I have very low self esteem due to my looks(regardless on how you think I look) I find myself really ugly everytime I tell this to my friend/family they always answer with "but you're a guy..." like it's not a big deal. We all no that women can go on an on about how "looks don't matter" but we all know that's not true, granted I know they don't seek perfection or rich guys like a lot of guys think. I know that a girl wants her guy to at least look decent.
We need to stop trying to convince other that there are no ugly people out there, sad truth is that there are some people are ugly. Problem is that even my psycologist thinks it's not a problem and kinda brushes it aside whenever I talk about it. yeah new haircut, workout, better clothes blah blah I'm doing most of those but the point is why is it okay for a girl to feel bad about being ugly when a guy is just ignored?
Most Helpful Guy
Men are trapped in the gender role of being strong and logical, whereas women are seen as weak and emotional. Meaning that to be a man means that you don't need any emotional comfort, but women need all of the comfort they can get. If you hate the way you look, then you have emotional insecurities and therefore are failing to fulfill your gender role of emotionless robot. This is why men are not allowed to hate the way we look.
There has been no movement to break men out of our gender role, because society told everyone that our gender role makes it impossible for us to need to be freed from our gender role. We are after all suppose to be the ones that have all the power, and set everything up in our favor already. So it is assumed that we don't have any real issues that need to be dealt with.
Even most feminists that claim they don't support keeping men in gender roles, don't dare admit that men have emotions and need more support than we are currently getting. That would take focus away from women's issues. So now women are allowed to be strong when she wants to be, and weak when she needs to be.
Men are still always forced to act like "real men" and not let anything get to us. Society needs to change, and I think the first thing is to stop shaming men for being insecure. Being insecure is a part of being human, yet anytime a guy shows an insecure side, everyone makes fun of him and tells his woman that she needs to dump him and find herself a real man.
Anytime a guy tries to bring up this issue feminists try to destroy his argument by claiming women have it worse and we should ignore male problems until all female problems are dealt with. Even if it was worse for women, it still wouldn't mean that a man shouldn't have a right to feel insecure, or seek help for it without being treated like he failed as a man. We still have boys being slapped if their parents catches them crying, because they think boys aren't suppose to cry.2