Introducing girls to your male friends?

Okay, so what's your opinion on this? Personally this has blown up in my face. Most of the time I'm a confident guy and secure , but that can quickly change when people do stuff to make me insecure. My friends always pressure me to bring the girls around. They're slightly more alpha than I am, but are also guys that remain single and look for quick sex, when I'm looking for something more than that although I can be somewhat shy around girls from time to time. I also sometimes get pressured by the girls I talk to to introduce them to my friends. I always hesitate cause I don't know if it's a trap or just she wants to feel important enough to be included in my life, which is totally understandable. But, I almost always fear the first... the trap being she's using me to find other options through my friends or using the threat of being romantic and talking to my friends as leverage to make me jealous and control me, which is a cruel way to get a guy to step up his game. If a girl does that to me, I end it on the spot. Not making it up, it has happened.

Now, my friends can be assholes, which is why im hesistant to bring serious prospects around. My one friend has already hooked up two girls I brought around and was somewhat serious about. That really pissed me off. And full on had sex with them. I dropped those girls too cause I have no respect for them after the matter. They only knew my friend a couple hours and hooked up with him. And these were girls I was about to ask to be my girlfriend. A couple other girls, he went behind my back, got their number and started talking to them. The next day I'm hanging out with that girl and she isn't paying attention to me but instead her phone texting someone and she tells me she's texting my friend... I take a quick glance at her phone secretly without being obvious and they're making plans to hangout without me there, which is his idea. Wtf? I know this is insecurity, but for legitimate reasons. I stopped talking to her.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I see you are a clear picture of what your woman would be like, and you do not hesitate to drop the ship with you see it going out of course.
    All I can say you just have been unlucky with both your friends and the girls you bring in.
    So you either be persuasive and convince them to change their behavior (your friends and the girl), through reasoning and respect (for them and your self). OR just try to make better future selection and evaluation for what girl you will bring AND your future friends because you have to drop the ones you have (or simply avoid them for the time, while clarifying that to the girls).

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    • Trouble is I come out looking like the insecure asshole and my friend not so bad when I'm really just been sent through the blender in the whole thing. Feeling betrayed by two people at the sametime is the worst. Trouble is, his justification is she was single and we weren't technically together at that point. But we're going to be. But, she can use the same defense too. Just cause it dosent break an "official" rule still dosent make it right or ethical. I didint bring girls around for my friends. I brought them around to introduce a girl I'm serious about. To show her I'm serious about her. And it's backfired everytime.

    • Yeah, I know what you are feeling, in it is what I understood, so please read what I wrote again because I see your just unlucky with people (and they are OK with things you are not).
      I want to add one point though, may be there is something different in you that your friends have. In case that "this thing" is a quality and a principle not only you want to keep it like that, but also you want your woman to acknowledge this part of your personality then we are back to my 1st option.

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