • 3 days a week is not bad at all. If he is getting the sex he wants I wouldn't be worried.

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  • Its very hard to tell. You see each other fairly often, it doesn't seem that suspicious. It woukd be easier to tell if you lived together or at least saw each other daily.

    He probably isn't, if he hasn't given you to not trust him then you shouldn't be skeptical.

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  • I live 7 hours away from my wife. Away for weeks at a time. I call her once a day because were both busy. If you can't get past your trust issues , don't blame it on him

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  • I mean, he might be but nothing you said is an indication that he is

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  • Probably, most people cheat wether they admit it or not. Humans are not monogymous. If you like him then don't worry about it.

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    • Most people cheat... that's usually what cheaters say... just sayin

    • Show All
    • "Most people cheat... that's usually what cheaters say... just sayin"

      Well said! @PhiOmega

    • Well it's not well said is it, because it's false lol.

  • If u can't trust him, it doesn't matter

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  • Have one of your friends he doesn't know flirt with him over social media, then you'll catch the bastard

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  • Nope.

    If he's busy that means he's busy. Guys aren't like girls, when guys say something, they mean it and they have no hidden meaning.

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  • As bcoz the boy is frustrated wid the girl or I thnk the guy would be cheatng or within this tym he is playing with the lyf of two girls simultaneously so he is dng a tym pass wid one and serious wid other one😉

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  • If he has a job, in my opinion he's busy.
    3X a week is a lot when you live that far away.

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  • Works a lot maybe? Do you try to have a conversation with him on days you don't see him?

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  • Yep he is definitely banging someone else.

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  • He may have a life and it takes up his time. Going to see you is a break from that life.

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  • I am cheating.

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What Girls Said 20

  • If he's not cheating, then he's definitely NOT interested in you long-term.

    Any time a guys sends mixed signals to you... or you can't tell if he really loves you, that's a HUGE (and really the only) red flag.

    A man that truly loves you is going to make that loud and clear... and constantly want to be with you/talk to you/make plans with you, because he isn't going to want to risk losing you to another male.

    A guy that is stringing you along but isn't treating you like a priority, is just keeping you around in case he can't find someone better.

    If he's not treating you like a priority, then you are his option.

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  • That's how me and my ex were. He was too busy on his Xbox.
    I highly doubt he's cheating!
    Does he work a lot? Maybe thats why and he's tired. Don't read too much into these things.

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  • I busted my man of 5yrs cheating. We live together. When questioned i asked would he told me if never caught. He said no. Moral is. DONT TRUST MEN! If he's busy and too busy to answer calls or return texts my guess is he's busy doing stuff he shouldn't

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  • If he has a job and has a busy life than no he is not cheating now if it was the opposite I would question as well but I wouldn't jump into conclusion though, my guy friend has a busy life and he works he sees me 2 times a week maybe 3 but on Saturdays he hangs out with his guy friends and I told him I am totally fine with that and he always apologize when he doesn't call or text but I don't mind because every guy needs his space and if we were dating I will still let him have his fun time with his guy friends

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  • This is women over analyzing their own situations. I know, I do it too.

    He has a life before you, he will continue it with you and it will be there after you. I know it's hard to understand and accept this, but his life is what has shaped him to the man you are dating.

    If it truly concerns you, share your thoughts in a way that doesn't feel accusatory. Good luck!

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  • In my opinion it could be either or. The fact that he doesn't text you or talk to you during the other 4 days makes me think there is a big possibility he is cheating. Even guys want to talk to the girl he cares about and I would think talk and make sure you are cheating. But at the same time if he has a job and a busy life then it would make since. Also if it is still early in the relationship he might be trying to not get too attached or constantly together until he knows he loves you or until he is ready for that kind of a relationship. But honestly if you have a gut feeling he is cheating go with it. Always trust your gut, trust me I've learned many lessons by not especially when it comes to cheating. I've never thought a guy was cheating on me when he wasn't. My guts always been right with that.

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  • more than likely he probably has another bitch, if not several.

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  • He might be busy, update us if you find anything more suspicious :) and 3 times a week is actually quite a lot, you may easily get tired of each other if you spend more time together. It is better to have some space.
    I would cut him some slack, let him have a drink or night out with his guy friends and your relationship would be better.
    So would yours be if you stop worrying about it and let yourself relax a little too :)

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  • Do you trust him?
    Obviously not if you are asking this question with no real proof of his infidelity.

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  • Noo seems like he's just busy.. women tend to forget our boyfriends have lives and if you see each other waaaay to much it just gets annoying, old and no excitement

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  • Hire someone to catch him red handed. It worked well for me.

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  • More than likely he is actually busy. If he makes time to go out with you, that means he is trying.

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  • he might look confident but then down there is very different story. he might just be sleeping with it.

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    • other "nice guys" might lying because of their down there. but he seems like showing it. so it's a good sign.

  • Noo.. I dont thing just busy

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  • Yes...69
    69
    69
    69

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  • Does he try to hide his phone from you or is very vague as to what he does on days he is MIA?

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    • He actually does try to take his phone everywhere he goes

    • Yeah but when he is with you is he guarding it like he is afraid you will look

  • I think so.

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  • Are the 3 days you spend together in the week after work or on his days of?

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  • some people dont need to see u as often as others... I am currently rammed with work and I have recently got with a new guy but I can barely fit him in... I love to see my guy all the time so its a massive thing that the 2 of us have to be apart, but my ex was the same as your bf... althugh I guess he was never THAT into me even though we lived together...

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  • He's busy.

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