Guys, will he try to win me back?

We had been dating for about 2 months and things were going great! We weren't seeing anyone else and we had a great time together, and the sex was the best I've ever had. Then last week he told me that it was too much like a relationship and he wanted to just be friends with benefits, that he wouldn't see anyone else but he wanted to have the option to pursue other girls if they came along and not feel guilty about it.

I told him that I'm not a girl that he can use to pass the time with until someone better comes along, and that for me dating means getting to know someone with the possibility of it turning into a relationship down the road, so I broke it off with him. I know I deserve more than being just a friend with benefits.

Problem is, we really liked each other, had a great time together, and I could see being with him if we wanted the same thing. I know you can't force someone into something they don't want, but is it stupid to hope that he comes back saying that he'd be willing to give it a shot?

I haven't contacted him since we broke things off, is there any way for me to know if he's going to try to get me back, or if I should just go with my instincts and continue on with my life and not look back?


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6

Most Helpful Guy

  • Honestly I wouldn't, you are right that you are forcing a full on relationship on someone who doesn't feel comfortable with it. But if you actually read over what you have just written I can see something even more troubling.

    You say "will he try to win me back?"

    #1-Try. I'm sorry are you saying that there's a possibility you won't have him back, because it sounds like you are the one who has been left and is distraught over it.
    #2- Win. I'm sorry are you some sort of prize at a fair, or a supermodel? I believe that you are over valuing yourself.

    When accompanied by the word Try, I get the impression that once he has realised that you are the best he has had or ever will have (really its the other-way round) he should then jump through rings of fire and complete quests to be worthy of the possibility of you accepting him back.

    No wonder he wanted no strings, although for possibly different reasons i find your narcissism troubling although not unique. I have found that many women over the last decade or so increasingly believe the same as you do. Unless you change your attitude you will find that long term guys (any guy can be a long term guy with the right partner) won't be interested in you.

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What Guys Said 5

  • There is a way to know if he's going to try to get you back. If he tells you he wants you back then you'll be certain he is trying.

    Don't fritter away your time with him. Your feelings will grow and his won't. Then when he hooks up with someone else you'll be crush.

    To quote Chris Rock, he wants, "new pussy." So it doesn't matter how well you get along, etc. He'll just always be on the hunt for new. He likes the thrill of something different constantly. No matter how nice, beautiful, and smart you are you won't be new.

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  • get rid of him... read back to yourself what you wrote down and posted. He wants to be FWB's only, but also the freedom to date other chicks and sleep with them? No respect for you or your feelings. Get rid of him.

    Seems like he only started dating so he could get the sex, why else would he turn tail after 2 months and want to just be fuck buddies now?

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  • Move on, if he comes around its a bonus !!

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  • I would just try to move on if I was you because if he cared about you as much as you care about him he wouldn't have wanted to meet other girls.

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  • Continue with your life and he still might come back but prepare for the probability that he won't.

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