Girls, Why do I always attract crazy guys?

So I have an issue with always attracting dsyfuctional/crazy guys. I am not the most sane girl either I am indeed dsyfunctional I will admit. But I am working on myself in the meantime but no matter what it is all I ever seem to attract. I think it is because I am a good listener, compassionate, caring, kind, loving, etc. And I am a huge nurturer and they love a girl that is nurturing.

In the past 9 months I recovered so much from my psychotic break by being in therapy. I applied for college in Jan 2015. And I got a myself good job (I am not talking at a fast food place). I got hired to a retirement home and I am signed up for college in Sept of this year. I am beginning to think it is because I am not smart enough.

But it is too fucking bad for them because the successful/sane ones except WAY too much. They want drop dead gorgeous and an honor roll student! Not my fault I have ADHD. I still have a brain in my head I just happen to not be booksmart. But so what? Does any other girl have this issue? I am not complaining at least people show an interest in wanting to date me.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, like you said you're very nurturing. Perhaps you give them (unintentional) signals that you will take care of them. Perhaps you already do and you allow too much. Maybe it will help to learn to create boundaries and to spot those guys early on and be like 'No. NEXT!' :P Also, with regards to the sane ones, everybody has different desires when it comes to a partner, perhaps you are surrounded by guys who happen to want pretty, smart girls. But it doesn't mean you won't meet someone who likes you for who you are. It's a good first step to recognise which part of you still needs to grow and work on that. It's very brave and smart (ha!) so it's your turn to be 'demanding' and want someone who is (semi-) sane and who likes you for who you are. He's out there. Stay positive! :)

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What Girls Said 9

  • I feel you girl!

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  • not a clue.

    I seem to have this same problem. :/

    funny thing is a lot of guys actually think women drive them crazy, instead of it being that they already were. hmm...

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  • The places you hang out and the people you surround yourself with are probably where you ate meeting these guys. Change those up and go to places whet you think the more "sane" guys are.

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  • opposites attract or they like a stable girl because 2 crazies don't work

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  • It's your personality that attracts them. You give off an air of vulnerability and low self esteem. Dickhead guys can sense it a mile off and secure men rightfully leg it in the other direction.
    Change you and you will find better men are attracted

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  • Funny situation 👀.
    Appear more serious, it will probably intimidate the crazy ones.

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  • We attract who we are

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  • I have had this issue in the past I think we tend to gravitate towards people who have similar characteristics as ourselves. But you said you're working on yourself so continue to focus on that and think about what kind of guy will fit in with the best you. Make those your relationship goals. There's nothing to be ashamed of, you're honest and that's admirable. There will be a good decent guy who will not judge you, just stop feeling like there's something wrong with you. You're human, you're flawed, and this is beautiful. Continue to grow as a person. The universe will bring you closer to your dream guy. Hope you find your happiness I'm waiting too.

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  • I have the same problem. What I've learned over the years is that one of the reasons why I always attract crazy guys is because there are a whole lot of them out there ;-) So those who are not crazy have been taken long ago by other girls who were quicker than us... What's left is the guys who are single for a reason...

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