Would you date someone who had no job and/or dropped out of college?

So I've been seeing this guy for 5 months now. He's super funny, smart, nice, awesome kisser, and overall a pretty good guy. BUT he has no job and stopped going to school a few years ago. (He's 24 now) He has a lot of free time that I just sometimes don't have. We've never really been on a "date," just kind of hung out, for lack of a better term. it doesn't bother me that he doesn't go to school. going to college doesn't automatically make someone a better person. It doesn't bug me that he has no job. I know he's been looking. What bugs me is that he won't let me take him out and pay. I'd like to think I have my shit together, even if I'm only 21. I go to school, have a good job, make decent money, have my own car, I still live at home but only to help my mom with rent and bills. It would be nice to be with a working student, as they would understand my lack of time a bit better, but this guy is really tugging on my heart strings. have you ever dated someone in a similar position? what was the outcome?

  • yes, that doesn't matter
    23% (3)41% (7)33% (10)Vote
  • no, they need to get their shit together
    77% (10)59% (10)67% (20)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It would depend on how hard they were looking. I've known some people that were out of work for months, and when I talked to them about it they told me they were only looking for management positions and stuff... that kind of thing would drive me nuts.

    The way I see it, if you have no job, your job is trying to get a job. So if they were putting in 40 hours a week trying to get a job, then sure, no problem. Working on resumes, getting them out there, blanketing the city trying to get anything to at least get some money coming in while they look for something else. If that still keeps running dry, then trying to find classes to help find something, or some way to intern somewhere... anything. Otherwise you really have to wonder what their 'exit strategy' from unemployment is.

    It's not like they would have to spend every waking minute looking for work, but if they weren't at least putting in 40 hours a week trying to get out of that situation, then I would know that their unemployment isn't because of a lack of opportunity, it was because of a lack of effort. And that gives me concern fro what else they would not put their effort into. I don't want a partner that will half-ass it when it comes to taking care of kids, or helping pay a mortgage, or whatever. If one partner becomes ill for an extended period of time, the other needs to cover that problem, and I would need to know the person was capable of that.

    At least, all of this is if I was considering the person for a long term relationship. If it's just a summer fling or something I wouldn't care at all.

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    • I agree, any job could be used as a stepping stone! What matters to me is seeing someone put effort.

    • Yeah, exactly. And it shows that the person is willing to put in the time to get one. That's what's more important than how much they make or what they do.

What Guys Said 5

  • If you get pregnant, your life is crap. You said him not having a job is not a problem, These words will follow you your entire life with this guy.

    All a guy has to do is sex a girl just right and make her feel like the most important person in the world to him and she can fix him her entire life, by working 2 jobs and taking care of the kids. Remember he quit school. Your house will be filled with a lot of broken stuff because he knows how to quit and you will take care of it or don't care. What a woman. He will kiss you as you go off to work and jokenly say "we're all counting on you" have a good day.

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    • Oh goodness, I just got goosebumps imagining this lol. I support myself right now so him not having a job isn't TOO big of an issue at the moment, I'm just not sure how long is too long to wait for him to get his act together. He has a ton of potential that he's just letting slip away. But I'm not into the "fixing" business.

  • That wouldn't bother me and he seems like a pretty nice guy remember you never know he could end up being rich.

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  • Only if she's doing something and has a plan for life.

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    • What is "something"? Like hobbies? Or volunteering? Or just actively searching for a job?

  • As long as she was making an effort to get A job, then it doesn't matter to me. Even if it's part time minimum wage, I'd still be happy.

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  • How is he smart if he has no job and dropped outta college?

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What Girls Said 3

  • It depends but most likely not.

    No job I can deal with - my boyfriend is unemployed. But dropping out? Eh...

    My boyfriend is in school and is working toward a law degree.

    If he were unemployed and out of school but looking for employment? I would date him. If he were unemployed and out of school and sitting on the couch expecting me to provide for him... I would not.

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    • Yeah it kinda gets to me that this guy doesn't put in as much effort as he should, but it's a very casual relationship right now so I can't really say anything.

  • Of course I would! It would be more free time for us both :D

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  • if he doesn't have a job I'm out, been there done that helping paying for a exs car payments and etc because I wanted to be a caring girlfriend, or helping a boyfriend get out of trouble financially. yea I'm done with all that, if you can't take care of yourself and stuff I'm out. its not that hard to find a job before you quit

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    • That's what I'm scared of, him relying on me and not doing anything to help himself.

    • I did that at age 18-19 never again

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