Will it be harder to find a man if I were to be my actual self up front?

I've never shown my true self because I don't think the guy that I would want to be eventually marry would have the personality to handle it (or at least handle it and stay faithful!). But I know so many girls whose personality seems ugly to me in one way or another and they are actually married. But if I were MY true self up front, I wouldn't date me, let alone be considered marriage material. Did anyone else feel this way until they met the person they're currently with, or can anyone give me advice? If you ask me to be myself you may as well ask me to be the witch who poisoned Snow White. LOL.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I did feel like this for a long time. It was about two years after I graduated high school that I stopped caring about whether or not people would like me. I acted like my true self everywhere I went. People do like who I am. The night I met my wife was no different, there was nothing that I hid from her and here we are today married.

    If you never show your true self, then you will never know who will truly love you =) Be yourself. Show everything you have and you will attract the kind of people that love that person!!!

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What Guys Said 1

  • What is it about your real self that is going to drive men away?

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    • Too much to describe! But my main issue would be that I have a huge ego centered around my intelligence or lack thereof, so if my man and I have a difference of opinion, I would feel inclined to attack if my intellect feels threatened, and it does falsely and far too often. I am the poorest sport a man will ever meet in this respect. Thanks for asking.

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    • Sound like you were frustrated with needing bot get approval from someone on the past. It's just a conjecture. Have you ever tried therapy?

    • I talked to a counselor, she did say the same thing: strong need for approval, but I haven't learned how to get over it yet. Interesting, it seems simple now: once i master this and learn to feel comfortable with myself then someone will come along. Duh, that makes sense. Thank you sir!

What Girls Said 1

  • Then go ahead and be the witch who poisoned Snow White! Lol you need people to like you for YOU.

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