I don't trust my new girlfriend, what should I do?

I recently started dating my best friend of two years. It's been two weeks. I'm very happy about it, but I don't think I can trust her for many reasons. I really want to, but it's hard to ignore everything.

1. She has many guy friends and talks to a lot of guys
2. She still keeps in contact with 3 of her exes
3. She takes her phone out a few times while we're on dates (more than an average person)
4. Sometimes she posts on the Snapchat story, and then replies back way later, claiming she was "busy"
5. She keeps making up excuses as to why she hasn't wanted to make it "Facebook" official

Am I being too paranoiod or should I talk to her? Thank you guys and gals from GAG for your advice.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's time for the Big Talk now, bluepeter, for You--------Don't think I can trust her for many reasons,
    You both have been besties 'Of two years' here, dear, and with Now this newbie relationship suddenly have had a change of heart, a change in the wind, there is Part of her that will not let go of her old ways and the Past that was once a Blast, and this is why she is pulling these little '1-5' stunts that stink.
    I also believe, with the writing on the wall and all, she isn't Into a Real Relationship with You or anyone right now, and that she still thinks of you as her... bestie from the restie.
    Talk to her, get on the same page. She is making you look like a coy cock rooster with egg all over your face, this little Chickadee Cheater.
    If anything you could go back to jut being 'Best friends,' but things may never be the same in the barn yard again, my friend, and could be you will end up with not a fine feathered friend in the end but a Fair weather one.
    Good luck. xx

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    • I've thought about it over and over, and what you just said has't crossed my mind. You made a valid point about how she still wants to be in her old ways and wants to be just best friends. Even though I know it can never be the same, but I was willing to take that risk. I'm beginning to think this was a huge mistake... But nevertheless, I will talk to her about it. Thank you so much for your advice, it truly opened my eyes more. Have a good day Paris13! :)

    • Oh, so welcome, bluepeter... yes, talk to her. Glad to have obliged, it does make sense.:)) xxoo

    • Thank you, bluepeter, for allowing me to lend a helping hand, it was my pleasure. xxoo

What Girls Said 5

  • Okay, my first advice for you would be to talk to her about it. If she isn't willing to make an effort to change or understand where you're coming from, I would end the relationship. I say this because I'm a very social girl and I talk and flirt with everyone, it's just my personality. Although that being said, I dated a guy who I did this to and I was cheating on him with my ex and whenever he tried to talk to me about it, I'd get defensive. I'd keep a look out for that. If she isn't willing to make sacrifices, she's not the one! Good luck and I hope for the best!

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    • I thank you for being honest about what you've done, and that opened my eyes more to the situation. I will most definitely talk to her about it before I fall for her more. Thank you so much for the advice!

    • How's everything? Did you try and talk to her?

    • Thank you for coming back to see how things were. I haven't talked to her yet unfortunately. I will wait it out to see if I see strong clues before I jump the gun and/or before I'm tired of it. Max 1 month. I will see her this weekend and next, I will try and look for clues myself.

  • I agree with edeseps. You listed 5 signs, 4 of them are red flags. Listen to your gut, if it feels wrong than it usually is.

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  • talk to her, let her know you want to be official and if she makes up any excuses just walk away. doesn't matter who it is if they dont make you feel appreciated and you are suspicious of her actions and intentions then walk away

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  • Learn how to trust her

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  • You shouldn't be dating her. Seems like she is only dating you for the thrill.

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What Guys Said 5

  • Wait, your best friend of two years? All your points make no sense then, you should already know that she likes hanging out with guys, isn't replying regularly, etc. by the way, making it Facebook official after two weeks is too soon indeed.

    In my opinion these "signs" shouldn't worry you so much, all it matters is the general feeling overall and you said you are very happy about it. So?

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    • I knew what I was getting myself into, believe me. But I didn't know reasons 2-5 will still happen.. Many people are saying to talk to her about it, but I'm scared that I'm being over paranoid. Mainly because if I talk to her about it, it'll show that I don't trust her and might damage or even end our relationship. But I will most definitely talk to her about it if it continues, I'll give it more time. Thank you so much for your advice!

  • Yes some of these (2) would give me hesitation about wanting this relationship to go any farther , but so far I see nothing that for sure says you can't trust her

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  • Well, just leave her.

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  • Break up man. She's not worth it if she does those things. You deserve more. Respect yourself dude. :)

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  • How close were you with her before you started dating?

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