Why do some women still believe that it is a man's job to ask the lady out?

it is the men job to call the lady first and not the other way around and if a men do not do those things it means the men is not interested in the women cause that is a men duty not the women duty.

I mean in these modern times I think roles are changing right

What is wrong of a women taking the lead in those duties? Will men feel bad or feel less then

I am talking of men and women adults.

Updates:
I asked this because a lady told me why I be the one texting a male friend to re-confirm how are we stand for a movie date this weekend that if he does not call or tex is because he is not interested. I mean the last time I text this friend was 2 weeks ago so I thought to re confirm becuase in 2 weeks hey may had forgotten it, some men forget things
To update the issue that case is my personal case at this moment. The guy in question is 42 years old Im 44, he is divorced no kids, single and Im still single too.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • ... in the animal kingdom it is' just instincts the male kills, gathers, etc to get the attention, approval of the female. In humans both genders have equal agency to take the first step' the only difference is most often woman don' t handle rejection' men don't like rejection but have been accustomed to it so most of us have excepted the role of the asker... there isn't any rule book... not by nature' where this exist... either try your best to think for your self or be just another human parot and or tape recorder.

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    • I like your answer very much very neutral

What Guys Said 11

  • From my experience, this is only true with people in your age group and OLDER. I don't know many girls in my age group who feel this way. However, many young women in their 20's also think it's "creepy" when a guy approaches them, unless the guy is rich and famous.

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  • You are correct. Roles and expectations have shifted. And there is nothing wrong at all with a woman taking the initiative if she finds a someone attractive. I would say that if a man feels weird or threatened by being the one who is approached, then either he is not the one for you, or he needs to wake up to the new reality/normal. Otherwise he WILL be left behind. Clinging to the old ways won't bring them back, and really, is impossible.

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    • So there wotn be aproblem if I re confirm with this guy about our movie date this weekend? Cuase the last time we text was 2 weeks ago or should I wait this Friday to check if the guy texts me first to remind me of the date cause if he wotn text for sure he probably had forgotten that is why I wanted just to re confirm if we were always up for the movies. I mean I dont want to sound im coming to strong for him or that Im desesperate to go out I want to act as normal as possible, So then what to say to sound as normnal as possible when I will text him to re confirm?

    • Show All
    • So should I go for it and re confirm with this guy this weekend?

    • Absolutely. Go find out if there's interest or magic there. See how he treats you once you are there in person, and if you like him and sense a real connection.

  • it's just that they want the guy to take the risk of rejection, as they have in the past...
    Women today don't BELIEVE the guy should do this, but it sure is EASIER on them if he does...

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  • But most women don't really have to take the trouble and ask men out, since they are approached by men fairly regularly.

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  • To be blunt, because most women will get approach ENOUGH, to the point that they won't feel the need to "approach" at all.

    It's natural to take the path of least resistance, and many women do that.

    Why put yourself at risk for something, when that thing comes to you without much effort?

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    • With what you say it means it is ok if a women once in a while ask men out specially if they are adults?

    • in my opinion I don't have a problem with that at all!

      Unfortunately too many girls these days are too entitled and spoiled to go through a possible rejection!

  • I may be old fashioned but I believe the guy should officially ask her out on a date. But I feel that now a days it is perfectly okay for the lady to come up to the guy and state that she likes him. and maybe go as far to say that she would say yes if he asked her out. For the guy to ask her out is to tell her that he is interested in her and willing to buy her dinner just to get to know her. She is the prize. I have to earn her respect and prove to her that I will treat her right.

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    • and what if the roles are reversed? I mean you said for a guy to aks a woman out is to tell her that he is interested and wiling to buy her dinner, etc Why a woman can't ask him out and do the same exact thing that she is iinterested in him and want to get to know h im better?

  • I agree. If he won't make the move, put your big girl panties on and take the initiative! Lol
    I could go on but it might sound rude so I'll stop there lol

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  • Society says the man has to ask out the woman but fuck society and ask the guy out, don't listen to society ladies.

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  • nope my gal askd me out!!!

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  • Because of entitlement, and because the current recipe seems to work just fine for most.

    Women in general aren't risk takers.
    That's why all major companies, and other things that require a hint of initiative, are built by men.
    And as a result we have feminists coming down on men, screaming 'patriarchy' and 'oppression'.

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    • So you think a women should go for it? ANd stop once in a while these society norms?

    • Definitely.

      I can tell you for sure, that men currently taking a 'female' approach, waiting for someone to just fall out of the sky for them to date, aren't having much luck.
      How much is equal opportunities worth, if you don't seize them

      I believe a lot of women would have a lot better luck with men, if they picked them out themselves, not only from the row of douches lining up to take advantage.
      Would definitely make the dating scene much more interesting and dynamic for everyone.
      At the very least we won't have to answer another 'Why do I always hook up with shitty guys?' question, when the answer is 'Because you apparently know how to pick them'.

  • That is SOOOOOOOO SEXIST!!!

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What Girls Said 8

  • Just about every guy I know says that they like when a girl is forward and approaches them. I see nothing wrong with asking a guy out. If you're interested, take control and make a move!

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  • some men don't want to be treated like that... but i personally don't think that it's anybodys "job".
    men and women can both do the same things for the other... i don't think it should matter.

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  • I talked to some guys about this and they said it was not cool if a girl approaches. Makes the man look less manly.

    Personally I think both can do this, but is nicer if the guy asks you out and waaaaaaaaaay hotter, that confidence :).

    But maybe if you get older it is ok for both sides, I don't know I am 22.

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    • Those guys are dumb af that say that. Seriously it's 2015, men shouldn't shouldn't be trying to play that macho BS.

  • I think it's still considered the norm for a man to ask the girl out.

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    • The society norm? So is wrong to bend a bit the society rules?

    • A lot of things have been considered the norm, like sexism for example. The norm does not equal right.

    • I don't think it's wrong.

  • I'll tell a guy I like them and see if they'll ask me out. I just like when the guy does it and some guys prefer the old way. I know a guy that likes the old way and he'll reject the girl if she asks because of that.

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  • If I ask a guy out people would think I'm desperate, so I won't ^^

    That's the case in some places :)

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    • So you only care what others think?

    • Here if I'd do that, even the guy would think that way. He would think I'm easy and I don't like to give that kind of impression.

  • girls are suppose to be treated like princesses. the prince ask the princess. when boys asks girls out it more romantic.

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    • Maybe that will apply if the pricne and princesses are teenagers not adults

    • your right

  • in my experience the men will call if interested, and they still call when im not interested.

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