Girls, being a gentleman leads me to failure with girls?

I'm a 20 year old with a well paying job. I have my own house. How come I'm the least liked of the male species?

Updates:
This question was not to blame females but only to get the opinion of what I am doing wrong to attract one.
Personality I like movies that involve morals. I bike occasionally. I used to play sports football and track. I like outdoor activities. I love hard when it occurs. I love music of many genre's. I'm outgoing. I'm a good listener I enjoy helping others and putting a smile on their faces. Materials doesn't simply make me or give me a boost towards the belief that I'm perfect cause I'm not no one is. My dream is to travel the world and look for away to create a better place. I need a teammate

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Most Helpful Girl

  • As women we tend to gravitate toward strong men, a little attitude goes a long way, we don't want them to be jerks but we do need someone who is willing to challenge us a little and stand up to us. The nice guys rarely do this, a little to passive, a little to accommodating a way to agreeable. All women say they want that but the truth is we don't, we find it weak and evolution says a queen will seek out a strong male as a mate.

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What Girls Said 51

  • It could be because of your age.
    At 20 years old, most females have not come to respect or appreciate those qualities yet.
    As at that stage in life, most are figuring themselves out still, having fun, studying, partying etc, and the idea of finding a good educated and sensible provider has not yet entered their minds, as these are not yet pressing issues to them. But I'm referring to MOST females at that age, not ALL.
    But I can assure you that as a few years pass, females will more than likely start to notice these qualities, and respect you for your life choices. I know I certainly would.
    And I can actually relate to you... I have a respectful job, work very hard, am responsible, and also own a house, yet am struggling to find mr right, I feel a little invisible to be honest.
    Another thing to consider though... are you also showing other qualities aswell, such as kindness, a sense of humour, and interest in these females? Women don't just go after men with jobs and houses, they also want someone they can fall in love with too, someone who makes them laugh, and appreciates them.
    But otherwise, good on you for taking yourself seriously! It is very rare these days!
    Would you mind answering my most recent question too? :)

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  • Because women don't just base a good paying job and a house to be the only things important when choosing a guy. We consider what is attractive to us in looks, appeal, defining characteristics, personality, humour, and we weigh in the man's flaws (i. e. does he gamble too much, is a womanizer, is he messy) to know if he's compatible with us.

    Just because you seemingly have it all figured out security-wise doesn't mean that you've got it all. You have to have other things to offer, and a lot of that would be the rest of the package: intelligence, communication, sensitivity, appeal, etc.

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  • I guess you are not going for the right girls. I would go for a guy like you, if I liked your personality that is.

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  • I would say a lot of girls look for at least some confidence in a guy. Sometimes nicer guys are more shy and don't have that. However, from my experience I have gravitated towards being interested in guys with different levels of confidence.
    Also, I know it is said that guys like a challenge, but I can also say that when a guy does not present some sort of challenge to date/be with him, something is lost. You don't have to be an asshole but maybe you are too nice that people think you are always available and take you for granted.

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  • Without knowing things apart from your money I can't tell you why you are least like. Or why you beleive you are least like.

    They could be intimidated or if all you talk about is your money and house they might think you are full of yourself? Not saying you do any of the above. I'm just guessing grlmy experience with some high achievement guys. All they talk about is their achievements and it's really a turn off.

    Just relax and be youself. Show a girl you have a playful and caring side apart from your work. The right girl will appreciate you for who you are

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  • Those are good things for you to have, but do you have difficulty meeting women or keeping them? Meeting women is indeed difficult, but if it's the latter it depends on how you treat them, I'd say. It can also be bad luck, maybe they realised you weren't a good fit for them for whatever reason. Sometimes that happens. Don't give up! :)

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  • Just because you have a job and a house and whatever, doesn't mean you'll immediately get a girlfriend. It might be because you're chasing after girls who are not interested or that they're not attracted to your personality. Please don't ever believe you might be "too nice" or "too perfect" for someone to like you, there's no such thing, trust me. But mostly, I think you should stop thinking that material possessions will get you a girlfriend. Is this really what you want in a relationship - someone who'll love you for what you HAVE and not for what you ARE?
    maybe try focusing more on your personality - be respectful, interesting, funny, original... not to get a girlfriend, but for yourself. Live the life you want to live, be the person you want to be - and you might get much better results in your relationships : )

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  • Being well established and having a house and a well paying job isn't the key to finding a girl, just characteristics that are helpful with developing your life. Focus on yourself and what you want to improve or go out and do things that make you happy or that you enjoy. Be approachable and friendly with girls and I am sure that you will be able to meet a girl who will like you. Don't lead with what you own or how much money you have. Develop a connection based on the same interests and morals that you may share so that it is more than a shallow interest.

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  • maybe you're trying to hard?

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    • I don't want to become a dooshbag its hard to be romeo and Casanova. Its like you have to choose your destiny. Be kind try to fight the sudden emotions or just be like I'm smashing and dashing

    • Too true, but u have to find common ground. Girls like a little attitude and confidence but we also like kind and considerate.

  • women your age don't want to settle. It's great you have your life put together so early. Be patient. Or date older women.

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  • It leads you to failure with the wrong girls. There are girls who live your type, you just have to be patient and lucky and you'll find those girls.

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  • If you are who you say you are, then you have nothing to worry about. You're still young, who you're looking at are girls Who only likes the bad boy image. give yourself time, Be better than who you are now, and you'll attract more women in the near future.

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  • If you're a gentleman, stick with it because one day a girl will come around and appreciate it for once.

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  • Girls love independent and rich guys. The only exception is if you are a poor communicator.

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  • I don't understand how exactly you are a gentleman? The only 'qualities' you mentioned about yourself are that you have your own place, and have a well paying job. That has nothing to do with a person personality wise, or qualify you to be a gentleman. I'm curious, because the way this was phrased almost sounded like a friend zone or 'nice guys finish last' kind of thing, (which is a myth)
    I feel like your question needed a little more information.

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  • you didn't say anything about your personality. you said you have a well paying job and you're a homeowner. that's great but how do you make a woman FEEL? does the woman you like get excited about you? is she attracted to you?

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  • I prefer gentleman. You just have to wait for the right one.

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  • Dont force it the right lady will come

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  • maybe you should improve your communication skill with girls. I bet, you'll be fine. good luck!

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  • I used to feel this way when I was younger. All the guys my age seemed to be going after the slutty girls. I just waited, and dated guys a few years older. Problem solved.

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  • Date older women.:)

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  • yes sir be nice, but not a push over.. try and have a balance :)) many blessings

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  • You're just saying basic stuff that even the average man can do but nothing about your personality, life goals, if you're a funny person, etc.

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  • You're probably not doing anything wrong, although most girls do not like to win easily, we want you to challenge us and if you give in too easily a lot of girls will not respect you. That being said, there's a difference between challenging us and having a discussion and fighting constantly.

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  • Dont do what comes to your head, do the opposite

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  • Being a gentleman how?

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  • I would love to be with a guy that has a good job and a nice house. It probably has to do with the way you put yourself out there.

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  • I dated a guy who was attractive, Italian, with great confidence and came from money. He was also controlling and didn't like the idea of me tattooing. I dumped him right away. I'm now involved with a great guy, supportive, and works a simple job, but shows he's moving up slowly. Sometimes women don't see finances, but personality. You just haven't found the girl you click with. You're young, you have time.

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  • Nope definitely not, If you are a gentleman. I would prefer it over any other "Male species" lol. But all girls are looking for a man to "treat them right" and I believe a gentleman would be it. you might just be overthinking it, being a gentleman is The way that will make girls swoon. We love cheesy moments but we won't actually admit it :}

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  • Your 20 and have your own House? Well now I feel uber unaccomplished )-:

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