Pretty but still a virgin at late 20's?

I have always received compliments by both men and women for being pretty and people always assumed that I definitely had a boyfriend or at least very experienced in sex already because outwards appearance wise, my looks is very deceiving.
However, in reality I am actually a virgin and non of my friends believe me when I told them although it's the truth.
I have went out on dates a few times before but I have never met a guy who made me feel emotionally attached enough to want to go further into the relationship at all.
I always chicken out when sex is near because I just couldn't bear to go through with it because I cannot have sex with someone I am not entirely in love with.
Although I am pretty and act confident on the outside, inside I am actually kind of shy and awkward and totally inexperience in sex (actually, sex experience = 0).
I am worried that if a guy finds out the real me, he is going to think that there is something wrong with me and because of that I sort of gave up on meeting men and going on dates nowadays. I am blessed with good looks but it is useless when the personality doesn't match at all...
Some women can be so comfortable around men so why can't I be the same?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • For me, the lack of experience wouldn't turn me off of you. The lack of trying or willing to learn new things would. I totally understand about being with the right person and having that emotional connection with them before wanting sex. This is your own preference, but I would say for many successful couples they had sex or were physically active well before they fully fell in love with each other. If I was starting to date I would certainly want some kind of connection to develop and there would have to minimum amount of trust and comfort built up before any sex started. But for me true love and that deep passionate and emotional connection probably would not develop until months later. The thing is, I would be ready for sex after about a few weeks or a month. Basically start dating, find you really like this person and get comfortable with them and trust them, start having sex and then later you fall totally in love with them. You want to totally fall in love before having sex. Nothing wrong with that, but that may one of the things holding up the show here. If it takes months to fall in love, but no sex, I can see how a lot of guys aren't interested in that and therefore hard to find a bf. The other problem I think you have is that you are dwelling too much on your lack of sexual experiences and this is making you more self-conscience about it which is putting more pressure and undue stress on yourself. Just be yourself. Guys love to find unique women.

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What Guys Said 5

  • It doesn't matter at all.

    Out of interest, when you talk about not having sex do you just mean you haven't had full sex? For me, once someone gets naked, I pretty much consider it sex.

    I guess I'm thinking if you have done other stuff but not full sex then you might have experienced quite a bit anyway.

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  • It's just how you are. There are also men who have no success with women and believe me it is much harder when you're a man. If I was like you, I would be worries to that a girl would think there is something wrong with me. I am also good looking (yes I am confident about myself) and I had many girls hitting on me but Im too sensitive. I need to emotionally bond with my partner.

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  • I used to feel the same at some point. I never had any gf or anything sexual except a kiddish play with my cousin in our childhood. I tried sexting online with some random girls. Though it improved my sexual knowledge a bit but i feel a little disheartened when i think about it. I feel like i should have sticked to my original plan of doing anything with "the one". I am still a virgin and i am back on my original plan and would recommend you to stick to it but don't be too shy And discover the reason why you stop feeling emotionally attached to the guys you meet. Maybe its something from the past or anything i dont know just figure it out. You will never regret sex ever in your life.

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  • I don't know at all

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  • what is your age? because i'm also a virgin

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What Girls Said 1

  • Maybe you just haven't met the correct kind of guys yet

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