If there any more than ever more single people out there?

Why is it so hard to find a guy now days? How can someone get approached? I know I get looked at, I catch guys doing it all the time but no one ever approaches. Guys tend not to approach in the bar but will approach my friend, who is wasted.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Communication between the genders is so rough nowadays because many guys have seen so many issues approaching women and they've gotten turned down and have given up. Plus many younger people (both boys and girls) are growing up with no communication skills as it is with all this technology. Any guy can tell you there are women who flip out over holding the door open for them yet see comments online of girls liking that. So guys are very confused and figure if a girl is interested she'll talk to him because no matter what, many guys are afraid of being made out to be bad guys these days.

    For every situation a guy thinks of approaching a girl, if he asks it on here there will be girls saying they don't wish to be approached.

    Approaching a girl in the bar = assumed sex regardless of whether or not he is going for that.
    Approaching a girl in any other situation will have comments of "she's busy shopping, working, etc. Even in someplace like a gym where the guy would already have a common interest would lead to comments of "I'm sweaty and don't want to be approached."

    When it's a situation where you're looking for a cold approach, the intentions are typically assumed to be negative, underhanded, etc. This is why guys prefer to make friends with people so they have a networking into meeting up with a girl. Having a common friend and possible interest in common makes it a lot easier.

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    • I see your point and definitely see how younger people do not know how to communicate. I am 29 and know how to communicate. Have you approached many girls or are you tired of being shot down?

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    • It's a good thing if you're interested, for others they've complained. It's very hit or miss and I think mosta the negative comments about it are just that the dude seems creepy and it's mostly because he's so much older than the young girl.

    • Yeah, I can see that the old men hit on the younger females. I have that a few times where an older guy was trying to hit on me. Which I am friendly but I don't like to lead on so I try not to but it is tough because if other guys are around you don't want to give them the wrong impression if you are attracted to them.

What Guys Said 6

  • Because people don't really approach, it is not "socially acceptable" to do so unless the other side is explicitly open to it.

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  • Either they want to stay single do some reason or they're unsure of themselves. I'm a combination of both..

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  • easy cause its hard to find girls

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    • What?

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    • I am sorry you have that impression. Not all women are like that. I hope you can one day learn to trust them again. :)

    • I can only hope

  • why is it hard to find a girl now days? i have the same issue as u..

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  • Have you considered doing the approaching yourself? This is the 21st century, there's no taboo anymore. Why should we have to step up and face the rejection every single time?

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    • I have usually been the one doing the approaching. One guy I approached - he was in a serious relationship - but I did get a job out of it. Couple other guys I approached I was a day late - they just entered relationships - these guys are now married to these girls. Last guy I approached - he wasn't in a relationship - seemed interest but never lead anywhere.

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    • It probably doesn't help that I'm really not a "club and bar" kind of person.

    • Most guys I know like it that I approach but it doesn't lead to anything.

  • How many guy friends do you have that are single?

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    • All my guy friends are married. I have my best friend I hang out with and her husband. Then I have a couple other couples I hang out with and all their friends are in relationships. They have brought it up to me because they do not want me to be single.

What Girls Said 2

  • I have this issue... Or the guys are just focused on sex... So even when I get approached it's not what I'm looking for.

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    • Could it be the age difference? Younger guys just want sex at early 20's. I am almost 30.

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    • Hmm. I tend to go slightly older too but I feel I do not live in a popular city to be single but I know it is. It is not like I live in the country.

    • I live in a retirement community that promotes men to act like boys while mom dad gma and gpa pay for everything and gives them houses to live in... So the immaturity through the ages is enhanced. I just moved to this town...

  • I feel the same way. guys always approach the easy ones, it seems like they're never looking for anything serious or longterm. oh well, guess you and I are both out of luck lol

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    • Well, I don't want to be "out of luck" I want to find that guy.

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