Why is my boyfriend like this?

So my boyfriend has a big group of friends he has known for years. They like to meet up sometimes and hang out. I have hung out with them maybe 10 times in the last 8 months. However, every time we go to a hangout or mini party thing. He ditches me, like one time he said you dont have to be stay with me go hang out with the girls. Which I get but I dont know any of these people. I am the type that is shy till I open up plus I am the youngest one I am early 20s and they are all late 20s. This past weekend he wouldn't even stand next to me or sit next to me when we ate, he doesn't get me a drink or anything I have to ask others. We went to play volleyball and he was like in front of everyone screaming no I dont want you on my team. Its like this is his friend time so why am i here? Bc i come to spend time with him. But he calls me up at the last minute and says hey were going to this everyones going and i go bc i have nothing better to do and i do like his friends but its just strange how little he has to do with me. At the very end we all watch a movie and he will sit and hold me with everyone around but thats it. Sometimes its like he wants me to act like i dont know him. The other thing he does was last night we were on the phone and he verily does any talking thats pretty normal. but we hadn't talked all day long or seen each other. Were on the phone 5 mins and in the middle of me talking he says why are we even on the phone there's nothing to talk about, i say okay then goodbye. I was pissed i dont text him while he is working or if he has a day off and he is busy doing stuff i give him space I just wanted a end of day goodnight call and he was a jerk. now he is texting me goodmoring and I am ignoring it. why is he acting like this? how do i show him its not okay with me? I have told him alll about all of this stuff he doesn't care. He does nothing.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'd just tell him: Dude, you're an insensitive asshole! I go to these things to be friends with your friends and you totally ignore me. I try chatting to you and you basically tell me to hang up. Not cool!

    I'm sure you listen to him bore on about stuff at the end of a long day, it's just part of being in a relationship. He needs to realise you are there to be with him, you aren't dating his friend's girlfriends so why would you want to be left all day alone with them?

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    • Yeah i listen to all his crap, i help him with all his stuff and he is no where to be found when its my turn.

    • Then put it to him like that. Be straight up, there's a time and place for subtlety. Getting a point across to a man is not the time.

    • yeah i think i am going to just make him work for it.

What Guys Said 1

  • You sound like a wonderful girl. He's an unappreciative, inconsiderate, idiot who doesn't really want you. Don't tolerate that kind of treatment. You deserve far better. We all do. Move on. Find someone more mature. Someone who treasures you, and the time you can and do spend together.

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    • yeah i think your right apparently he thinks he is too good to be a "good" boyfriend but he will realize how good he had it when I am not there anymore.

What Girls Said 1

  • Tell him that if he doesn't show you respect you won't show him any respect. Next time he invites you to something tell him there's no point for you to go if he's just going to go off with his friends and leave you in the mud. Stick up for yourself! If he can't understand this then he doesn't really appreciate you, and you should definitely consider leaving him.

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    • I agree I think I am going to just tell him i am not attending the events with them if he acts like that. Its like some events if it calls for couples he wants us to be all together but if its like a hang thing he wants me to stay away. Its all or nothing i think.

    • Agreed. I think you should definitely do that.

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