Guys, tips on making him chase me again after acting too available (without playing too many games). Is it possible?

I like being honest and straight forward. But I've been told it's good to have at least a little bit of game.
Like if I want to see him I'll tell him, I reply to messages as soon as I read them, I don't mind messaging him first etc.
Now I know he's physically attracted to me, and it's not like he's ignoring me but he's not making much effort, if any to see me or talk to me.
I don't want to spend my energy playing games with people but should I back off a bit so he has a chance to chase me more?
A friend told me I should ignore him the next time he messages and he'll want to chase me again- but I don't want to start the pattern of playing games because I wouldn't like that done to me.
Thoughts?


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What Guys Said 2

  • The game = most likely stalemate
    Being forward = a definite outcome, positive or "negative"
    A lot of women will advise to play the game "at least a little" but then again most women aren't used to handling rejection. They give that advice because they don't understand it as rejection, rather they conceptualize it as a trick that is "not working." To that viewpoint, I say "welcome to my world." Honestly it's all about what you want and what feels comfortable. If you don't feel comfortable being forward, play the game. That being said, if you don't want to play chicken, then let him chase and at the height of the chase, come out with it.

    A note:
    The reason women are afraid of rejection is because they're taught from a young age that guys aren't picky and that they're starved buzzards and will go for anything, so of course when a man rejects someone, it should be devastating b/c he'd pick *anybody* before *you*, etc etc, blah blah, ad nauseam. That couldn't be more untrue for all but the most immature, undesirable men. And just like women, when we reject someone, it's not personal (unless they think Apartheid was cool or something) and it's not always about physical attraction. In fact, sometimes I envy heterosexual women in that it's thought their superficial attributes are rejected. Gosh, I can only wish it was my weird nose rather than my awkwardness or confidence being judged. But all that's theoretical. The reality is you have nothing to fear. In fact, it'll be so relieving to not have that as an emotional weight going forward, right?

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    • I know he's physically attracted to me, but I think he'd only be interested in being physical with me
      Sigh
      I guess the best thing is to move on and not waste time on people who want different things
      Thanks for your words of advice :)

    • No prob, anon!

  • by wanting him to chase you not date you, this is just playing games, just go ask him out its 2015 ffs

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