Ok so usually ill just ask a straight forward question but I'm in need of some real advice ! I am a young lady and I have a lover who I have been on off with for years I'm talking maybe 10 years now with year gaps and all sorts and I'm struggling a bit in life with money and health and nine times put of ten he will make me feel worse before he makes me feel better I've looked at it, this situation and I feel like his presence in my life is causing me more harm than good he puts me down when I really don't need it and makes me feel like I'm replaceable and I don't feel like things will change anytime soon and when I remove him some people say I'm not very nice for doing that but I'm so confused and I love him a lot but I have to love myself more or I can't see this ending well! For me especially he's very controlling and I feel like I've put myself on hold to cater for him? Any advice men or women please ask any questions if I haven't made things clear ! Dicussing this will help thanks
Is it selfish to remove someone from your life who doesn't respect or help you?
What Guys Said 5
What is wrong with being selfish sometimes? Like most things in life whether or not being selfish is good or bad is a matter of balance. If you aren't going to look out for yourself no one will. We all need to put ourselves first from time to time. It doesn't matter if that is selfish or not, its just something that has to be done. This is YOUR life, and you are the only one that has a right to decide how you live it.0
hell no it isn't selfish, its better for your life. I've already burned a few bridges with people I used to consider really close friends, they just turned out to be piece of shit human beings, I'm off for the better.0
if that doesbt' respect u... it's only fair isn;t it?1
What Girls Said 5
Doesn't respect me / is controlling. If I am certain of either is leave immediately. The only question is whether I'm sure not what to do if I am sure. Like honestly think it is impossible to be around someone who does not even treat you as well as you treat yourself and remain sane... You're living a double consciousness.
What is it that make you think he doesn't respect you and how did you put your life on hold and how is he controlling?
It will help you falsify what to so if you specify exactly what it is you think is going on -- not just what you feel though of course that is important.:)0
Sometimes decision you make can be selfish for other people. But it can be the best for you. So which side you will prefer? Of course your side.
You deserve happiness and peace like everyone else. And he doesn't bring any peace to your life. So what do you wait for? Decision has to be made. Even it is the harshest.0
he doesn't make you feel good and isn't treating you right so cut his ass off. why do you need to keep someone in your life who is negative? you deserve to be happy. fuck him, you come first. if he can't act right then he needs to get gone0
It's not selfish. This is YOUR life. You are allowed to decide who will be part of it. You can pretty much cut off anyone for any reason.0
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