My mother says she won't approve of me marrying a man who... Advice?

I don't want any hate spewed through this post. I am looking for legitiment advice here...

Ultimately, my mother states she will not approve of me marrying a man who is not a Godly man.

The person I am dating isn't...

I feel as though a lot of family's, who are torn apart by religion or have been on the receiving side of being ridiculed by a judgmental "religious" person, have the repurcution of memeber (s) turning away from God. That breaks my heart.

Anyways, my point is that I can see myself with this man I am dating. I haven't told her about him yet because I don't care to be insulted in my relationship and have to stand on the defense. I don't live on my own at the present moment because I have been in an in-between stage after college. I have a move-in date this November.

Just very distraught in knowing that she won't approve of him...

Any advice?

  • just be with who makes you happy
    100% (13)80% (12)89% (25)Vote
  • if your mother doesn't approve, end it
    0% (0)20% (3)11% (3)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Nobody on this planet will EVER know as much or be concerned about what is right for you as you do. If you live your life to make your mom or anyone else happy you will be sacrificing your own happiness in the process.

    Is sad when families are torn apart over petty issues but ultimately in order to find true happiness and get the most that you can out of this life you have to do what is right for you.

    You are nobody's piece of property. Stand for what you want out of life. If people walk out of your life because of it so be it, it will hurt but you will be better for it in the long run.

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    • Wrong, no one knows you best as your parents no matter how much you hate each other. Do you really think your parents would try to ruin you? Some maybe, but your average parents, absolutely not.

    • My parents have always told me to become a doctor because they thought it would make me happy, but it didn't. They understood and now I'm in pharmacy school. I will always ask my parents to approve my wife and if they don't, she can fuck off.

    • *sigh* Okay, nevermind about the past 2 posts, I didn't read your description before commenting. You're doing the right thing, and your mother is a little fanatic.

What Guys Said 6

  • Remember, one day your mother will be dead so she won't be able to judge you and your desires. What if you gave this guy up because of your mother, he was Mr. Right, he marries someone else, and your mom drops dead the next day? Then you threw away the chance to be happy for the rest of your life which could be decades long.

    Your parent's job is to protect you but protect you from REAL threats, not horseshit threats like ungodliness. You do what you want.

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  • "A" of course... u r an adult now :)

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  • I agree with your mother 100 percent

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  • I want to respect my parents but ultimately it should be my choice...

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  • Marry whoever makes you happy. It's your choice not your mom's

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  • ok good for you

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What Girls Said 2

  • You basically have to balance what you want and need vs what your mom would like.

    What qualities does a "godly" man have? Honesty? Integrity?

    I'm sure your boyfriend has those qualities so what difference does it make if he doesn't go to church every weekend?

    Besides "godly" guys aren't automatically awesome. They can be wife beaters and abusive just as easily (if not more so) than other guys.

    I would ask your mom what makes a godly man and then find specific examples of how your boyfriend exemplifies each quality. If the only thing she doesn't like is that he doesn't go to church like... Come on XD There are way worse qualities.

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  • Better a goodly man than a godly one. Given a choice between a man I liked, trusted, respected and enjoyed spending time with who treated me right, but didn't share my religious beliefs and a guy who was exactly the opposite, there's no contest. I'm also not gonna end things with a guy who had all those good traits in the hope of finding one who had everything I wanted AND shared my faith.

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