Is dark skin really /that/ unattractive?

Yesterday, I asked a boy to go to a dance with me, and he said no. When I asked him why, he said it was because he only dates white girls, he himself also being white. I wasn't actually asking him to date me, he's my friend and I just wanted him to "escort" me.

I have straightened hair, large breasts, and a thin waist. I weigh a healthy weight. I've won two beauty pageants as a child. I think my face is very proportionate, with prominent cheekbones and small but full lips, and my skin tone is similar if not slightly darker to that of Kerry Washington. I've never considered myself ugly before.

The thing is, this isn't the first time I've been turned down for not being a white girl. In fact, it's about the sixth. I've dated latino and black men before, who've called me beautiful and kindhearted. Over the years, though, I've started to come to the conclusion that white girls are basically the "golden standard of beauty," especially in Europe and certain Asian countries. And every girl on beauty magazines I've ever seen is white, every lead of every TV show is white, every skincare product is made for light skin, every shampoo and conditioner in commercials are made for Caucasian hair types. I've never felt so inadequate and unattractive until I opened my eyes and realized this.

Is dark skin really /that/ unattractive?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There is a stigma which is complete bullshit. I grew up in a predominantly white area so I never knew that many dark people growing up. Ironically one of the few black people I knew in my mostly white city was actually one of my closest friends. I remember riding the bus to and from class the other year and I always saw this other girl that went to the school that was black. She was drop dead gorgeous.

    No dark skin is not less attractive but the media has seriously destroyed their chances in the dating world and people are easily brainwashed.

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What Guys Said 24

  • i1127.photobucket.com/.../...f.com-add-text_15.gif I fucking LOVE a dark skin mocha chocolate colored susta with an even skin tone <3 <3 <3 like Keke Palmer, Bria Myles or Gabrielle Union such a damn turn on #RandomThoought kinda like @Mgoods <3

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    • I fucking LOVE a dark skin mocha chocolate colored susta with an even skin tone <3 <3 like keke palmer, bria myles or Gabrielle union such a damn turn on #randomthoought kinda like @mgoods <3

    • Remember she's under 18, fella.

    • @Nobodycares Lol your point is? It's obviously apparent that I wasn't talking about the QA man lol... I was talking about what I like/love in general... Jell go look at my question called"what's you thought on legal age?" To see my whole take on a sitatuion like that

  • No, I like dark skinned black girls.

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  • The media brain washes people into thinking that.

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    • Or just preference

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    • Exactly, @OpinionOwner !!! Where do you think your "preference" comes from? The Media!! Something that society deems as Attractive.

    • Exactly! Its like hatred where do you think we learn that? The media. You got music that shows it because of heartbreak from these brand new artists or these sell outs. TV shows it too. But there is music and movies that opens are eyes. Unfortunately this guy "Ulyss" has his eyes closed. I've dated all types of chicks and I bet the ones he prefer will use him for their personal propaganda. Just saying...

  • WELP!
    Better buy a a white pointed funny mask and a white robe then.

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    • That's not funny. That's not even remotely funny.

    • ah well there's not much we can do about the situation is there?
      If we can't change the situation , why be mad?

    • There will be people who find some attractive , there will be people who won't.
      Why waste time proving to those who don't think so when there are people who think you are?
      Why not spend your time on them instead?

  • Not to me. It can look great.

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    • "can'. Ouch.

    • @BangBadBxtches
      Pale can look good. Olive can look good, brown can look good, dark black can look good. There are good and bad looking women with every skin tone. The skin tone isn't a factor to me, that's all I meant.

    • Too late bruh.

  • LOL no one is "brainwashed" to not be attracted to black girls. People like what they like. Are the 90% of black girls who prefer black guys brainwashed to dislike white or Asian guys? Nope, just their preference.

    The way things are headed, the pc police will soon be telling us we're criminally racist if we don't ask out at least one black girl a month. Apparently it's ok for black girls to reject white guys for any reason, but the minute a white white guy rejects a blac's a crime against humanity and a sign of inherent bigotry of the white man.

    Grow up. Not everyone will like you. People may reject you for a million reasons, as is their right. Not every action of others is motivated by some evil conspiracy to inconvenience black people.

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    • Well written. From where I'm from, black girls don't want anything to do with white guys. Now, suddenly, there are all these black girls who want to know why white guys aren't paying attention to them. It doesn't make a lot of sense to me.

  • There's a lot of racists around, but you don't need them in my opinion.

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  • nope it isn't. its most likely just by chance he had a different preference

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  • the media puts things in are head and when we constantly see it thats what we end up liking, so a lot of guys only like what they like cause of tv, internet etc... same thing with females where basically being programmed if you actually do the study

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  • First of all, it's his preference to date whom he wants. There are plenty of black girls who would turn down any white guy who asked them out because they only date black guys. In fact, most black girls only date black guys. Should they be called out for that?

    Dark skin is not inherently unattractive. A lot of white guys don't date black girls because of cultural factors. There are so many differences between black and white cultures that it makes a serious, long-term relationship exceedingly difficult. It's hard enough to fit into someone else's family, even more so if that family is of another culture.

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    • And what exactly is so different about the cultures? There's no such thing, not any one race has any one culture. Black people exist in places all over the world, and so do white people. You don't belong to any culture because of your race, you belong to one based mostly on the place you grew up in. New York culture is much different from Alaska culture. Jamaican culture is much different than Japanese culture. Mexican culture is different than Spanish culture. I don't do anything different than a white person because I'm black, I live in America, I eat pizzas and hamburgers like anyone else. And the question isn't about white or black or anything, it's about dark skin. Black people aren't the only people in the world who have dark skin.

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    • You seem really desperate to have other people validate you as a black girl, like you want people to tell you that you're better than all the white girls who you see getting attention. I feel sorry for you.

      If you're so oblivious that you don't know the differences between black and white cultures, I'll give you a few: music, food, outlook on education, attitudes toward law enforcement, tipping in restaurants, etc.

    • I love how you were under 18 as an anon, but you get a name and suddenly you're 19. Lie much?

  • I'm highly attracted to darker skin tones!

    But like every other feature, some like darker tones, some like lighter tones.

    But unfortunately too many whitewashed people have been swayed to think "lighter is better"... when they may naturally be neutral about skin tone preference.

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  • I think to most people it is not nowadays,
    but to some it still is, I just don't really like dark skin, I don't even like tanned skin, but prefer pale one! I don't think dark skin is ugly, I just don't think it's attractive.

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    • Boohoo, stop crying little faggots and whores

  • Did he say, "I am hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooooooooooo-wyte!" ?

    Southerners pronounce it that for some reason.

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  • I'm Asian and I'm generally more attracted to Asian girls or girls that have caucasian like features even if their skin is not necessarily white.

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  • Its not that it, its just his opinion, and what he prefers. Im sure you're very beautiful but its not the same for everyone!

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  • some people are attracted to dark skin and some people aren't. that's just the way it is, and its the way its always been

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  • Nope.
    Are you crazy?

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  • I'm Latino with a tanned olive complexion and brown during the summer. I've felt this way for so long and through my years, I've learned some people will like me others won't and it's not about my looks all the time. I feel like a misfit myself too but we must believe we are attractive because what matters more is a beautiful heart, which is quite rare. Also rock you're looks! I find some black women to be extremely attractive more than girls from other races. Society should aspire to look more like us, use your effort to concentrate on other areas of yourself. Learn another language, pick up an artistic talent like painting, make friends with people who see past colour, before you realize it 3 years will have gone by and you will be a completely different person, but you'll live to share your experience with someone else who will go through the same thing.

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  • in this world since a particular governmental party has taken over yes. They think that anyone other than their own is the superior. They are entititlists and elitists (not the whole, just those who are picked to represent them) Nothing is wrong with being dark skinned.

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  • you must understand that some men go for the archetype they 've grown up with. i can't date black girls not because they are any less beautiful but because i can't relate to their unique type.

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    • You mean a stereotype, not a "unique type." Okay, suuure.

    • no, there is a huge difference in the structure of black women's face. in fact it has some more beautiful elements than white girls' like full lips, pretty noses and nice eyelashes, generally speaking its different though. i'm not used to this different structure. if i was born around black women, and i lived this archetype through my childhood and young adulthood, i'd date black women. if you don't want to believe it it's your problem not mine... .

    • Not all black girls have wide noses, big butts, thick lips. It's literally just a stereotype. My nose is narrow and my lips are small/average. I'm a black girl, and I'm telling you that it's not "in general," it's a stereotype.

  • I only like white girls and some Asians

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  • Honestly speaking, I can find some dark skinned girls sexually attractive, but as far as the non sexual aspect goes, I greatly prefer white girls.

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    • I don't understand the preference. Why? Why is one race more appealing than the other? What, in your head, makes you look at a black girl as a sex object and a white girl as an actual person?

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    • Because the media worships white girls, maybe? Because you've been brainwashed by society's and the media's beauty standards and can't look past the color of someone's skin and see the person as who they are? Because you believe in the stereotypes about black girls? You're gonna say no, but I know it's true. You're literally objectifying one race and not the other, how can you not think that's racist? It's one thing to think certain skin tones are more "attractive," I really don't care about that, it's another to condemn an entire race as less than a person, as a piece of meat for sex.

    • Lol, ok. Stay mad.

  • What did you except? White American Men are extremely bigoted, racist and xenophobic. That explain why most Puerto Rican girls aren't attracted to them.

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    • It's racist to have a physical preference?

      I guess I'm racist for not liking Indian food.

  • yes yes it is

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What Girls Said 15

  • OMG it really breaks my heart reading your question cause I used to feel the same way, In my case I'm mixed black Persian/ Colombian and I never understood why no one liked me Latinos cause I was too dark and black cause I was not black enough :( but you know what I learned to love myself and at the end of the day well the people who love and care about you are the only ones allowed in your head and mind the the rest give them the boot and forget about them they don't know what they're missing, I really wish you the best and know that you're beautiful No matter what anyone else think... YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL

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  • no it's not unattractive. that guy was just a loser.

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    • not a loser just had different preference for girls.

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    • I guess that makes every girl who rejected a guy based on her preferences a loser as well.

    • if u read what i wrote after my opinion u won't make this statement -.- @bigjake

  • The way I see it, if someone thinks the more pigment I possess, the uglier I must be; that is a matter for them.

    Most people have European ideals of beauty in the western world, the predominant race is white- they depict the beauty standard. Stands to reason that when you grow up in a society that tells you what beauty is, you adhere to those notions... and then you turn around and call them "preferences" and act like it's innate, as though the external world had absolutely no influnce on your taste...

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  • Dark skin isn't that attractive.

    I think you hit the nail on the head - TV shows like to show the leads as whites. They'll always have a "token black guy" but it's mostly whites. It's partly because Americans are thought of generally as either a melting pot or white (because they originated from UK which is known for white skin. Same with Australia).

    You shouldn't beat yourself up about it though. I mean, have you ever noticed that the lead is usually very skinny with perky breasts and natural make up? Possibly not because you were noticing your insecurities.

    My point is, you'll always notice the things about someone else that you are most insecure about yourself. I'll always see a slim waist and flat tummy before I see a beautiful face on a girl because that's my biggest insecurity. It's natural and it's okay.

    You are beautiful how you are. Who cares you don't look like you're fresh of 90210. There's more to life than that, move on from this jerk and go onto someone who cares!

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    • Get the fuck outta hear with that shit, the only reason whites are leads on TV is because your ancestors being the piece of shit people you are decided to go around the world raping and pillaging everybody and everything in sight. I wish the Chinese would have never given you scumbags gunpowder.

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    • When you brought up not being American, and everyone knows about white Americans and slavery and nice try with the "UNattractive" cop out, too late though.

    • Really? Cop out? Look at the last paragraph. @bangbadbxtches

      I think you need to calm down. I didn't personally go and enslave blacks. I have no issues with other colours, despite my typo. It's people like you who have hate for something people like me never did. What am I supposed to so about it? Find every skeleton and chuck holy water over them? I accept your skin colour, you clearly don't accept mine but I'm the issue here? Yeah right. I'm done with this - comment further if you want but I'm not replying. I'm done dealing with you.

  • the boy who said that bullshit to you, he is not your friend. There is nothing in the world unattractive about dark skin, luv <333 don't listen to people like that.

    As for all the tv shows, products, etc... yeah... I know. But it is not because white women are any more inherently valuable or beautiful or whatever. It is because of white supremacy and nothing else. The capitalists who make tv shows and sell products, they are doing it to make money, you know? And they are willing to do evil things, and keep money in white hands, and whatever else.. They are monsters.

    But really, in real life, you are so valuable, I swear to god <3333

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  • No, it's not. Some people just don't prefer dark skinned people and that's okay.

    " Over the years, though, I've started to come to the conclusion that white girls are basically the "golden standard of beauty," especially in Europe and certain Asian countries. And every girl on beauty magazines I've ever seen is white, every lead of every TV show is white, every skincare product is made for light skin, every shampoo and conditioner in commercials are made for Caucasian hair types."

    It's been happening for years, hon. But it's definitely stopping because more races are being embraced. and shown that they're beautiful. (This is also a reason why "Black Girls Rock" was invented).

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  • There's a pretty thin line between being racist and blaming certain things on "preference". Dark brown to light brown skin is beautiful, beauty is attraction therefore don't worry about anything you can't fix. Fix the way you feel about yourself and things will be for the good for you young soul.

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  • I don't think it's unattractive at all.

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  • Your skin color is beautiful! It's just some people have certain preferences. Don't ever think your ugly because of those people. I'm sure there are plenty of white guys who would want to date you :)

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  • When I used to be bi, I didn't like white girls (I am white myself) but I think dark skin is far more beautiful :)

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  • Do you go to an all white school? I felt like you picked those typical males who's only hang out with their own only.

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    • I'm not only attracted to white guys, nor am I desperate for them to like me. Like the post says, I've dated people of diverse ethnicities. Race isn't a factor for me to like someone. I'm just hurt because I've started to realize that my skin color will always be a factor weighing against me in this society.

    • Are you sure? why do you always go for the white ones only to get turned away? So just because a white person turns you down, suddently you're in a conundrum questioning your skin colour? Try being a model, and they will tell you, rejection is a part of life, and be prepared when people get realistic to say what works with you or what doesn't or because your features aren't what they want. White people get rejected too.

      You make it about racism when it's really not. People have different tastes and just because a few white boys turn you down... you think it's a cause for thinking your skin colour is a detriment.

  • The answer is no.

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  • I think people with dark skin are beautiful. I'm jealous.

    That guy is an asshole. He deserves to marry a trashcan, then.

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  • Please do not feel that way, hun. I bet you are very beautiful. Did you know that my black friend receives way more male attention than me. I am pale skinned and lack male attention. Even though a group of guys pointed out look at these "fine ladies" go, men find her more attractive than me. I have seen many dark skinned beauties. My cousin who is dark skinned is actually a model not only because she is so very beautiful, but because she is thin and tall. There also unattractive white women and they get pointed out more for their unattractiveness than other races who are not white because the light skin attracts attention of comparison since media controlled by white racist bigots have made the white women and men to be super. White women are actually not being taken seriously because of what the shallow, vulgar society have expected. God loves you. Jesus might have darker than he is.

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  • He's racist that's all + he might not be attracted to you. Forget about him he cause you're probably beautiful. I've been asked out by white guys and I'm dark.

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    • It's not racist to not find dark skin physically attractive.

      I don't date guys. I suppose I'm a sexist too? And I don't date vegetarians, what would you call that? Religious discrimination?

    • I didn't say it was racist to not find dark skin attract rive. The reasoning or mindset behind it is what makes it racist. Which is why I listed it separately. "I don't do black chicks" is a sign of racism because it's implying that he doesn''t date black girls because they're somehow not good enough. If he would have said something like "i don't find you attractive" or at least "i'm not really attracted to black girls" that would be different bc it just comes down to attraction. @koko124

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