Is it needy to tell a guy that you need more communication than one phone call a week and that it frustrates you when he doesn't answer your text?

I was dating a guy for 3 months I never complained about his bad communication habits, but he would only phone me once a week and when I'd text sometimes he did not answer. I only get to see him once a week because he works 3 jobs. I finally told him I needed more communication like more phone calls or more texting like more closeness because I feel so disconnected from him. He told me I was being needy.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't believe its needy, no. I would just advise you to put yourself in his shoes, if he is working THREE jobs, I guarantee you he is exhausted! That is not an excuse for poor communication, but a reason. Tell him you know he must be exhausted working 3 jobs, and you admire him for it, but you really want to talk more and spend more time together. GIve him a little bit, if he still can't even manage a few texts a week, you should consider moving on.

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    • Working 3 jobs is not that uncommon in this current economic climate, despite what "other" diluted people will tell you. I myself had to work 3 jobs just to manage getting through college (that was brutal!). For many people the only work they can get is low paying part time work, so they need to have 2 or 3 of them just to get the same pay as 1 full time job. Anyone who says that doesn't happen is clearly a spoiled, rich, diluted, elitist, with literally NO grasp on either the current economic conditions or REALITY.

What Guys Said 4

  • How often were you texting?

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    • Maybe once or twice a week.

    • "needy" is often something people say meaning 'this person has needs I don't want to fulfill, and i'm going to blame them and tell them to deal with it'.

      It's probably used appropriately when someone has a big hole in their self esteem they are trying to fill with external stuff, and can never fill it.

      This just sounds like you want more of a relationship then he's able to or interested in giving.

      It doesn't matter if you're 'needy' or he's 'cold'. Its just a compatibility issue.

  • That's not needy in the slightest.
    You're dating him. He should make the effort

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  • Yes, give him a break. He works 3 jobs!

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  • That's needy given context.

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What Girls Said 2

  • It sounds more like you're the side girl. I'm buying the three jobs ploy. My mom had two cheating husbands and I know the lines of bull all too well. That's not needy, he's just a jerk, dump him. If a person truly cares for someone they make time for them no matter how busy they are. It's all about priorities.

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    • Lol so a guy who says he works 3 jobs is cheating? What are guys who actually work 3 jobs supposed to say, that they are unemployed? Then what are unemployed guys supposed to say ect?

    • @genuinlySensitive You're an idiot and as I recall I wasn't leaving this so you could make a snide comment. In fact you taking up for him tells me you're doing it because i'm right. Besides if he really is working three jobs where did he find the time to date her to begin with?

  • No. you're not being needy. Just explain to him you that you feel lije there needs to be more communication between you two.

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