Girls always say how much of a great guy I am but never want to date me?

Girls are always saying how nice I am and that I'm the kind they all want. I'm fairly confident, 6ft 3, well spoken, dress nicely, polite, friendly. I'd never cheat on a girl, I know what the feeling is like to be cheated on so thats why I can never do this. Girls always show interest then when I ask them to hang out and tell them what we're doing they always reject my in a "nice" way (we're just friends/we will see/maybe....) I'm not a push over like most people think, I can be a nasty little bastard if I wanted to be but I'm not changing for anyone. The girls I ask always end up dating someone else then talking to me like I could be a potential, maybe in the future or something like that. Basically a plan B, then 2 years later down the line tell me that they really liked me. If that was the case why didn't they date me back then? It's too late for them to come back the boat has departed. When ever I go out with my friends one is gay and he has so many girls trying to get with him and he rejects them all (why they try him I don't know) and my other friend is similar to me but more confident than I am, shorter and fatter than me and can't seem to get a girl either. I've had 2 female friends try to set me up and everytime has failed. I go for girls around 2 years younger than me. I tried clubs, pubs, malls,online dating, pool halls, no results. I try many different approaches, player approach, friendly approach, friendly but making my intentions clear, I have tried many types of girls, shy, goth, hipster, even the slutty gurls and still they're not interested. The guys at my work can't seem to work out why no girls want to date me. I don't know what else I can do any tips?

Updates:
My girls have told me that playing an instrument helps, I play bass and guitar and still that can't seem to attract them. I had 1 8 month relationship 5 years ago and she still likes me but I can't date her ever again, not after what happened and getting back with an ex is always a recipe for disaster. I am so inexperienced in relationships I feel now it's just getting more difficult as I am getting older

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It seems to me that you are either boring, awkward or 'not hot'. Basically, you're a decent guy but you completely lack sex appeal. Maybe girls hit on you and it goes over your head. Maybe the conversations aren't as interesting as you think they are. Maybe you never let on that you're interested until you ask them out so it throws them off. Maybe you have unrealistic standards for the women you ask them out so you're asking 'above your league'. Or maybe those girls are being nice and you just aren't that good looking. I'd guess it's probably not that one because ugly guys can usually get women if they're very socially competent.

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    • I mainly focus my conversation towards their likes and interests, if we have something in common I mention that I like it too

What Girls Said 3

  • How attractive are you? Throughout all of this I haven't seen a single thing talking about how attractive you are.

    If a girl says that, she means that you're a good guy, but not attractive enough/her type or vice versa.

    Sure, they want a guy with your personality. Who wouldn't? But the looks is probably the clincher.

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    • How am I supposed to tell if I am "attractive"? That's up to the person I am talking to right? Also many girls tell me I am good looking, but still no luck

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    • @RationalLioness I wasn't trying to be sexy, and my comment was meant to be hypothetical. I honestly don't know if I'm attractive or not. I see some parts of myself that I like and other parts that I don't like. I like my shoulders, my chest, my arms, my calves and feet. I don't like my face, my premature balding, the unexplainable rashes on my thighs and butt, my veiny hands, my thin forearms and my voice.

      Nobody my age tells me whether or not I'm attractive or not. I do need the validation because sometimes I feel like people are going by the 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it' phrase. I feel like nobody wants to rate my looks because they are afraid of hurting my feelings, but I want honest criticism more than anything... without coming off as a clingy, nerdy mooch.

      Do I have confidence? It's a very broad term. I am content with some parts of myself, like my personality, my intelligence, my creativity, my humor, my understanding of music, and more. [Char. Limit]

    • @coverguy I'm exactly like you some parts I hate others I don't, same with the confidence bit

  • Maybe you appear intimidating?

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    • It's 60% of the time they approach me, which surely would be a good thing right?

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    • I wouldn't even be able to tell if a girl liked me by their body language, all girls I have approached have the same body language

  • Are you physically ugly? You sound like a great guy, but some girls just won't date a guy unless he is physically attractive. A girl can like you, but if she's not physically attracted to you, she can't force herself. When the girls act interested and then later on say that they "really liked you", they honestly really just liked the attention. They said stuff like "maybe in the future " because they didn't want you to move on, and they liked the attention you gave them. An ego boost, so to speak. My advice is, just keeping doing you. You sound great and a girl is bound to like you eventually.

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What Guys Said 1

  • they might be seeing you as boring

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    • Everyone that I hang out with seems to think I'm awesome :S

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    • " cocky twat " thats wht they want

    • Tried that approach and got told to fuck off and leave her alone

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