Why does the texting have to end?

Me and this guy have been seeing each other for almost two months. At first, he would text me everyday, all day. Good morning, goodnight and everything in-between. It was nice. Lately, his texting has slowed way down and it is making me panic and overthink. He is still great when we get together, but I miss all the contact. It makes me feel like he would still be constantly texting if he was interested. Any advice?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • He hasn't lost interest in you. He has probably just lost interest in texting. It takes a lot of effort to keep a conversation going throughout the day for several months. Most people become bored of it because it slowly becomes more and more monotonous. I understand that it was nice for you, and I'm sure it was nice for him too. But going on like that forever sounds SO BORING. People need their space. They can't be attached to their phone 24/7. You could make it a habit to simply call him in the evening instead. That takes up less effort but you still get the kind of contact you probably need in order to feel satisfied.

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    • Thank you for being the voice of reason. I tend to overthink and overreact a lot and am trying to not do that so much. I try to hang back and not text him to see if he will text me first, but then when I don't hear from him for a while, I panic. I am such a mess!! Lol

      I read all kinds of things on the internet about how women should play hard to get and not text first, but if you want to talk, why is it so bad. He always responds when I text him. Texting and dating is so confusing! 😕

    • No worries lol. I'm an overthinker myself and I've been in your exact situation with a couple of guys I've been interested in. Truth be told, I don't see the point in playing hard to get. Like you said, if you want to talk, then you should. Of course it's good if the both of you sort of take turns to initiate, since it lets the other person know that you're still into them and that you're thinking about them. But I think that should come naturally. It feels kind of forced if you refuse to text him first just to see if he'll react, you know? Those silent moments, or pauses, should happen naturally and without either of you really thinking about it. Taking a couple of days off from texting/calling can be good, because then you get the chance to miss each other a little. And then when you get back into it, it'll be even more fun because you might have more things to talk about.
      Basically don't worry about it, and try to find a nice flow of subtle carelessness. :)

What Guys Said 4

  • If texting is so important to you, you could perhaps text him yourself. And make it known that you really like texting for whatever reason.

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  • Texts have no emotion in them. I can be joking around, and you could read it pissed off, and has 2 different meanings now. On the same text! But if you call, then it has more meaning.

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  • He has probably come to understand that excessive cell phone use can cause testicular cancer and has, thus, cut back on use.

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    • I don't think he's texting with those so he should be okay. ; )

  • Oh. My. God.

    Please... :S

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What Girls Said 3

  • Try talking to him about it and ask what's wrong so maybe you can comfort him and do the nice things over text to him, let him know you wanna talk to him and you miss talking as a much as the old days so he can get a view of what you mean (that seemed confusing to me but hopefully you get what I mean) I hope this helped!!

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  • Been with mine for a year. I hate how complacent things get. But it is what it is.

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  • same thing happened with me and my boyfriend, i dont think it means that he is no longer interested in you i think it means that he feels safe and comfortable with you. it can be exhausting texting someone everyday all day, it can take up so much time and energy and you can run out of things to say, i know its nice when they are being sweet and cute and thinking about you all day and im not going to say i dont miss it. but it desnt mean his feelings for you have gotten any less

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    • Good advice. Thank you. I want him to feel safe and comfortable with me. Just not SO comfortable that he stops trying and I do all the work! : )

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