I'm seriously considering wanting to date a girl with two kids, what advice do you have for me?

So i really like this girl a lot, she has kids and before i met her i would have said no way, but over the months since i got to know her im seriosuly considering dating her.

Give me some pro's and cons. Or at least your general advice about dating someone with kids.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Do you like children? Do you want to have children (or at least be a stepfather) someday? If not, don't date a single mother. For years, I tried to convince myself that I could date a single mother even though I can't stand children. I was wrong.

    That being said, if you want to date her, you must understand that her children will be first in her life; you'll be second. That's normal and expected. But don't let her use her children as an excuse for being late, canceling dates, etc. If she can't manage her time and give you her full attention when you're on a date, she's not good relationship material.

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    • i do like children, being a father is still something im debating, but this girl is seriously making me think 'yes i do'

    • That's good. I'm sure you know this already, but she and the children are a package deal. If you and the children don't get along, it will be a deal-breaker. Single mothers tend to have a harder time in the dating world because there are a lot of guys (such as myself) who can't or won't accept the fact that they have children. They're looking for a guy who will genuinely accept that aspect of their lives, and the pros/cons that come with it, so you'll be a hot commodity. :-)

What Girls Said 5

  • Well if you like kids and you see a future with this woman then I say go for it but I wouldn't meet them just yet. Deciding to date someone with kids means accepting the package deal. I'm not saying that you now have the role of a step dad but if want to date this woman to see if one day you can be together in a serious committed relationship then date her if not then don't waste each others time. I dealt with a man for 2 years that had kids I met one of his kids once. I loved him very much and if it ever got to a point where he was actually serious I was prepared to love and accept his children and be a part of their lives but unfortunately he wasn't ready and I walked away happy that he did not involve me in their lives because the break up would have been hard.

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  • I think at your age you're going to have a harder time finding people who don't have kids. My advice is, never expect to be her first priority... and make her kids your first priority over her, too.

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  • You will have to accept the fact that you will never be her number one priority but also be willing to make her yours in due time. I once dated a full time single dad and it was hard for me to come to terms with that, i ended things.

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    • yes this is definitely something im thinking about often, that the kids will always come first.

    • Its hard to accept when you dont have that kind of responsibility or mindset yourself. At first it will be cute because you are really into the girl, but when all that initial relationship jazz wears off it becomes MUCH harder to deal with and you may start to feel less eager to play house.

    • At least i can tell you thats what happened to me.

  • Don't date her.

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    • And what are your reasons i should not do so?

    • Show All
    • The end

    • You fucker! Oh wait... You're not. My bad.

  • You will have to accept the fact that you may be getting attached to children you have no legal rights to.
    Here's a bit of truth about single mothers: They want amazing, respectful, honorable fathers for their children. They'll go hunting for that subconsciously especially if the children's father is a piece of sh*t whom deep down they are humiliated for letting lust and/or love make them fools and conceive with him. However, the reality is that sometimes relationships simply don't work out. Yet if you've put in 100% by accepting her children, getting to know them, and bonding with them then you now have to say goodbye to that so she can find the next family unit replacement.

    Honestly though, at your age, most men and women are single parents. If you were younger, I would say "F*ck no."

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What Guys Said 5

  • I've never dated anyone with kids. But if you have games or can relate to those kids somehow I say go for it Because happy kids = happy mom which would = you I'm guessing LOL i1127.photobucket.com/.../ezgif.com-add-text_2.gif

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    • Well im pretty good with the nieces and nephews i have so i think im good with kids. lol

    • LOL I just noticed that this question already had a MHO dang you answer lol

      Yup you should bne good then

  • Umm... seriously?

    Why would you do that? Not only will you be dating a woman who will never, ever put you first--she can't, she has kids--you're going to be putting your life to raising another man's children. She can even sue you for child support if you develop a relationship with the kids.

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    • i understand about not putting me first. fortunately i have incredible patience. other man's children doesn't bother me, the man doesn't sound like he's part of the picture very much. As far as the suing thing goes. she's just not that type of person.

    • Asker, you need to go talk to a divorce attorney. EVERY man and woman thinks "he/she is just not that type of person" and then the police are giving out restraining orders.

      If you want to basically be a cuckold tho, go ahead and raise another man's children, lol.

    • taking my age into consideration, im not finding a whole lot of single women around my age who are not mothers.

  • I don't know because I've never been there yet, I think if u seriously in that type relationship, you are ready, because u know the responsibilities.. good luck, all the best for you

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  • Massive reponsibility!!!

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  • You are in the age range where that may not be an issue

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    • where what may not be an issue?

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