Is my boyfriend just not emotional or just not interested in me?

I've been seeing this guy for 5 months and its been a roller coaster. Things were great at first and I was really falling for him and he showed me similar signs. After three months or so, he told me one day that he was worried I saw this as something serious, as in potential marriage. We are both in our mid-20s and I can honestly say I've not shown any signs of wanting marriage or anything that serious. At that point he said that although he really likes me and wants to continue seeing me, he isn't enamored with me. Let me unpack this a little. He has never been in a relationship this long or serious before and he has never been in love. He also said that while he isn't enamored with me, he has been enamored with other girls in the past but never had the chance to date them. So basically I'm more into him than he is into me and he said that he doesn't feel like it is a relationship that is going anywhere, but he doesn't want it to end.

I've been in one long-term really healthy relationship before so I know what that feels like. I know this isn't necessarily healthy because I do feel insecure from time to time and don't even know where we really stand, but I generally enjoy his company and dating him for some odd reason. Sometimes it really feels like he is opening up to more intimacy and a deeper connection, but other days I feel like he is just more distant and treats me like a guy friend. He will pin me down and just lie on top of me and just tease me. Is he just not into me or is he inexperienced in love and scared of/unsure of his feelings?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like he is confused to me. I've heard it said you don't know what you have until it's gone then it leaves a hole you can't fill. This may be one of those.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Runnnnnnnn before you really get your feelings involved and get really hurt. He is letting you know he doesn't want a future with u , u can do better

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