When was the first time you know you were truly in love? and I don't mean thought you were or anything like that. how old were you?

I *thought* I was 21 (I know, late, right?) when I met my ex wife. come to find out, I was only fooling myself when I didn't actually fall into what I could feel was something deeper 10 years later (is it bad that I was 31?) I've only loved two women in my life and I'm hurting without it.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I knew I was in love with my ex-boyfriend. He told me that I was the first ever girl whom actually loved him and was loyal to him. Found out Monday night that he did not have the same feelings for me, so we mutually broke up.
    He's doing good and is happy, but that's what I've picked up, has no remorse that we broke up. Meanwhile, I'm left heartbroken.
    Everyone tells me that it's due to him being off his ADHD medicine for three weeks with his attitude, I do care, but at the same time I do not.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I feel like I'm falling in love with my boyfriend now, and he's the only one I've felt that way for...
    Looking back, are there any signs you might take as warning signs now that you didn't when you were first with your ex-wife? Or did your disliking for each other grow as you two transitioned deeper into adulthood? You don't have to answer this if it's too personal of a question.

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    • I'll do my best to answer this and get you what you need to know. just let me know if you have more questions or if I left something out.

      I have to admit that I'm confused about your first question, but I think it means that you want to know if there were signs that I wasn't happy or not in love with me ex-wife. The answer wasn't clear then but it is it now as it is with love. You can be mystified, bejeweled and overwhelmed with feelings. Looking back and after having what I truly believe is love, there are. But at that point I was 20, had never had a serious relationship and I followed all of the motions to do what I thought I was and that was to make her happy. I sacrificed a lot (although I was not a saint by any means) and suffered 7 years worth of physical abuse. That and her change in behavior every day led me to realize I wasn't happy and I had to get away, despite meaning to leave my children behind. Is that what you wanted to know? If not, ask again and I'll do my best :)

    • That's perfect actually. Thank you. I was just wondering if, in retrospect, you could identify any points in your relationship that may have warned you that it wouldn't work out but you ignored them. I have a fear of letting myself be beguiled by the idea of happiness with one person that I end up unhappily married and/or divorced, so that's why I asked.

    • I thnk the point where she first laid a hand on me... that was a big thought but I was too worried about being alone so I stayed with it. and then I was 2.5 hours away at college and had many interests. I wanted to leave her but felt it was wrong. I just wish I had made that move. I have people tell me that I wouldn't have my 3 beautiful daughters without her. I tell them I sure as hell might, just with someone that wasn't her.

  • I was In love once my exhusband for 3 years is still the love of my life even tho he messed up

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    • still being in love with an ex is a hard and miserable thing to do. over the course of the last two months of my most recent relationship, I mourned heavily for about 4 weeks. And then she totally opened my eyes with all of the deceipt and excuses sicne she chose to leave, using me for anything she wanted and needed and I gave in. I am much healthier this time and while I do feel love for her still, I am much more neutral with the last 3 weeks and am starting to grow away from her. I want a connection, yes. Do I want her back? Not so much now. but I'm not shutting off my feelings and wants to have her in my life. I just have to refuse to be used, no matter how nice or trite her statements appear to be.

  • I'm too young to truly fall in love or find a true love, so far's just been stupid crush

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  • First time was when I was 18, with my current boyfriend. We've been dating for 2 years and I hope everything stays this way. Ours is currently a long distance relationship though... so, it's hard, but we're strong.

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    • I wish you the best with the LD thing. that's a very difficult thing to overcome.

    • Thank you, let's hope. And I'm sorry to hear it didn't work out with your two loves.

What Guys Said 1

  • It was when I was 23, and she was my first girlfriend. Too bad it didn't last more than 6 months, though. She used to talk to me about marriage and kids, but ended up cheating on me with a 60 year old asshole.

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