Having ANXIETY, and bad gut feelings about meeting with ex?

My ex got in touch with me last month through facebook, since that time we literally talked 24/7 all day long. I discovered through his behavior in the past that he is a commitment phobe, and I am also one too. This is a major discovery for me.

after spending a month messaging/texting eachother constantly... (He came on to me super strong as commitment phobes do at the early stages of a relationship) he all of a sudden booked a flight down to see me and to also take care of some other personal business.

The second he told me he was coming, i was initially excited... and then completely TERRIFIED. i have been feeling complete anxiety, bad feelings in my stomach.. because of the terrible ways he's been in the past ( He would come on totally strong, and then fade out or disappear after sex) It is then that it hit me, he is probably going to do the same thing he's done to me before!

Now I feel bad because he has booked a flight, (He didn't tell me he was going to do this before he did it). I'm having extreme second thoughts about seeing him. I really want to believe this man cares about me.. but something in my gut is telling me to run away. And I am unsure if this is my inituition, or my commitment phobia? I sent him a message telling him EXACTLY How i feel. (Anxious.. sick to my stomach... scared to be hurt again...) and He looked at the message.. and didn't respond. It's been over 12 hours.

What bothers me is whenever we talk about sex, or whatever - I always get an immediate response. And now.. when I bring things towards my feelings there is a "Delay".

Knowing I am commitment phobic and panic when things get too real (in this case him actually coming to see me) I want to force myself to give him a chance.. but honestly, I'm tired on waiting for him to give me what i WANT AND DESERVE! Even a SIMPLE RESPONSE to my message. What should I do? Will it be wrong to cut him off completely at this point? Knowing that he's booked an expensive flight to where I am?

Updates:
so he responded to the message... said he would pick a time to call me, and then didn't for 2 days. i think he's playing games - i guess we'll see how it all turns out.

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What Guys Said 1

  • better not meet him... till u get rid of it :-)

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What Girls Said 1

  • Cut him off! It's for the best.

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