I was made fun of at work for being an older virgin, which mgets me thinking... Am I chopped liver or something?

I was humiliated and made fun of by a group of insecure, unhappy in their own marriage type a- holes. I swear I was holding my own until it just started to dawn on me that I am 31 and I've yet to feel, what even a decent hug feels like.
Women treat me like I'm some weirdo. Anxiety issues and bad child hood really messed my mind up over the years so I self depricate and my family are to blame for a lot of my negativity.
I don't even feel like going back to work. I've just been feeling really down and suicidal. I mean can't at least one person find it in their heart to make me feel like a normal human being. I'm not even asking for sex just affection of some sort.
I really really hate my life.


0|0
7|5

Most Helpful Guy

  • Have you considered seeing a psychiatrist? The whole anxiety, bad childhood and suicidal things are more serious than you might think. I've been in your shoes, I know how you feel, but I also know that it gets bettter if you allow it.

    None of this is related to your colleagues being complete pricks though. That was simply uncalled for.

    1|1
    0|1
    • Just saw the other comment - never mind :)

    • Thanks! Their comments were that I wasn't a man that I'm too old now and that if I have kids I'd be too old to take care of them and such horrible things to say. They have no idea what I've been through.

    • No, they don't. Plus none of those things even make sense. Don't give up bro, life can be good even if you had a bad start.

What Girls Said 7

  • Honestly, just going to tell you this: your sex life should never be anyone else's business to try not to share it. Not because you need to be ashamed, but because it isn't appropriate and people will abuse the knowledge, such as in this case.

    The issue you're having is you are putting all of the responsibility on everyone else. You say it's all your family's fault - I'm sure they're the source, but you're the one who has to find it in yourself to fix it unfortunately. You also say you need someone to make you feel normal, but right now, in the poor condition you are in, you have nothing to offer them. You're basically asking someone to just love you and fix you, which is nearly impossible to find. This doesn't mean you're not worth dating or loving, you're just not in the proper position to.

    I recommend you seek help, be it professional or free group help to deal with your issues before you even worry about a relationship. You clearly have deep rooted issues and need assistance. Don't resort to suicide though, if you feel suicidal, contact a suicide hotline IMMEDIATELY.

    As for going back to work, the best thing to do is act like you are unbothered and don't give a shit. When people feel they have power over you, they abuse it. If they feel you don't care, they'll get bored and move on. Also consider talking to a supervisor if you must. Also tell them the fact that they care about your sex life is laughable.

    0|1
    0|0
    • I have have so much to offer people. I have my own interests i can be funny and adventurous. The only thing I don't have going for me is money which I'm working on and a huge group of friends which i know is important for some reason just to look good in public.

    • Show All
    • Sorry to hear that. I have social anxiety disorder

    • It's fine, it doesn't define me. I work with it and have gotten past the thick of it. It's nearly killed me too but when you learn that the past and your disadvantages can only stop you if you let them, you learn to cope and push past them.

  • i think virginity is a very attractive thing in a man.

    0|1
    0|1
  • That's stupid. Don't listen to that!

    0|1
    0|1
  • Have you ever considered therapy? It might prove helpful to you.

    1|1
    0|0
    • I've been going for the last year making tons of improvement but it's moments like these that just take back years

    • Keep going. It'll get easier.

  • hey dont feel that way if you need someone to talk to i'm all ears i'm only 20 but i've been told i have an old soul and i feel lie it too i would love to talk to you and listen to what you have to say find me on facebook just message and remind me that i said i would listen mkay my facebook is La Sable Barker no one should ever feel the way you do

    0|1
    0|1
    • Thanks, I appreciate that..

  • I wish I could actually hug you right now :/

    0|1
    0|1
  • How do they even know you're a virgin? It's none of their business. Anyway, everyone deserves affection and you're a worthwhile human being. They're just idiots unhappy with their own life, as you said. I can't actually hug you as I'd want to, but I send E-hugs and hope you start feeling better. Try talking to a good friend.

    0|1
    0|1

What Guys Said 4

  • Society we live in is fake BS. People say it's ok for men to be virgin but the truth is most people will make fun of you for it. Women will always lie to your face about it being ok and men will look at you as an inferior.

    Very few people are ok with older male virgins. Next time just lie to people. Fuck society!

    0|1
    0|0
    • Their are some good people and they're the one we need to concentrate on but they really are a few of them.

  • I agree with one of the users you may need some counseling...

    1|1
    0|0
  • I'm a virgin. It's not a big deal. I bet their wives are fat.

    1|2
    0|1
  • you should have kept it hidden

    0|1
    0|0
Loading...