Is this guy trying to save face after rejection, or am I clueless?

This guy I met while getting my oil changed sent me a text out of the blue yesterday (got my number from a business card that I handed him for my massage therapy business). He asked if I wanted to chill some time, and "maybe get some dinner."

I told him the truth, that I have just gotten out of a bad relationship and I wasn't really looking to date right now, but I thanked him for the offer.

He immediately replied "ok," but six hours later he texts me and says "U know I wasn't trying to date you or anything. I was just lookin to chill sometime... I just got out of a 9 year relationship... so"

Now, he never specifically used the word "date," but I have been under the strong impression my whole life that if a man asks you to dinner, that is a DATE not just "chilling." I'm confused. Is he just trying to save face after being (politely) rejected, pretending that he wasn't actually interested in me like that, or am I just clueless?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • He was not only trying to save face and kind of passive aggressively throw a shot at you. He was likely embarassed and bitter for getting rejected, so to make himself feel better, he basically said: "Yeah you're not actually good enough for me to date, I was just trying to be nice to you so don't go thinking that you hurt my self esteem or anything, you're not too good for me!." He's a douche, ignore him.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I think saving face.

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  • I think he was saving face. Let it go.

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  • You don't know it's a date till he insists on paying. The wallet exposes all.

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  • Yeah, just trying to save face, especially since he contacted you from a business card.

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What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

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